Capital Bound
by Mocking Verse
Summary: Sequel to A Dangerous Game: Rachel has won the Hunger Games, only at the price of losing the boy she loved. What's in store for her now?
1. Chapter 1

Capital Bound: Reaping

-Rachel:

I file on stage next to Haymitch as the past victors of District Twelve are read off. The only names given are our own. Haymitch and I both sigh and sulk back into our chairs as the Treaty of Treason is read. Basically it says that since the Districts revolted against the Capital seventy three years ago, we are being punished by participating in the Hunger Games. Since it's the first time mentoring for me I look over the hundreds of kids gathered in the square, two of them we will mentor. I glance over and see Haymitches eyes drooping; I quickly elbow him in the gut.

"What is it over?" He asks

"No, but at least stay awake" I hiss.

"touchy" he rolls his eyes at me.

I watch as Effie Trinket, our districts escort, makes her way over to the boys reaping ball. "Men first!" she trills in her usual happy voice. Was it really just a year ago that she drew Peeta's name out of that very ball? Was it really that long ago that I volunteered so I could save him? It must be, but it seems like it's been a lifetime. But every day without Peeta lasts forever, and now that he's gone, every day is like a nightmare that I'm constantly reminded of him. I close my eyes and take deep breaths as I was instructed to do when I felt like I would break, that's what the doctors told me to do.

"Saga Dell!" Effie calls out, I allow my eyes to open and see the boy making his way over to the stage. I study him; he's not big, but not small either, he's a boy from the Seam, but he looks to be well fed. Wavy black hair and clear blue eyes, just like-

I snap my eyes shut again, thinking of Peeta, but the darkness of my mind shows me his face, shows me Peeta's loving eyes. I have to open my eyes again though, so I can shake Saga's hand. I do this; he gives me a firm shake and a blunt nod of his head. Then Effie goes over to the girl's ball. I wonder what she's thinking we she does this? Then again, I wonder what goes through that big head of hers all the time, it's a scary thought, so I throw it out. Effie quickly pulls out a name and goes to the podium, "Ginger Monroe!" Effie calls out. I make out the group of girls who start hugging one another, then one girl breaks away and walks towards the stage. She's also a Seam girl, but not well fed. She's tiny, weak, and frail. She's a bloodbath death for sure.

After shaking her hand the anthem plays, then Haymitch and I make our way to the train as the tributes get to say their goodbyes. "Saga might go far" I comment not really directing the question to Haymitch, more to me.

"Yeah, he can if he knows how to us a weapon. I think Ginger is a bloodbath though" my father grumbles.

"Same thought here" I point to my own head, which brings a grin on Haymitches face.

The next morning I'm the first one into the dining car. I'm guessing Saga and Ginger are still in bed; Effie should be waking them up soon. And my father is most likely out cold since he got drunk again last night, no surprise there.

I look out the window, by the looks of things we should be in the Capital by this afternoon. Then tributes get to meet their stylists and the victors have a get together thing. Which is good, I get to see Chaff, Seier, and everyone else. And that means Finnick too; I can't wait to see Finnick Odair. My best friend, well, more like my big brother, adopted of course.

I look over and see Saga walk in,

"Good morning" I greet him with a halfhearted smile; I never really smile since Peeta's death.

"Good morning, whats today's plans?" Saga asks in his deep voice.

"We should be in the Capital by noon, then you meet your stylists and they work on you until tonight when you have opening ceremonies."

Saga just nods as he starts to devour his plate of food before him. I go back to my own, eating it slowly. Soon enough Ginger walks in, she doesn't even say hello, just sees the food and starts to stuff her face right away.

My estimations are correct and we pull into the train station at noon. I stop our tributes right before we exit to go into the training tower, since Haymitch is in mega hangover and isn't much help.

"Ignore the cameras, don't look scared, they take note of that, they take note of everything, just keep walking and don't make eye contact with any of them or they'll pounce on you with questions." I say quickly.

"It sounds like we're going through a pack of wild dogs." Ginger laughs, I don't laugh back, "treat them like they are" I say before literally shoving the door open and bounding out. I motion for my tributes to stay close as I walk through the way cleared for us by peacekeepers to get inside. Many shouts are made out to me, I ignore them all, even the ones of "how are you doing without Peeta", I don't let those affect me; I have a job to do.

Once safely inside Effie takes over. She walks off with Saga and Ginger so they can go meet Cinna and Portia. Which just leaves Haymitch and I to go to the victor's room, at three, so I have three hours. I don't even say bye to my father cause he'll forget right after I tell him where I am going. I can't go outside, so I just go to the victor's room early.

I push open the door to find that the room is empty, good, I need time by myself. I go and sit on a couch that is placed in front of one of the many television screens throughout the room. I put my elbows on my knees and my face in my hands. I just close my eyes and sit there; I allow my tense muscles to relax slowly. Soon I fall asleep on the couch.

-Finnick:

I run to the elevator after the district four escort takes my tributes away to meet their stylists. I quickly press the four button and zoom upwards. I love being one of the first districts to arrive, and I love being the first person from my district to our floor. Now I get to pick my room, which I change every single year just to annoy our escort, Philia. She thinks we should use the same room every year, and I don't like her, so I don't listen to her rules.

I sprint down the hallway like a little kid and press the button on the outside of the door on the end of the hallway. It dispenses two keys for me to the room, one for me, and another, which is supposed to be spare, that I will give to Rachel. I quickly open the door and then fling the bag I was carrying onto the bed. There perfect, I go back outside and lock the door, now what?

I decide to go to the victor's room, maybe someone else will be there.

I'm delighted to see Rachel on one of the couches when I open the door, and I'm about to yell her name and run over when I realize she's asleep. Poor kid, she's had so much happen to her in the past year, and now she has to mentor. I walk over and slowly lift her up and sit down so she leans against me. Then I hold her there, comforting her. I guess she feels herself being moved because not even a minute later her eyes open. When they see my face I'm more than pleased with her reaction.

The light that has been gone since she became victor floods into her eyes and a huge smile crosses her face, an actual real smile. "Finnick!" She cheers like I'm the best Christmas present in the world and throws her arms around me. Then we just sit there for a while, arms wrapped around each other.

"I missed you" she whispers

"Missed you more" I tease back

"Impossible"

I laugh and pull her up, "Come on, I want to know everything's that's happened and you're not leaving out anything!" I say in a high pitched voice so I sound like a little girl and use pointless hand motions. Rachel bursts out laughing, "One, I haven't been this happy in a long time."

I put my hand under my chin and stare at her, "and twooooooo?" I ask in the same ridiculous voice as before. Her expression changes, like she's thinking something important over, she shakes her head.

"Nothing, nothing you should worry about." She grins, I shrug it off.

-Rachel:

I almost tell Finnick everything about Snow's visit. But I realize that knowing this could only hurt him, so I lie and say nothing else is wrong.

Other victors start to arrive once Finnick finishes telling me a story about how he wrestled with a shark, I go and hug Seeder and Seier, who arrive together even though they are from different districts. Within minutes all of my adopted family is there. I get a look at Enobaria, whose son I will be meeting at some point, she just gives me smug grins. That's great; she knows what's going on.

Haymitch spends his time drinking with Chaff, and soon even Finnick is drunk. As I sit by myself on a couch Brutus comes over, he grins.

"How's lover boy? Visited his grave recently?" He sneers.

"Every single day" I spit out, it's true, I do go every single day I can. I remember the first time I went:

*Flashback*

I sigh as I stand before the entrance to the graveyard of District Twelve's fallen tributes. Their all here, every one of them who didn't win. But I'm here to see one, one that reads, "Peeta Mellark: Strong until the end." Slowly I trudge through the graveyard, making my way towards the back where I know it will be.

I stop as I come before the square polished stone. Slowly I read the words aloud,

"Peeta Mellark: Strong until the end. Loving brother and friend, never forgotten. 3256-3272" I fall to my knees before the gravestone. It's too much to bear, knowing that the boy I still love is underneath me, buried, dead, cold, inside a nailed shut casket and the sword probably laid to rest beside him. I start thinking of an old song, it's sometimes sung at funerals. Never planned though, people say it's not appropriate unless the spouse of the dead is there. Peeta had no spouse, so it wasn't sung at his, and I wasn't there for his. I was either still in the arena or in the Capital. I take a shaky breath before I sing to him:

"_Deep in the meadow, under the willow  
>A bed of grass, a soft green pillow<br>Lay down your head, and close your eyes  
>And when again they open, the sun will rise<em>

_Here it's safe, here it's warm  
>Here the daisies guard you from every harm<br>Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true  
>Here is the place where I love you.<em>

_Deep in the meadow, hidden far away  
>A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray<br>Forget your woes and let your troubles lay  
>And when again it's morning, they'll wash away<em>

_Here it's safe, here it's warm  
>Here the daisies guard you from every harm<br>Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true  
>Here is the place where I love you"<em>

As I finished it started to drizzle, I heard footsteps and looked behind me.

"He loved that song you know" Quil Mellark, Peeta's brother tells me, I nod. Quil walks over and sits next to me; he puts his hands on my shoulders.

*Flashback End*

"That's great, I'm so proud of Cato still, he did a very good job." Brutus laughs, he can't even react as I slap him across the face. Pissed isn't even close to what Brutus looks like after I slap him. No, he's way passed pissed at me, more like he looks like he wants to rip my limbs off. The scary part is, he probably can.

I shoot up and make a break for the door before he grabs the back on my shirt and twists it so my air is blocked off. "Haymi-"I choke out; Brutus lifts me off the ground and twists his wrist so I look him in the eyes.

"You're a sorry excuse for a victor, aren't you?" he soothes as I feel my face changing colors. As a last ditch effort I spit in his face. I feel his massive hand slam into the side of my head and an instant later I'm thrown into the wall and crash to the floor.

I just lay there for a while, and when I look up I'm surprised to see Haymitch, Chaff, and Brutus in an all-out brawl.

I feel a hand on my shoulders and I flinch, expecting Enobaria or another Career to belt me one. But no, it's Finnick.

"We should get out of here" he whispers, I nod and we sneak out the door just as some peacekeepers file in.

The opening ceremonies are a success. Cinna and Portia worked their magic again and dressed our tributes as coals burning over a fire. The crowd loved them; even so, I sent them right off to bed after dinner.

I lightly finger the long scrap down the right side of my face where I collided with the wall. It hurts still, but not nearly as much as actually hitting the wall did. I grin as Finnick comes up and playfully swipes my hand away from my face.

"Come on, I want to talk." He says, he actually sounds serious, so I agree and follow him to the elevator. Once the doors close he presses something into my hand, "the key" he explains.

"Thanks, I'm glad you're still my friend"

"I'll always be your friend, no matter what."

As we reach the fourth floor Finnick leads me to his room and lets me inside, I plop myself down on his bed. Finnick locks the door then gets right to the point.

"Did Snow visit you, like, at home?"

I'm taken aback by the question. I want to tell Finnick, I really do, but I can't. I don't want him to get hurt; I don't want him to suffer because of me. So I lie once again to him.

"No? Was he supposed to?" I act surprised

Finnick comes over and kneels in front of me, "I know your lying to me, what did he say, he always comes to the new victors."

I can't hold his gaze, so I look down to the floor. "I can't tell you," I whisper. He lifts my chin gently so I have to look at him.

"Tell me" he urges.

"No Finn! I can't!" I burst out at him; he wraps his arms around me.

"Okay, then you don't have too" he sooths.

"How are the nightmares?" he changes the subject, I'm glad he does, I don't want to have to tell him about Zapher.

"They still come, every night." And that's true, they come, I wake up, tense with fear, then say 'that was scary' then I just sit and tell myself it's all just a dream, I tell myself they are dead, I did kill them, Peeta is dead, but they can't hurt me through dreams. Then I go back to sleep, just to be visited again.

"Then stay here" he whispers.

A few minutes later I lie in Finnick's bed while he turns out the light and removes his shirt. He crawls in next to me and wraps his arms around me. I always feel safer when he's protecting me from the nightmares.

"Night Finn"

"Goodnight."


	2. Chapter 2

-Rachel:

The next morning I congratulate Saga and Ginger as join our table on their performance, it was really good.  
>"Training starts today, just try and make friends" my father explains. I nod, agreeing with his point. An hour later Effie stands to take them off to training. I'm left alone with my father.<br>"So where were you last night? You never came to your room." he asks after a while.  
>"We were having like mad sex last night Haymitch, we really missed each other," I hear Finnick's voice behind me. Oh course he's kidding, we only sleep together, nothing more than that, Finnick just likes to joke that we have sex too.<br>My father's face goes red, "one day I'm just going to ruin your face over one of these jokes." he growls. Finnick puts his arms around me from behind, "who said they were jokes?" his semi-whispers into my ear, I know he wants Haymitch to hear. I burst out laughing, as Haymitches face contorts in some way out of rage.  
>Finnick takes this as his cue to leave and does with a promise to see me later. Haymitch just gets up and leaves going over to Chaff. God it's creepy how much time they spend together.<br>Someone taps me on the shoulder, I turn and see an avox standing before me with a slip of paper. I take it and dismiss her. I unwrap it and I catch my breath at the words written on it:  
>'Can you meet me tonight? I'll have a car pick you up behind the tower at four.<br>Love, Zapher'  
>so this is it? The start to my life with this Zapher boy. I guess so, I don't really have a choice now do I?<p>

*Flashback*

"Why are you here?" I ask the man sitting on my living room couch, in my house. The man is President Snow.

"Oh, I just made an arrangement so you can pass the time more quickly while you mentor" he tells me with a sly grin on his stupid face.

"wha-what arrangement?" I ask, I can hear Haymitch swearing at the peacekeepers who had literally dragged him out of the room earlier, so my conversation with Snow would be private.

"You get to spend private time with a friend of mine. He's your age of course. "

I'm still confused, "okay?" I ask

"Yes, his name is Zapher, he is Enobaria's son."

I literally feel my jaw drop as my mind makes the connection of what Snow means by "private time" with this Zapher.

"'.this" I growl

"Oh, but I can, and I am."

He leans closer so his face is right by mine; it smells of blood and roses. I don't hide the disgust on my face.

"That boy was right; you're too perfect not to be loved."

*Flashback end*

At four I go behind the training tower, to my hatred there is a car there, waiting for me. I climb in; the driver says nothing to me. No one else is in the car. I play with my pants, how long will they stay on? I should've worn a skirt or something so this could just be done and over with faster.  
>Sadly the building we go to isn't far away at all. I step out of the car and make my way inside. I trudge to the room that I was instructed to go to. I knock on the door and wait a while.<br>What if I just leave? Oh right, Snow will hurt my father, or chaff, or Finnick, or Seier, or anyone else really. A tall muscular black skinned boy answers the door. He smiles when he sees me,  
>"please, come in, let's talk" he smiles at me, he seems...friendly.<p>

I walk in and he closes the door behind me, I take a seat in a chair in the big room.  
>"First, I will never make you do anything you don't want," he tells me.<br>"What if I don't want to sleep with you?" I spit out at him.  
>"Then we won't do that, not until we're friends"<br>Friends! Friends! I'll never be friends with Zapher, but I just nod.  
>"So I'm Zapher, Enobarias son. I didn't grow up with her though, I live here in the Capital with my father" he tells me.<br>"You know about me"  
>He laughs, "yes I do, who doesn't?"<br>"good point"  
>Then, for the next two hours, we just talk. He doesn't even touch me. Not once. Maybe he isn't like I thought, maybe he is nice. He opens the door for me as I leave.<br>"Can I see you tomorrow?" he asks  
>"yeah sure." I shrug.<br>A smile spreads across his face, "thanks!" and then, he hugs me. I stiffen at first, but he loosens his hold so I relax a little.

The next day is training again for the tributes. So I have nothing to do really. I spend most of the day with Finnick until he says he has to go meet with some sponsors for his tributes. It doesn't make sense, but I nod and tell him I'll see him at dinner.  
>Once Finn is gone the same avox has before comes over and hands me a note, it tells me I will be picked up in the back in an hour. I go and change my clothes and shower.<p>

When Zapher opens the door I can feel something is wrong. As soon as he closes the door he's on me, hugging me, kissing me.  
>"Stop! What are you doing? You sai-" he cuts off my protests with a kiss.<br>"I lied, because I have to avenge my best friend's death in some way, don't I?" he sneers. I'm in shock at his words while he takes off his shirt and then my own.  
>"Cato?" I whisper.<br>"Exactly smart girl, he was my friend."  
>I go and slap Zapher across the face, he wastes no time in returning it, but ten times harder and bashing me into the wall. I feel the blood come out of a new cut on the backside of my head.<br>"Just relax" Zapher snaps as he keeps kissing me, my lips, my neck. He holds me in an iron grip, creating bruises all along my arms and shoulders.  
>Soon he throws me on the bed and is on top of me.<br>*ya you know what happens next*  
>my body aches, it kills, I'm disgusted with myself, terrified of Zapher. Every move of protest I had made had earned me a slap or a punch. Zapher made sure that only serious wounds would be covered, so no one else could tell the torture he put me through.<br>I slip out of bed and put on my pants. I walk to the bathroom and wash my hands. As I'm looking down at them I hear footsteps, a second later my face is driven forward and smashed into glass mirror, it shatters.  
>"I didn't give you permission to leave" Zapher snarls.<br>"I'm sorry" I mumble. He knees me in the back.  
>"Should be worthless whore" he goes and shoves me out of the bathroom. I go and put on my shirt. Then Zapher has me again and is kissing me again.<br>He shoves me away, "you weren't bad, and I'll see you soon. Get out!" he commands, shoving me at the door. I quickly get out; closing the door behind me I cover my bloody face from the world. Even though no one is around. The actual cuts are just above my hairline, so once they stop bleeding, they will be unnoticeable.

It takes all my will force not to sprint through the lobby of this sickening hotel. A car will be waiting for out back. I make my way out the back and jump into the car.  
>Soon we are back at the tower, where I don't hesitate to run to the elevator, slam my fist on the twelve button, and then sprint to the bathroom in my room and lock myself inside. I have an hour before dinner, an hour to get the bleeding to stop.<br>I turn on the shower and step in; every muscle in my body resists movement, every muscle protests. I watch as the water mixed with blood goes down the drain. I retch as I think of what just happened, how I got these bruises, these injuries, these scars.  
>After I shower I go and press towels to my forehead until I get the bleeding to stop, then comb my hair so it covers whatever could be visible.<p>

I'm super self-conscious as I step into the dining area. Pain floods my body, but I make it to my table and sit down. I greet my father and tributes with a smile. I eat slowly as we plan what to do for private sessions; I let Haymitch do most of the talking.  
>I feel someone watching me, when I look I see Finnick. He smiles; I grin and look away quickly. I can't hold anyone's gaze; I'm focused on the pain, on trying to not let it show.<br>After the tributes go to bed Haymitch goes over to see Chaff. So I'm left to finish my dinner.  
>I feel hands go on my shoulders; I stiffen, my eyes widen in pain and fear. My body expecting to be shoved into the table, or into a wall, or used. I start to shake slightly, the hands immediately go off.<br>"Come with me now!" Finnick commands from behind me. He's never talked to me like this; I've never heard this tone from him. It's furious, scared, demanding. I nod and stand.  
>Finnick takes my hand and starts for the elevator, I stiffen as I walk, then Finnick picks me up and carries me the rest of the way.<p>

Once we are in his room he places me on his bed.  
>"WHAT HAPPENED!" he orders. I start to shake slightly, "nothing Finn it's,"<br>"No! This!" he motions to me, "is not nothing! You're terrified, you almost fainted when I touched you, you barely ate, and you avoid eye contact with anybody! And you're in serious pain," he yells.  
>I rub my forehead like I do when I'm stressed, but it opens the wounds on my forehead. Finnick's eyes widen as he sees the blood come down over my face. He runs and grabs a towel and puts it to my forehead. He sits there, shaking his head, until it stops.<br>"Show me!" he demands after. I nod, knowing now I have to tell him, and lift the hair off my forehead. I know he sees the cuts.  
>"What else?" he whispers.<br>I roll up the sleeves on my shirt to show the long bruises. Then I unbutton my shirt and turn around, so he can see the gashes from my body being slammed against the bed frame. The bruises on my hips, and then finally, after I put my shirt back on, I show him the gash on the back of my head, under my hair.  
>When I turn around its Finnick who is shaking.<br>"What did they do to you?" he asks slowly.

-Finnick:

I want to kill whoever did this to her. How did they do this to her? How could someone do this to her in such a short amount of time? She was fine this morning, fine when I left her, fine when she said see you at dinner. But now? Now she's a wreak.

"What did they do to you?" I ask slowly.

She just stares at me, like I'll hurt her if she tells me the truth.

"God Rachel! Tell me the fucking truth so I can help you!" I yell at her, tears roll slowly down my face.

"He sold me to him" she whispers. No, no he didn't. She's only fifteen, right; I was only fifteen when he first sold me to those women. He still does too. I just shake my head; she seems to understand and explains further.

"He sold me to Zapher, Enobaria's son, he was Cato's best friend, he said he'll make me suffer for what I did. He said that we get to have fun every night he wants."

-Rachel:

"Why you? Why to him?" he says in shock, I start to cry here, giving into the pain.

"Because they got the idea when Peeta said I'm too perfect not to be loved!" I shout at him.

"I'm gunna kill that bastard." Finnick murmurs.

"No! You can't! If you do Snow will hurt someone else, he said he'll hurt someone I love if I don't cooperate."

Finnick swears again under his breath then puts his hands on my shoulders, I stiffen. He goes to push the hair back out of my face and I instantly pull away, ready to be slapped, hit, or punched in the face again.

"You need to know one thing." He whispers

I nod slowly.

"I will never hurt you. Never." He promises me, hearing the words make me relax as I nod to him.

"and you need to tell me everything that happens okay? I just want you to be you again, like we were before."

"I'm never going to be like I was before Finn" I say bluntly as I stand and walk around him.

"Where are you going?"

"I'd rather sleep alone, don't you worry though, I won't be in bed alone tomorrow." I snap at him, I can tell he's pissed. I've never pissed off Finnick before. Seeing we've been friends for six years, I should get a national award or something. Before I walk out I turn to him, he's just standing in front of his bed.

"You should understand Finnick; you went in there once too. It may seem like it, but I'm not some strong fifteen year old girl. I'm terrified and weak, and sometimes, I'd rather be dead than see those faces when I sleep again." Then I walk out, leaving Finnick alone with his mouth hanging open, his face red with rage.

-Finnick:

"Where are you going?" I ask as she walks past me.

"I'd rather sleep alone, don't you worry though, I won't be in bed alone tomorrow." She snaps at me. I stand, my hands go into fists and I clench my jaw. So this is what they've made her? A pissed and arrogant girl. She stops and turns to me,

"You should understand Finnick; you went in there once too. It may seem like it, but I'm not some strong fifteen year old girl. I'm terrified and weak, and sometimes, I'd rather be dead than see those faces when I sleep again."

My jaw drops, one she called me Finnick, she never does. Two, does she think I'm so strong; sure the nightmares don't come often for me. No I'm not that strong! As she walks out the door I go in the doorway and yell at her as she walks to the elevator.

"You know what! I have nightmares too! I don't let them get to me though! I don't let them bother me do I? No I put that hellhole behind me, it's the past!"

She spins around on her heel and stares at me, eyes wide, tears in them.

"YOU DIDN'T HOLD THE BOY YOU LOVE AS HE DIES! YOU DIDN'T SIT THERE AND KNOW IT WAS YOUR FAULT HE'S DYING!" she yells at the top of her lungs, I'm pretty sure everyone can hear her. She flips me off and then storms off and slams her fist on the elevator button. And she's gone. And I can still hear her crying as the elevator goes up.


	3. Chapter 3

-Rachel:

The next morning I sit at our table in the dining room with Saga and Ginger.

"Now remember, impress the gamemakers, surprise them." I instruct.

"Yes, if you give them something that will make them think you can actually give them a good show, than you'll get a higher score." Haymitch backs up my statement

"A good show?" Ginger repeats.

"Yeah, that's what this is, a show. A deadly television show for their entertainment." My father snaps, I know how strongly he feels about this. So when Saga and Ginger look to me, I grin and nod.

"It's a fucking entertainment show." I agree.

"That's reassuring." Saga laughs, I smile at him.

"Sure is."

As my tributes are taken back for their private sessions I decide to go for a walk. I have time, after sessions they go directly to stylists to get prepped for interviews. And I'm not due to see Zapher until after interviews tonight. Before I walk out I take Haymitch's knife that he always carries. I think I know why he always has it now, but now I need one. I put the long bladed knife in my back pocket and walk out into the busy streets of the Capital.

My shirt covers the knife, so I don't need to worry about being stopped by peacekeepers. Hopefully I can make it to the library before someone with a camera shows up.

Luckily I do, I go to the top floor of the library, no one else really goes up here. It was always one of my favorite places. I go and sit down on a leather couch and sink into it. Wonderful, now I finally get to be alone without any chance that another victor will find me. Really Finnick is the only other victor who's been up here, and we're still pissed at each other, so he won't be coming. That's good, cause I'm not talking to him for a while.

I end up taking out the knife and running the flat side of the blade along my hands. It's a very nice knife really. The hand carved wooden handle has intricate designs on it, apparently Haymitch did it himself. The blade is five inches long and is serrated just along the tip. It could do a lot of damage, if I wanted it to, but to someone who doesn't know how to properly use a knife to kill someone, it would be worthless.

I'm not sure how long I really stay up in the attic of the library, but when I make it back to the tower, it's almost time for interviews. I go off and find Saga and Ginger sitting at a table by themselves, I invite myself over and take a seat between them.

"So, Saga I think it will be better for you if you appear tough, you can pull that off." I'm more telling him than suggesting this.

He just nods.

"Ginger, appear, oh I don't know, how about humble?"

"Humble?" she clearly has never heard this word before.

"Yes, like you can't believe you're here and you just love everything about the Capital." I hear my father say from behind. I get up and give him a hug, slipping the knife back into his pocket. He grins; "thanks" he knows I put his knife back.

"Anytime" I grin.

"Okay, I guess I can do that." Ginger says with confidence, I feel really bad that by this time tomorrow she will most likely just be dead.

"Good, I'll leave you guys with Haymitch, I've got to change." I stand up and make my way to the elevator.

Once I'm in my room I find a dress laid out on the bed, there's a note with it.

"Thought I'd help you out, I miss not being your stylist. ~Cinna"

I smile as I slip into the silky black dress. Accents of red and gold run down the sides, it could be seen as just a beautiful dress. But it can also be looked at as a dress of someone still mourning the loss of someone they love.

I sit next to Haymitch as the lights dim down and Caesar Flickerman takes the stage for interviews to begin. Haymitch puts one hand on my leg, I don't flinch away, this is how we're supposed to look when we sit together in the Capital. Like the famous father-daughter victor pair. I feel a pair of eyes on me and look to see Finnick watching me, I scowl at him and refocus my attention back to the stage, where the girl from District One has taken the spotlight.

I barely listen to any of the interviews, I'm mostly counting on Effie to take notes, she did last year, and the year before that, and the year before that. But I do make note of the boy from five; he looks deadly and earned himself an eleven in training.

Than Ginger walks out onto the stage, looking stunning in a red dress that matches her hair color. She plays her act of appearing humble perfectly, but she will not be remembered, only earning a six in training. I had been hoping for at least a seven.

Than Saga walks out, gasps from the crowd. Portia has made him look absolutely stunning, handsome, and deadly. His black suit makes his shoulders look even broader than they are, and he stands way taller than Caesar. He doesn't smile, not once during his interview. He responds with yes and no answers, but he lets a small grin cross his face when they announce his score of ten. _Yes Saga, you will get sponsors if you survive the bloodbath._ I think hopefully. I just hope he does survive the next day.

Three hours later I walk back into the training tower, I cradle my arm. Zapher twisted it; it had felt like he was going to snap it off. I had been used again, and I felt sick, I felt like a slut. I wince as I try and straiten my arm to press the elevator button; I end up just using my other arm. I look behind me, feeling I'm being watched.

Finnick sits in a chair, the back propped up in a darker corner of the room where I wouldn't see him when I walked in. He watches me; I give him the death stare and lift up the side of my shirt, revealing a long black bruise with a cut at the top, blood slowly streams out from it.

His eyes widen, I cover it back up as a ding tells me the elevator is here. I'm still mad at Finnick, furious at him. For thinking that I can just put the past in the past. No, I can't, and every time with Zapher will remind me, every time that boy grabs me and uses me. I shudder as his voice comes back to me with what he said before letting me go.

_I have some friends who would love to meet you. Maybe I'll let them get to know you, I mean, they knew Cato as well._

I don't want to meet his friends, because I know they're bitches, like him. I know they'll use me, like he does.

I go right to my room and turn on the shower. I put my arm underneath the warm water and let it soak, slowly the muscles relax and I can move my arm with only a little pain. I stand under the warm running water, letting it soak through my clothes and wash away the blood. _I hate sex. _ I decide, it's painful, it hurts, and I feel like it'll kill me.

After I get out of the shower and change I climb into my bed. That's when the door opens, I watch as a figure comes in and sits on the bed.

"I don't want to talk to you." I grumble, thinking it's Finnick since he's the one who has the extra key to my room.

"Oh, sorry" Haymitch says

"Oh, no stay, I thought you were Finnick." I quickly apologize and sit up in bed.

"That's one of the things I wanted to talk to you about, what happened? You didn't talk to each other at all, and you just kept giving him death glares."

"We just had a fight."

"Over what?"

"Nothing big," I lie

"Rachel, of course it's big, you've talked to Finnick every second you can for the past six years of your life and now you don't even smile at him. What was it about?"

"The Games, he said to put it behind me, that the past is the past. But he doesn't understand I can't do that! I killed people, I murdered people. When I told him that he still said I should just pretend it never happened. But I can't do that either because of Peeta." My voice cracks as I explain and I feel Haymitch's arms go around me gently.

"I know, he just wants to see the old you again, but that will never happen, not completely." Haymitch understands, of course he does, he always understands me.

"What was the other thing you wanted to talk about?" I ask softly

Haymitch gets right to the point, "You realize they both could be dead tomorrow."

"Yeah, I know, Ginger will be, Saga, well I don't know about him."

"Good, sleep well okay?"

"I'll try too."

-Finnick:

He hurt her. Not as bad as before but he did. I can't believe he did, how can he hurt her, does he even have a soul?

I lay in bed thinking all of these things. She's still mad at me, no, she's still furious at me, for what I said. After thinking about it I understand that she was right, she always is. She can't forget those Games; she would rather die than forget that boy.

I shudder as I think of what tomorrow holds for me. My tributes, who are both surely bloodbath deaths, will go into the arena and die. Then, at night, I get to go to that hotel. Sleep with some rich Capital woman, why? Because I have too, just like Rachel does. Only with me it's a different person every time. It's not so bad anymore for me; I guess I would be used to it after nine years of forced prostitution.

I wish I could help her, protect her from Zapher. If I could, I'd kill him. But then that would only hurt her in the end too, and that can't happen. I care about her, a lot. I picture her face in my head and I feel the smile that spreads across my face. That's when it hits me, things change, I know that.

But now I realize. I do love her, I do love her. I love her more than I did before. I love her as a person now, I want to hold her, hug her, kiss her even. She means more to me than just an adopted sister. She means the world.


	4. Chapter 4

Rachel:

I wait in my designated corner of the dining room. Saga comes over; Ginger goes over to my father. There's a new drill this year, tributes get an hour to talk with their mentors before they leave. I get Saga for half an hour, then I get to say bye to Ginger.

I take Sagas hand in both of mine.  
>"You're a fighter Saga, you can go far, you could win, if you really put your mind to it." I tell him, it's awkward since he's two years older than I am, but he doesn't seem to mind.<p>

"What should I do first?" he asks

"Get a good weapon, get a pack. Than run for it, don't look back. And don't take part in the bloodbath, you kill someone you're an instant target."

"you took part" he points out; I swallow the lump that comes to my throat.

"I had other motives" I simply say. "I didn't plan to win, but others had different plans"

He just nods, his next question surprises me.  
>"What's it like? To kill a person?"<p>

"much the same as killing an animal, the way you do it is no different. But after, that's totally different, they don't leave you, ever." I say calmly.

"Then how do you do it?"

"just let the arena take you for that fight, forget their a person, forget they think, forget they have a family back home, just become wild. That's how you win; that's what a victor is. Someone who could let themselves become one with the arena, let their instincts take over, let themselves become wild. But then be able to come back to themselves. Don't lose yourself. Don't let them take your spirit."

"thank you" he whispers, our half an hour together is over.

"Good luck Saga" I tell him, what I do next even surprises me. I put my hands on the side of his head and kiss both of his cheeks.  
>"Stay alive, that's your final advice" I grin. He stands and hugs me.<br>"thanks" he tells me  
>"no problem Saga, now scram"<br>He laughs and then goes over to Haymitch as Ginger comes to me.

She's nervous, clearly.  
>"I'm scared" she admits right away.<p>

"I'd think you crazy if you weren't"

"that's good, so, what should I do first?" she asks

"whatever my father told you"

"okay. He said get a pack if I think I can, than clear out and find water." she informs me.

"Than do that"  
>There's a few minutes of silence.<br>"Do you have any letters?" I ask her. She nods and takes them out of her pocket.

She hands them to me; "I'll deliver them if I need too" I smile, not saying that I'm sure I will deliver these last goodbyes to those she loves.

"Did you write letters?" she asks

"yes, a lot of them" I remember that night on the train.

"To who?" she asks.

"Haymitch, the other victors, some old friends back home, and Peeta."

"old friends?" she asks confused. "Aren't you popular as a victor?"

"hell no, most of my friends either are scared of me, or their parents don't want them to hang out with me" I sigh.

"But you're not bad at all" she says gently

"thank you, that's, the nicest thing anyone's said to me in a while," I take her hands in mine. I see the other tributes going off to their stylists, who will be with them until launch.

"Cinna will take care of you until launch, remember, he cares, and we're all cheering for you." I smile at her. We both stand; I put my hands on both sides of her head gently and kiss her forehead.

"If you can, find Saga, he'll help you." I whisper.

"Thank you" she whispers, her voice cracks and I see a tear roll down her face. I wipe it away, "no crying, you don't want to seem weak" I tell her. She nods and hugs me. I wrap my arms around her.

Then I stand side by side with Haymitch, Saga and Ginger, along with all the other tributes, turn around to face us before going through the doors to the hovercrafts that will take them away. Simultaneously all of the victors in the room, including Haymitch and I, put three fingers to our lips and extend them to the tributes. The tributes all bow their heads, and then turn around, walk through the door, and are gone.

I watch from the couch as the screen shows the tributes rise into the arena. We all get our first look at it.

"Holy shit! What the hell is that!" I yell aloud, Haymitch pats my back. The arena mostly is normal, from what the tributes can see.  
>But there's a large river that runs through the whole arena. Various points hold whirlpools, at the end, a massive waterfall that drops hundreds of feet to sharp rocks below. Going in the river completely means certain death.<p>

"Ladies and gentlemen welcome to the Seventy third Hunger Games!" Claudius Templesmith booms. I shudder; I haven't heard those words since it was me standing on one of those metal plates.  
>Sixty seconds, that's how long we have until 'play' begins, until innocent kids are murdered.<p>

"What if we got them out?" I whisper.

"What!" Haymitch looks at me surprised.

"What if we broke them outta there somehow?" I ask

"impossible" he shrugs. I guess it is, where would we take them?

"Begin!" Claudius announces as the gong sounds and the tributes sprint off of their plates. I watch in utter horror as Ginger hesitates and is last to leave. Ninety-five percent of the time the last to leave the plate dies as one of the first.

Ginger is no exception, I feel the blood rush out of my face as a Career takes his sword and decapitates my tribute. Boom! The cannon fires, it shows her face, a smile of her lips. The career stabs her body again, then takes off to go find his next victim.  
>Now is not the time to mourn for her. Saga is still alive, he's doing just as I told him, he has a pack, weapons, and is off running through the dense woods.<br>"Good boy Saga," I mutter.  
>Haymitch nods next to me, clearly unphased by Gingers death; we knew she was a bloodbath. I still have her letters in my pocket.<br>Saga seems safe, for now, so I stand and go over to the mailing station.  
>"Put these with my tribute" I instruct as I slide the letters across the countertop. The avox on the over side nods and goes off to do what I instructed.<p>

Before I turn another avox comes and hands me a note, it says I am to meet with Zapher tonight at six. Wonderful, I get to see the bitch. I tear up the note and trash it, I will be there though.  
>I see Finnick watching me; I just glance at him, than look away.<p>

-Finnick:

I wanted run to her when I saw what that boy did to Ginger. I had looked seen her face turn white. But she didn't scream, she didn't do anything really. I watch her as she goes over to mail the letters Ginger wrote back home. She glances at me, than looks away. It kills me inside; she's still angry at me, she has every right to be.

Later I leave to go to the hotel for another 'meeting', I hate them. Even more so now that I know Rachel goes through it too. It's harder for her, because she fights it. I just let it happen, this way I don't get hurt.

I slip out of bed, leaving a rather ugly lady alone and walk downstairs. I'm about to walk out when I turn, hearing a pair of feet pummel down the stairs, no one takes the stairs. My eyes widen as Rachel bursts out into the lobby in nothing but her bra and shorts. A muscular black boy follows her and roughly grabs her shoulder, I stiffen.

"I don't have to with you friends bitch!" she yells in the boys, who I'm guessing is Zapher, face. Zaphers eyes widen in anger, I snap at what he does next.  
>He grabs her shoulders and, without hesitation, he knees her in the gut, making her double over. Then he brings his fist hard down between her shoulder blades. She falls to her knees and he slaps her across the face.<br>I run over and punch Zapher right in the face.

"Finn stop" I hear her mumble, I don't stop, no one treats _my_ girl like that.  
>Zapher goes to punch me, I easily grab his wrist, which makes me realize. Rachel doesn't fight him, she lets him do this, she could easily stop him. I twist his arm until his back faces me. I kick him in the ass and then shove him into the wall as hard as I can. There's a cracking as bones and plaster break.<br>Zapher falls to the floor and I give him one last kick, "asshole" I spit at him.  
>I go and pick up Rachel, her face has begun to swell. She wraps her arms around my neck.<br>"Thank you Finn" she cries into me, I can feel her body heat on me. Surprisingly it doesn't bother me seeing her in basically just her underwear.  
>"Anytime" I tell her. She's asleep in my arms by the time we get to the car.<p>

-Rachel:

I wake up, then panic when I feel arms around me. How did I end up back with Zapher? I start to get up.  
>"Stay," a voice moans. I instantly stop moving and settle back into the arms, they belong to Finnick.<p>

"Always will" I whisper.

"Good" he says sleepily, he tucks me closer to him. That's when I remember I don't have a shirt on, oh well; I'll have to borrow one of Finnick's tomorrow morning. I relax in Finnick's arms.

"Finn?" I ask

"yeah?"

"Sorry I've been so mean to you"

"its okay, you were right, it's harder for you" his answer surprises me.

I drop the conversation there and settle back into his arms. Knowing they would never hurt me, they only mean comfort. They mean safety.

Finnick wakes me up early the next morning.

"Do you want to go watch?" he asks.

"Yeah, Saga is still alive," I nod and climb out of bed. Crap, I don't have a shirt.

"Ugh Finn?"

"yea?" he turns to face me.

"Can I borrow a shirt?"  
>He grins at me and goes over and grabs one of his own from a drawer and tosses it at me.<br>"Thanks" I thank him as I put it on.

When we walk into the victor's room together I immediately decide that wearing Finnick's shirt wasn't a good idea. Everyone stares at us, they raise eyebrows.

"That's an odd way to settle a fight, but I guess it works" Brutus sneers, clearly suggesting that I slept with Finnick last night, well, that we did more than sleep. Which we did, just not with each other.

I go and sit next to my father, Finnick takes the empty spot next to me.  
>"How's he doing?" I ask<p>

"see for yourself" my dad motions to the side screen that will always show Saga. He's on the move, and he's eating. But as I look at the other screens I notice the Careers are hunting and their coming closer to Saga. I want to yell at Saga to run, to move faster before the Careers get to him.

-Saga:

I trudge through the forest as I chew on a fish I caught. The water has an unbelievably strong current, but I managed to get a fish.  
>I'm glad I've made it to the second day of the Games. There's only eighteen players left now.<br>Ginger was killed yesterday, which my only thought was its good I didn't talk to her much that would've made things harder. But still, she was from home.

As I come to a clearing a hear a branch crack, weird I didn't step on one. I whirl around to see the whole Career pack barreling towards me. I take out one of my knives and hurl it at the District One girl. It lodges into her stomach but she just grins.  
>After I stand there in shock, I'm going to die, I'm going to die.<br>I feel the sword pierce through my body; I feel it be pulled out. Boom! I wonder who that could be for.  
>I feel arms go around me gently.<p>

"Your safe now, no more worries" I hear a boy say. I turn my head, and see Peeta Mellark.

-Rachel:

I bury my face into Haymitch as Sagas cannon goes off. His arms go around me, Finnick pats my back.

"I'm sorry" he tells both of us.

"Oh well, he was going to get killed sooner or later" Haymitch grumbles. Get killed. Without comment I stand up and walk over to the phone. I dial a number quickly.

"Hello?" a voice answers.

"Can you tell Snow I'd like to meet with him, to talk about something?" I ask.

"Yes, we were going to send for you, someone will come and show you the way."

"Thank you." I say before I hang up. I feel arms go around me in a warm embrace.

"Hey Finn," I say softly.

"Hey, why do you want to see Snow?"

"I want to see if I can go home, just for Friday, just so I can, you know." I don't want to say it aloud that I want to visit Peeta the day it's been a year without him.

"I understand, want me to come too? In case, you need someone to explain for you?"

I just nod. A minute later someone comes over and tells me to follow, Finnick follows us too. Damn I feel like I have a bodyguard.

When we arrive at the door the guard pokes his head in to ask Snow if Finnick can also come in. Apparently Snow agrees because we are both told to go in. We take seats in front of the huge desk that Snow sits behind. Peacekeepers stand along the walls, and the flag of the Capital is draped behind Snow.

"Hello, now let's get right to business. Would you like to speak first or shall I?" Snow inquires.

"I want to go back to Twelve, just for Friday, just so I can" I stop, a lump forming in my throat.

"So she can visit him." Finnick finishes for me.

"Ahh yes, I'm sure that can be arranged, you can leave Thursday night and come back Saturday morning. And Mr. Odair, that was quiet a stunt you pulled last night, beating up Zapher like that. So Rachel, to continue your, shall we say, services. You now will be open to anyone who wants to, you know, spend an evening with you." Snow grins at us.

I feel my face go white. "But, they'll, they'll kill me" I stutter.

"No, not if you do it right. So if this is settled, I believe you two can go." He smiles and we stand. Finnick leans over to me, "I want to ask him something, I'll meet you out there soon" he whispers in my ear. I nod as I'm lead out.

A few minutes later Finnick comes out, he looks, almost happy, but scared too.

"You okay Finn?" I ask him

"Yeah, I'm fine, let's go back."

-Finnick:

I think about what I just did as we sit in the victor's room and focus on the Games.

I asked Snow if I could go to Twelve also, just to make sure she didn't hurt herself. He agreed to that, so I get to go to Twelve now. I want to thank Peeta anyways. The other thing I did, oh I feel like she'll either love me for it or hate me for it. Is I bought her for the next week. For the three days until Friday and then until the Tuesday after that, she'll be safe with me.

I just will have a lot of quick explaining to do when she opens the room door and I'm in there. I'm not going to have sex with her. Hell no, I mean, like, I would, no, yes, no, wait. No, what am I saying? I won't use her, there, I just bought her so she won't get hurt for a while. Yeah. I'm protecting her, cause that's what I do, I protect her.


	5. Chapter 5: Back Home

-Rachel:

I cringe as another cannon goes off and Haymitch rubs my back.

"They really want these Games to last a long time" I comment

"Ya, people didn't like how short they were last year."

"Oh course they didn't, cause it's not bad enough that all of those kids died." I spit back.

"Yeah, there sixteen left now, last year there were about eight."

"I know, I was there." I point out.

Chaff laughs, he's drunk, of course, so is Haymitch, but not as bad.

"Shut up Chaff" Ceier rolls her eyes, Haymitch laughs and smiles at her. I think he likes Ceier.

I glance at the clock, it's almost six, I need to go. Back to the hell hotel.

"I'm going to go for a walk." I lie.

"Have fun" my father tells me, I don't let my mental scream come out. Oh I won't have fun, but whoever bought me will. I look to say bye to Finnick, but he's not here. I guess he got called off, he told me they do the same to him. I had cried for him, but he said you get used to it after a few years. That the first year is the hardest.

I go upstairs and change, than back outside and into the car waiting outside.

"Hello Ryan" I greet my regular car driver, we're actually pretty friendly with each other, he's a nice guy.

"Hello Rachel" he greets me back.

When we pull up he tells me to be careful, yeah, I can't do that, but I thank him anyways, it's the thought that counts.

I knock on the door to my regular room that I go to and wait. The door opens and I almost drop dead right there in the hall.

"You bit-" I start but Finnick quickly covers my mouth with his hand and pulls me gently inside. He leads me down and sits me in a chair.

"Let me explain." He says while taking his hand off my mouth. I call him every bad thing I know, which is a lot since he taught me himself, until he stuffs a pillow in my mouth.

"I did this so you wouldn't have to, you're safe until next week, every night for a week it's just me, and we can just talk. Snow just said we have to come here, I lied to him, told him I did want you. I don't, just protecting you." He gets it out quickly. I just stare at him, my eyes wide as I process what he's telling me. Then I throw my arms around his next and start to cry, tears of joy.

"You're the best, you know that? The very best, I love you Finn."

"I figured" he shrugs through my hug. I hit him playfully, "shut up"

"What would we do if we don't talk?" he asks raising his eyebrows at me.

"Good point" I look up at him, since I'm still hugging him. That's when I really see his face for the first time. Like, actually see what it looks like. His strong features, his jawline, his bronze hair, his sea-green eyes. He's handsome, very. He might be the handsomest person I've ever seen.

"You have pretty eyes, you know that?" I tell him.

"Wow, if that was a come-on then it sucked." He laughs.

"It was an observation dumbo" I tease

"Did you know that the civilization before us made a movie in which dumbo was a freakishly large elephant with gigantic ears that made it fly?" He asks in a smart-ass tone.

"Reallyyyyyyyyy?" I inquire

"Yes" he grins.

We lie on the bed together two hours later still, thankfully fully clothed. Then something hits me, what will happen, when Finnick leaves? I'll go home, he will go to Four. I'll be alone, again. I look up at him, he's still watching me, a smile on his face.

"Finn?"

"Yeah."

"Don't leave me" I tell him

"What?" he doesn't understand

"Promise me, that you won't go and get yourself killed or anything. Cause, if I lose you, I don't know what I'd do" I fumble with my hands like I always do when I'm embarrassed. I feel Finnick's hand goes under my chin so I have to look him in the eyes, his wonderful eyes.

"I will never, never leave you" he says seriously.

-Finnick:

"I will never, never leave you" I tell her, she smiles at me. Damn, I want to kiss her, so bad I do, but I know I can't. Not here, not in this room were so many bad memories are for her. And not now, when the force of Peeta's death is getting stronger the closer it comes to being a year without him.

She's different, that much is certainly clear. Not once have we done a prank, not once has she had that amazing glint of light in her eyes. Sure, sometimes it's there, but never fully, never for more than a couple of seconds. Then the weight of her depression comes crashing down on her again.

I pull her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her.

"Why would I leave you?" I ask

"I don't know"

"Exactly, there is no reason, every year we'll both come back to mentor, every year I promise I'll be here for you."

-Rachel:

Twenty-four hours later the hovercraft touches down in Twelve, I hop out and make my way across the yard into my house. I wish someone came with me; it'll be a lonely night all by myself in this big house. And I feel bad, I looked for Finnick before I left but couldn't find him anywhere.

I stop by the phone and dial the number to our room back in the Capital.

"Hellooooooooo?" my drunken father answers; he had to stay back, because there has to be a Twelve mentor there.

"Hi Dad, I just got in."

"Oh, good, call me before you leave too kay?"

"Got it, wait, lik-"

"HEYYY RACHEL!" a different voice screams, I hear Haymitch swearing and other laughing.

"Hi Chaff, can I talk to Haymitch again you drunken bastard?" I laugh

"Well fine then" Chaff answers sadly

"Sorry" Haymitch mumbles.

"So like call right when I'm leaving the house?" I finish my question

"Ya, sure call then"

"Okay, bye then, love you"

"Love you too Rach" he says then there's a tone as the call in ended.

Later that night, after crying for about three hours, there's a knock at the door. I go over and answer it, Quil Mellark, Peeta's older brother, stands there. I greet him with a half-hearted smile. He sees my face, which is still red and marked by tears, and opens his arms. I go into them and allow him to comfort me. Quil smells like Peeta did freshly baked bread and dough. The smell brings even more tears to my eyes.

"We need to move on Rachel, we all do" he whispers, I just nod. "I know it's harder for you, maybe the hardest, even harder than my parents, because they've had something to keep them busy." He adds.

"I just, I just miss every second, of every day, so much" I sob. Quil strokes my back, he doesn't say a word, we just stand there.

"We used to tease him you know, we could tell he loved you, we teased him for being a wimp and not just asking you out already" Quil laughs at the memory, he doesn't seem sad, he seems happy about Peeta's death.

"Why are you happy?" I ask a little pissed at Quil. He steps back from our hug and puts his hands on my shoulders and looks me in the eyes.

"Look at it this way; he's free now. He doesn't have to obey any laws; he doesn't have to deal with peacekeepers or anything. He can do whatever he wants. And I bet he's painting millions and millions of pictures while he waits for you. Don't cha think?

I nod, it is better to look at it that way. Peeta has no troubles now, as I realize this, as I embrace this new realization, it feels like a weight has been lifted off of me. "I bet he is" I smile, an actually, real smile, I can picture Peeta being given a set of real paints and how he would be ecstatic about it. How that's all he would be talking about for weeks. "Thanks Quil"

"No problem, so I'll see you tomorrow?" he inquires

"Ya, I'll be there all day, when are you all going?" I ask

"Oh, sometime around ten" he shrugs.

"Okay, see you then" I nod to him; he hugs me one last time and tells me to stay strong and remember what he told me.

Seeing him walk away, I allow myself for a second to remember how that's Peeta looked when he left here. Every day I saw him leave, every day I wondered what it would be like if he didn't have to leave.

-Finnick:

I'm hoping this plan works. I've just arrived in District Twelve, which is super tiny compared to my home district. It smells of wood and pine too, and coal dust, lots of coal dust. I easily find Victor's Village. I go into the house that doesn't have any lights on. Rachel's in that one and I want to surprise her by showing up tomorrow. As I pass the house I stop, I hear her crying. I almost go and bolt to her, throw my arms around her and tell her everything will be alright. But I don't, because it's her time to mourn, and everything won't be alright, nothing can be "all right" in Panem.

I go into the house and drop my bag on the floor, I instantly go to sleep. Tomorrow I'll go visit Peeta, tomorrow I will, and I'll stay there all day long with her. So she has a shoulder to cry on.

-Rachel:

Even with Quil's advice in my head I can't help the depression and sadness that overwhelms me. Everything I see in the house brings back memories of him. _He stood here. He ate dinner with Haymitch and I almost every night here. _ And in my bedroom more memories. _He would come through that window to see if I was alright at night. He would lie on that spot on the bed and stay until I fell asleep. He drew that pattern on my wall one day while it was raining. _

Everything reminds me of him, everything brings pain. I cry myself to sleep that night, only to relive when I held him while he died in my arms.


	6. Chapter 6: Anniversary part one

-Rachel:

I wake up from my nightmare around three in the morning. I'm not going to go back to sleep, not if I'll see the faces again. So I decide I'll watch the sunrise with Peeta today, like we used to do. I slide out of bed and dress myself in jeans and a T-shirt Peeta gave me for my fifteenth birthday two years ago. Two years ago. Was he really here then? It seems like it's been forever without him.

I make my way through the Seam in the darkness; I have to pass through it to get to the graveyard. It doesn't scare me like it does some of the merchant children. I like it, something about the coal dust on the road, the rickety houses, and the overall feel of it comforts me. I walk under the archway into the graveyard and make my way to Peeta; I could find him with my eyes closed and ears blocked.

I sit down next to the stone, not on top of him, just next to him. I will be able to see the sun rising perfectly, Peeta must love it, getting to see it every day.

"Hey Peeta, I love you" I grin and pat the ground. As I stare at the ground where my hand is a tear falls to it. Then another, and another, I just miss him so much.

Two hours later the first rays of light land softly on Peeta and I. A soft breeze goes against me, it brushes my lips. I smile; it's moist, but warm, almost like a kiss from Peeta himself. I bring my knees to my chest and allow myself to pretend Peeta is right there next to me, his arm around me. I raise my arm and point to the sunrise.

"There it is Peeta, your favorite color. You love it so much, since it's the perfect balance of red and yellow. Since it's only able to be seen for a short while before it disappears again. Before it fades and gives way to a new day."

Sure enough, a little while later the color disappears, fades away. I can see the people of the Seam are just getting up, the miners. They have to be in the mines in a little less than an hour. I notice one figure turn and walk under the arch to the graveyard; he makes his way towards us. When he's a few hundred yards away I recognize who it is; Gale Hawthorne. We're friends now, kind of. He was one of the only people near my age who would talk to me when I first got back from the Games, he and his girlfriend, Katniss.

"Hi Gale" I greet him as he comes up. He smiles at me, he doesn't smile much, so it makes me feel special, makes me feel like I'm not some monster.

"Hi Rachel, I heard you came back to see him" he nods towards the gravestone.

"Yeah, I had too, it just, wouldn't feel right if I stayed in the fucking Capital"

"Ya, I understand, I just wanted to give my respects for him before I went off to work. Katniss said she'll come down later on too, before she goes past the fence"

"Thanks, and I'm glad she'll come, it means a lot to me and Peeta"

Gale and Katniss didn't really know Peeta, but from what I've heard everyone respects him for what he did in the arena. For sacrificing himself for me and for loving me until the end. Everyone fell for my boy.

Gale goes up to the grave and places his hand on top of it, "Rest well my friend, rest well" he whispers, then he nods goodbye to me and is off to the mines.

I only have to wait an hour before Peeta's next visitor comes, its Katniss.

"Hi Rachel" she greets me with a smile too.

"Hey"

Katniss goes up to the grave and places her hand on Peeta's name. She closes her eyes and just stands there for a few moments. Then she nods goodbye to me. She walks right past me and slips out of District Twelve through a sore spot in the fence. It's illegal, but she hunts to feed her family, since her father died. Gale does too, but now he works in the mines. They've never been caught before, but peacekeepers know they do it. They don't care though, we're the poorest District, everyone needs food.

I stay alone for several hours after that, I go and gather flowers from a bush nearby and place them over Peeta. I smile at my work and stand back to look it over. I jump when I feel arms go around me; I look over to see who it is and see Finnick.

"Finn" I smile and turn and hug him. He came. Why did he come? "Why are you here?" I ask, he looks me in the eyes.

"To pay my respects, and to help you if you need it." He smiles.

"Thank you" I say as I get out of the hug. Finnick walks up to the grave and kneels on one knee in front of it. He bows his head and just stays like that. It's a simple gesture, but it means so much: respect, honor, and loyalty. Finnick gets up and comes back to me as I re-read Peeta's gravestone for perhaps the millionth time. Tears swell in my eyes and roll down my face. Finnick wipes them away gently. Some of Peeta's last words come back to me. _"Finnick loves you, I could tell, the way he looks at you."_ I look up at Finnick, he smiles softly at me. Everything on his face soft; his eyes, his smile, his whole expression. His eyes are caring, loyal, and, Peeta's right, loving.

"Do you love me Finn?" I ask barely above a whisper, Finnick strokes my cheek.

"Ya, I love you"


	7. Chapter 7: Anniversary part two

-Rachel:

"So I don't have to act strong?" I whisper.

"No, I'll love you however you are" he tells me. I wrap my arms around his and put my forehead on his chest. He buries his face in my hair; I can feel his breath on my neck. At first I try to hold it in, all the emotions that I've kept bottled up inside for a year. Not wanting to be weak, not wanting to bother others with my emotions.  
>"You can let it out" Finnick whispers.<p>

With that I completely break down. The tears stream out, sobs overtake me. Finnick picks me up and we go and sit next to Peeta's grave. Finnick holds me in his lap as I cry into him.

"Every day I think of him, every day I wonder, if I" I can't continue

"you can tell me"

I nod, "if I didn't volunteer, maybe he'd be here. It's all my fault" I half yell. Finnick's arms tighten around me.  
>"No, it's not your fault, it's the Capitals fault. It's Cato's fault. If you two were the final two we were going to see if both of you could come out."<p>

"really?" I ask half shocked.

"Really" he tells me, and I believe him.

Finnick lets me out of his arms and I go and hug Peeta's family, his two older brothers, his mother, and his father.  
>"We can't stay long" his father explains, his mom stands before the grave, his brothers on either side of her. They all hold hands, heads bowed. Peeta's father joins them, joining his family before their son, their brother, my best friend. Quil turns and offers his hand to me.<p>

"You're part of our family" he smiles sadly at me. I go and take his hand, than bow my head to Peeta. And we stand in a semicircle, around Peeta. Remembering him, never forgetting him. Images of Peeta flood my mind.

In the spring, Peeta pointing out all the new types of flowers blooming. In the summer, as he runs through the meadow with me. In the fall, as we lie in the grass and admire the changing leaves. And in the winter, as the snow is falling outside and he stands outside in shorts and says he loves the feeling of snowflakes landing on his bare skin.

I feel gentle hands go over my shoulders as tears slip out of my eyes again.

That night Finnick and I eat at the Mellarks house. After dinner we all sit around the table, Peeta's father excuses himself for a second.  
>When he returns he's holding what looks to be two letters. He looks at me and holds them out towards me.<p>

"They're for you, from Peeta. I was told not to give them to you until it's been a year. Now I can give them to you" he smiles. I slowly extend my hand and take them, I stare at the envelope. My name has been written there, by a steady hand, by Peeta's hand. I hand the other letter to Finnick, since his name is on it. I open mine, one page, front and back, are covered with Peeta's words for me. I read it to myself in my head:

_Dear Rachel,  
>I love you, always. You know that, that's what we promised each other. Love always. I've been gone for a year now, I'm sure it's been hard for you. I know that if you died in there it would be unbearable. So, I know why you're not dead.<br>You have more to live for, just like I told you. Tell Finnick I say thanks, for giving you something to still live for. And Haymitch too. I think maybe if you died he would be the only reason for me to live. I would keep him alive, because he'd want to die too. We all would.  
>Because you're an amazing girl; the best girl. Sure, you can be pissy, you can be brutal, but that's what I love about you. I just want you to know, these past few days have been the best of my whole life.<br>I've always loved you, I know you love me. Since you caught me kissing that other girl. I could tell you had cried about it when I came in that night. I could tell when you strode up to her the next day and broke her nose in three different places. I didn't even know that was possible, but you can do the impossible.  
>The best part of my day would be seeing you at night. You have no idea how much I wanted to kiss you then. Now I can't remember why I didn't. It's my favorite thing to do. Kiss you, hold you close to me.<br>I'm the happiest person knowing I get to die in your arms, to die with you next to me. Because when I'm dying, you won't leave me. You won't just let me lie there, you'll make it special.  
>I have written a letter for Finnick too. Please give it to him. Just a thanks to him in my own words.<br>I'd like you to know. I'm watching you as I write this, your sleeping, we're almost to the Arena. In the morning I'll give these to Portia, with instructions for them not to be given to you until it's been a year.  
>And I want you to know two more things before this comes to a close. One; I want you to be happy, even if that means marrying someone else. My bet is Finnick. Because we'll see each other again. You can bet the world that when you die, the first person to greet you into heaven will be me. I'll fight through everyone else to be the first. And I'll hold you close, and I'll kiss you, and I'll never let go, I'll never leave your side. Never. Because the final thing I want to say is:<br>You'll always be mine, I'll always be yours. We're each other's, until the end of time.  
>Life passes fast, see you soon:<br>Peeta 3  
><em>  
>I can feel the tears streaming down my face, I can feel the smile that covers my face ear to ear. I look over to Finnick; a smile is on his face too.<p>

-Finnick:

I open my letter; I'm surprised I get one too. What could Peeta want me to know?

_Dear Finnick,  
>I just wanted to thank you. For all that you've done and will do for her. I don't think you know just how much you already mean to her.<br>Whenever someone told her to tell a funny story, she'd tell one about you. Whenever someone asked who her best friend was. She'd say you and me. She always tells everyone you're her brother, whenever anyone would say anything bad about you; well, they soon had a broken bone.  
>Finnick, I know that Snow punishes victors. Please, whatever he makes her do; protect her. Cause if you don't, she'll give up, she's not as strong as she seems. Brutal? Yeah, it's awesome. But strong? No, not that.<br>Thanks Finn. For everything. Keep her safe for me, so she comes back to me happily.  
>Your friend,<br>Peeta.  
><em>  
>I smile, it's a nice letter. And I never knew I meant that much to Rachel. I wonder how many bones she's broken for me?<br>I look over her now, that's when I notice another slip of paper in the envelope for her. I take it out, there's a few music notes on it.

"Rach," I hand her the music. She stares at it, then her eyes have tears in them again. She looks over to Peeta's mother,  
>"can I use the piano?" she asks.<p>

"Oh course, you and Peeta were the only ones who played it" Mrs. Mellark smiles.

I follow Rachel, along with everyone else, over to an old piano. She sets the music on front and starts to play. It's beautiful, but it gets even better when she starts to sing, I've didn't know she sang.

_"Heart beats fast  
>Colors and promises<br>How to be brave  
>How can I love when I'm afraid to fall<br>But watching you stand alone  
>All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow<em>

_One step closer_

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more"<em>

She looks back at me and smiles, her old brilliant smile, she's not crying. She's happy, as happy as I've seen her in a while. I can tell this song means a lot to her. She looks back to the keys and continues her song. It's amazing, because Peeta had only written two lines of music, but she knows the rest by heart.__

_"Time stands still  
>Beauty in all she is<br>I will be brave  
>I will not let anything take away<br>What's standing in front of me  
>Every breath<br>Every hour has come to this_

_One step closer  
><em> 

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more<em>

_And all along I believed I would find you  
>Time has brought your heart to me<br>I have loved you for a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more"<em>

I go and put my hands on her shoulders, she smiles at me again.__

_"One step closer  
>One step closer<em>

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more<em>

_And all along I believed I would find you  
>Time has brought your heart to me<br>I have loved you for a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more"<em>

She takes her hands off the keys; Peeta's family is smiling at her too. They've heard her sing before; it makes me, jealous of them knowing they got to hear it before I did. She's amazing, I wonder if Haymitch even knows she can do this.

Before we go back to her house we go to see Peeta one last time. She stands in front of his gravestone, a smile on her face. I go behind her and wrap my arms around her, she hugs my arms.

"I'll keep her safe for you Peeta" I whisper. We stand there in silence for a while.

"See you soon Peeta" she laughs softly, than we turn and go back to her house.

-Rachel:

I lie in bed that night, Finnick is next to me. His arms around me, he's awake still, he won't go to sleep until I'm sleeping.

"I love you" he tells me, I go closer to him and feel his breath on my skin and then he kisses my cheek.

"Love you too Finn" I smile.

Then something hits me, one single word that could be a big problem. Haymitch.

"Finn?"

"Yeah?" he asks

"What will we do about Haymitch?"

"That's a good question, I guess we'll try to hide it, as long as we can then slowly break it to him."

"Yeah, because you're sure to just sit nicely next to me anytime Haymitch is around" I tease,

"Well, than I guess he'll just have to deal with it."

"Finn, he doesn't like you that much." I point out to him.

"Well, he'll get used to me, besides, if he attacks me for loving you than I can deal with him."

"Okay, we'll see how _that_ turns out"


	8. Chapter 8: whoops

-Haymitch:

Rachel gets back any minute. I've actually missed her a lot more than I thought I would. Boom! A cannon fires as the boy from district three is killed. Damn Games. I look over and see Beetee shaking his head; he had hopes for that kid. I continue my pacing.

"Relax Haymitch, you said she sounded fine on the phone" Seier tells me, I smile at her.

"Yeah, she did, it's just something feels, off" I mumble.

"Just your fatherly instincts" she teases, I wave her off as I laugh.

"Yeah, fatherly" I take a swig from the bottle in my hand.

The bottle soon crashes to the floor when I see Finnick with his arms wrapped around my daughter, and standing much to close for my liking, as an avox enters the room. Yeah, I've seen him hug her before, but that was like, I wasn't drunk. And like, it looked like more than a friendly hug that bitch.

I put a smile on my face as Rachel walks in; much to my fist's disappointment that jerk doesn't come in with her. She comes over and hugs me.

"Missed ya" she tells me.

"Missed you too."

After everyone else has greeted her we sit on the couch next to each other, watching the "wonderful" Hunger Games. As I plot on how to bring up the question on what's going on between her and Finnick I realize I have a lot of other questions. Like, where does she go almost every night? Or why she always moves so stiffly, she looks like she's in pain. And why she and Finnick are making their usual jokes, yeah it's embarrassing for me as a parent to have my kid joking with Finnick Odair about sex, but all the victor's miss it this year.

"So, are you staying after dinner tonight?" I ask warily. Instantly she stiffens and gets nervous.

"Ugh, yeah, I, I can" she mutters. I pretend not to notice, which I could never pull off drunk.

"That's good," I shrug, "since usually you just run off to god-knows-where, I would appreciate it if you told me where you go." I figure I'm on a role here, and I'd rather just get it all out on the table, so to speak. "I mean, I'm sure Finnick knows where you go, cause you always go to talk to him. And maybe you should get a massage sometime, you always move so stiffly since we got here."

Apparently I struck something close to home because she snaps at me.

"Nothing is going on okay! I'm fine! I'm perfectly fine!" she tells me very sternly and gets up to leave.

"Where you going? To Finnick?" I ask

"Actually yes" she snaps at me, she storms out and Chaff comes to sit next to me.

"You're a crappy father"

"thanks a lot" I take the bottle from his hand.

"Want me to talk to her?" he offers

"Knock yourself out" I groan, he grins at me and leaves.

-Rachel:

I run up the stairs, I have to get somewhere, because the truth is, I want to tell my father. So he can protect me. But I know he can't do that. I easily find Finnick in his room; he looks at me with a concerned face.

"What happened?" He asks as he puts his arms around me.

"Haymitch wants to know where I've been every night, why I always look hurt, and why I always go to talk to you about my problems" I tell him as I rest my head against him.

"Maybe he should know,"

"No! He can't! That will hurt him." I plead.

"Hurt who?" a voice asks, we both turn and see Chaff leaning up against the doorway. "I think we all had a little talk with each other. And both of you can tell me exactly what's going on here" he motions with his finger and circles the two of us. I feel Finnick's arms go away from me as he puts them behind his back; he looks like a puppy that just got caught stealing food. His innocent expression.

"Shit" I mumble under my breath.

"Yes, now how about we all sit and have a chat" Chaff grins.

"I don't think it's fair since I'm the only girl here" I complain, this backfires.

"You're right," he waves an avox over, "could you go tell Seeder to come up here?" he asks, the avox nods and goes off to go get here.

"Nice going smartass" Finnick grumbles, clearly he doesn't want another person involved either.

"Sorry" I roll my eyes.

As we wait for Seeder, Chaff tells Finnick and I to sit on the bed, we listen and do. Chaff positions two chairs right in front of where we sit. I feel like I'm being interrogated for a crime. Which I guess is partly true. A few minutes later Seeder appears in the doorway, her usual smile on her face, but it quickly goes away when she sees our little set-up.

"Finnick? What's going on?" she asks

"Ask mr judge man" Finnick grumbles pointing to Chaff.

"Chaff?"

"It seems these two are hiding whatever has been happening. And now we get find out why where she goes off to every night, and why she always walks like she's in pain, and why she always goes to Finnick and not Haymitch" Chaff smiles

"and I'm here why?"

"Female testimony" Chaff laughs, Seeder nods and takes one of the seats in front of Finnick and I, Chaff closes the door and takes the other. He puts his elbows on his knees and stares Finnick in the eyes.

"Spill" he tells him simply. Finnick clenches his hands into fists and I take his hand.

"Nothing. Is. Going. On" he says between clenched teeth.

"Let's start simple then, since that's an obvious lie. What's this about?" Chaff points to my hand in Finnick's.

"I love her" Finnick says softly, he relaxes when he says this. I put my head on his shoulder. Seeder smiles at us, Chaff grins.

"Haymitch will get a kick outta this"

Seeder elbows Chaff, "I think it's wonderful" she smiles at us.

"You're a girl" Chaff points out.

"And you're a drunk, thanks captain obvious" she laughs. Chaff rolls his eyes and gets all serious again.

"Now, why are you acting like you're hurt all the time?" he asks. I stand up, may as well show them. I start to roll up my shirt to show the still evident bruises on my back. Finnick pulls my shirt down.

"You don't have to show them." He says quickly. I smile at him, "It's okay Finn, they'll find out sooner or later" he just nods slowly, I roll my shirt up again and turn around, showing them the semi-healed gash that runs along the middle of my back.

I see Finnick bite his bottom lip, a sharp cry escapes Seeder's lips, and I feel Chaff softly touch it, I guess he's just seeing if it's actually real, I wince as he touches it.

"Finnick you didn't," Seeder whispers.

"No! I would never do this to her!" Finnick says shocked that she would even think that.

"He didn't, but there's more" I tell them as I turn to face them, Chaff's face is emotionless.

"Show us" he orders.

Over the next fifteen minutes I show them my injuries, every time Finnick tells me I don't need to show them. Every time Seeder makes a sound of pain and shock. Every time Chaff just shakes his head like this couldn't have happened to me. I show them my legs, my arms, my hips, my neck, my head, and my chest. I sit back down on the bed next to Finnick, who wraps his arms around me.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Seeder asks concerned, referring to Finnick touching me.

"No, he's gentle" I smile, "sometimes Haymitch hurts though, but I can stand it for a few seconds" I admit.

Surprisingly it's Seeder who asks the question I know they both are wondering.

"How?"

"Zapher," Finnick growls, his grip on my hand tightens a bit.

"What?" Chaff questions Finnick further. Finn looks to me, asking if he should tell, I nod.

"That's who he sold her too; Snow sold her, like he does me. He's Enobaria's son, he's abusive, but you can see that can't you."

Seeder gets tears in her eyes; she takes my hand in hers. "I'm so sorry, I can't imagine"

"It's okay, he's only bad when I don't do what he says, and besides, I don't have to see him anymore. Snow said its different people every night now until he recovers, which may take a while."

They seem horrified that I'm saying it's not too bad since it's not him I'm being forced to sleep with, just other total strangers.

"So, you go tonight too?" Chaff asks me.

"Well, yes, but, I know who it is, and they don't hurt me. Finn convinced Snow to let him buy me until Tuesday, so I won't get hurt, until then."

"Finnick," Seeder goes and hugs him, "you're an angel"

"Yeah, I know" he laughs a bit.

"So, we tell Haymitch." Chaff states.

"No! We can't do that, not him." I plead.

"Why not! Their hurting you, their gunna kill you if this keeps happening!" Chaff yells.

"No, if I cause trouble, then Snow says he'll kill someone I love, I can't let Haymitch try to stop it and he may get killed. Please Chaff, don't tell my father."

After a minute he sighs, "Fine, but if you get seriously hurt, if you get a bone broken, I'm telling. Deal?"

"Deal"

He holds out his hand and I shake it firmly.

On Monday I'm surrounded by cameras as I sit in a chair in the victor's room. There's only ten tributes left now, and they've decided to interview me, last year's victor, to show the public. I hate it, but I didn't really have a say in it. I look past the cameras and see Finnick; he gives me a smile and a thumbs up. I laugh, Haymitch still doesn't know we're, I guess I can call it dating. Finnick never holds my hand or anything if Haymitch is there or anything. Caesar Flickerman struts in and sits next to me in another chair, I angle myself so I can look at him better and answer the questions.

"Just relax and have fun" he smiles at me.

"I will" I put a smile on my face as a red light appears above all the cameras.

"Hello Panem! We're here with last year's victor Rachel Abernathy to get her view on the Games! So Rachel, what do you think of the Games so far?" He inquires at me, raising his eyebrows. _I think it's a ton of bull shit and we should stop because the fucking Capital is unfair as always. _I want to say that, but I don't. Instead I just respond calmly.

"It's a lot longer than last year" is all I say.

"Ah yes this time last year, well, you had won already!" he smiles delighted at me.

"Yeah, guess I did." _This time last year Peeta had been dead for three days._ Somehow Caesar seems to read my mind.

"Everyone's wondering, how are you coping with Peeta's death, it's been over a year now."

"I'm okay, I have support from friends," I smile at Finnick, "and I did go see him the other day."

"You went to see him?"

"Yes, I visited his grave, back home in Twelve. I was given a letter that he wrote for me." I look down sadly.

"What did it say?" he asks intrigued

"That I am his, that he is mine, and that he sure as hell will be the first one to greet me when I die."

Caesar actually gets tears in his eyes, god he's so emotionally, it gets annoying.

"That's so sweet; do you want to say anything else about Peeta?"

"No, I'd rather not"

Caesar nods

"Well, one last question."

"Shoot" I shrug

"Some say you are to blame for Peeta's death, any comment?" he asks. I just stare at him, my jaw drops open and my hands go into fists. I bolt up and grab the arms of Caesars chair. His eyes show me he's terrified, but he just puts up his hands so I can't get too close.

"I didn't kill him got it! It's not my fault. You know whose fault it is?" I yell and I feel arms on my shoulders now; they tug lightly on me as Caesar shakes his head slightly.

"Rachel!" Finnick demands my attention, but I ignore him.

"It's Cato's fault! No! Actually it's not even his fault, it's yours!" I spit out harshly. I'm jerked away from Caesar and I'm lifted into the air.

"It's not worth it Rach. Cut the fucking cameras dammit!" Finnick yells at the cameramen who are taping this live. Finnick sets me down a few yards away from Caesar, he still holds me back.

"It's all of you! It's the Capital! You send those kids to die every year! And you complain if it's quick and easy! You've nev-" my rant is cut short by something on my mouth. I try to pull away, but it follows so I can't, that's when I realize. It's Finnick. Finnick Odair is kissing me.

-Finnick:

I'm not prepared for Rachel's reaction to Caesar's question. I was expecting a simple, no, or maybe she'd start to cry. She bolts up and buts a death grip on Caesar's chair. No one in the room moves, no one says anything, Haymitch doesn't even do anything, but that's because he's drunk and on the other side of the room.

I react first and go and tug on her shoulders. "Rachel!" I demand, she doesn't do anything.

"It's Cato's fault! No!"

Shit, no, don't go there.

"Actually it's not even his fault, it's yours!" Shit she went there, I jerk her off the chair and lift her up. I set her down and make her face me. She turns and points a finger at Ceasar. I notice the cameras and still on her.

"It's not worth it Rach. Cut the fucking cameras dammit!" I yell, the live cameras go off, but other who aren't broadcasting live stay filming. Rachel continues her rant.

"It's all of you! It's the Capital! You send those kids to die every year!" I don't hear what she says next. I need to shut her up, and fast. I grab her face and put my lips on hers, she pulls back but I go towards her, keeping my lips on hers, successfully getting her to stop talking. I can tell when she figures out what's happening because she relaxes instantly, I feel her hands on my chest as I still kiss her.

_Crash! _A glass bottle is broken over my head, I fall to the floor. I clutch my head with one hand as I'm kicked again; I lash out with my other hand. Bringing Haymitch to the ground, I get up before he does and pose myself to take him on. He gets up and goes to punch me, but I grab his wrist and twist it. Another fist makes contact with my head and I topple to the floor.

"Chaff! You jerkface!" I hear Rachel yell before I black out on the floor.

... chapter end ...

Enjoyable chapter? I liked writing this a lot, i got stuck in some spots but I think they turned out well. Haymitch ain't gunna be too happy after what he saw, but how should I make him react? hmm so many possiblities, oh the power of the author. XD So anyways just a heads up, Zapher is a quick healer

Big, big, big thanks to booksandmusic97 and meganlucindaxo for the reviews! I LOVE REVIEWS!


	9. Chapter 9: dicipline

**Oops forgot to mention this part, Annie isn't a part of this story. She's not, well I don't know, she's a victor and everything, but Finnick doesn't really know her. Hope you like this chapter, it was a bit strange to write but I liked how it turned out. Happy reading and remember WWFD. (what would Finnick do) :D**

-Rachel:

"Ow, ow! Don't ripe my ear off Haymitch!" I complain as my adopted father literally drags me out of the room by the ear.

"Shut it!" he barks as he slams his fist on the twelve button on the elevator. We arrive on our floor and I'm dragged farther into Haymitches room, where I'm ordered to sit on the bed while the door is slammed shut.

"WHAT WAS THAT!" he screams in my face, his breath reeks of liquor.

"What was what?" I ask, does he mean the taunting the Capital or Finnick kissing me?

"Ugh! Everything!"

"The Capital part that was stating facts. The Finnick part, I don't know, I guess he wanted to stop my ranting." I shrug.

"God help me," Haymitch moans, then his eyes narrow at me, "I don't want you spending any more time with Finnick," I just stare at him dumbfounded. He. Can't. Do. That. "ever." he finishes.

I stand up and almost shove him backwards, "You can't do that!" I yell, "You don't even have a reason!"

Haymitch grins, "I don't need a reason"

"I can still see Finn whenever I want"

"No, actually you can't, give me your key." He holds out his hand.

"No" I say simply, I've never told Haymitch no before, he guffaws at me.

"What did you say?"

"I said no"

"Sorry, that's not the right answer." I never knew Haymitch could actually still have quick reflexes, but he does somehow, since in a matter of seconds he has my arms pinned behind me and the key in his hand. He marches me off to my room.

"Grounded until further notice" he informs me as he pushes me in my room.

"Jerk" I spit at him, he laughs.

"Wow, I got an upgrade form drunk to jerk"

Ugh, I hate him so much right now.

::::;;;;;::::

After dinner I wait until Haymitch isn't looking to slip out the back door. Yeah, I still get to see Finnick, at least for tonight and tomorrow night, because I still have to go to the hell hotel. So there, Haymitch can't keep me from seeing Finnick, at least until Wednesday he can't. I make my way to the usual room, before I even open the door I'm in Finnick's arms.

"I'm sorry" he tells me. I look up at him confused.

"For what?" he has nothing to be sorry for at all. He stopped my ranting, in a rather pleasant way too. I did feel bad about it before, but Peeta said I should be happy. Finnick makes me happy. Finn brings me in the room and closes the door so we're not just standing in the hallway.

"For the"

"I liked that" I cut him off, he grins down at me.

"You did?"

"Why wouldn't I?" I laugh.

Instead of answering I feel him kiss me again. He moves closer to me as I put my arms around him. Once he runs out of air Finnick puts his forehead on mine.

"Finn"

"Yeah?"

"Haymitch said I'm not allowed to see you."

"And?" he asks for something further.

"And nothing" I grin, Finn grins back and kisses me again.

"Thanks Finn" I tell him once his lips come off of mine again.

"wha?" of course he's confused.

"For not hurting me, the others do, you don't,"

-Finnick:

A thought creeps into my head, a thought only Finnick Odair can have. Sadly, Finnick Odair is me. I thought it when she said, for not hurting me. My stupid brain thought, _Hey, you can show her that something else doesn't hurt either. _But that wouldn't turn out well, she's scared of it. Which sucks. But I could, I could show her, now how do I bring that up? My stupid brain puts the sentence out of my mouth before I can even think of what I'm saying.

"I can show you it doesn't always hurt, not always bad."

She stares up at me, stunned. Shit, shit, shit, I just ruined everything. Or so I thought.

"Really?" she asks. "You'd do that? For me?"

This conversation is totally on a new level of awkward.

"Yeah, of course"

;;;;:::::::;;;;;;

-Rachel:

"I love you Finn" I tell him, his arms go around my waist as he steps closer to me.

"I love you too." He kisses me, I grin at him.

"Prove it" I only see him grin for a split second before his lips are on mine again. I feel him touch my bottom lip, asking me if he can. I open my mouth more and let him. He's never kissed me like this before, no one has, not even Peeta.

I feel my hands grip his shirt, than I only think of Finnick. My Finnick.

:::::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;;::::::::::::::::

-Finnick:

I lie next to her in bed, my arms wrapped protectively around her. Her skin feels cold against my own, so I pull her closer. She stirs slightly in my arms.

"We need to leave soon" I whisper to her, she just nods slightly. Slowly and gently I help her get up, she dresses again as I put my pants back on. I hear voices and boots coming down the hallway, wonder what that could be?

The door flies open as peacekeepers flood the room. I grab Rachel and put her behind me, the peacekeepers guns trained on us.

"What is this!" I demand to them. One of them grins at me.

"We take her; Snow would like to speak to her. You know, about her conduct." He motions to Rachel, who stiffens. We both know what Snow means; he's talking about her rant against the Capital earlier today. Because no one speaks out against the Capital. Especially not someone who has power and influence over the people, like a victor. I feel her coming out to go with them; I gently push her back behind me.

"Finn I don't have a choice" she tells me.

"No! I won't let you." I yell at the peacekeepers. Rachel goes and steps in front of me.

"I'll be fine, he just wants to talk. I'll see you soon, okay? Just let me go with them, I'll be fine Finnick." She laughs softly, she's making me feel like a five year old using my full name. I take a shaky breath and nod slowly; she gives me a quick hug. Then quickly, all too quickly, the peacekeepers surround her and march her out the door, leaving me alone.

-Rachel:

As I'm surrounded I let out a sigh, I knew this was coming. I'd be more worried if they hadn't come, given all the things I had said, given all the things the whole nation heard me say. I'm taken outside and lead to a car. It's a short ride, and before I know it, I'm standing outside the doors to President Snow's office. Wonderful.

I'm let inside, but unlike last time, there are no excess peacekeepers here. I look around frantically, this isn't good. But Snow is a bitch, nothing is good if it involves him.

"Please sit, we have a lot to talk about" he smiles at me, his eyes pierce into mine. Snake eyes. I listen and take the seat across from him. He gets right to business.

"You created quite a lot of talk with your little outburst this morning I'm afraid. Something, that, I'm sorry to say, I couldn't let go unpunished for you." He takes a remote and motions for me to look at a television screen, he presses play.

I cover my mouth as I see the square in District Twelve. In the square though, Gale is tied to a whipping post, while a peacekeeper whips him repeatedly, over and over again. Even though the camera is far off, I can hear the whip being brought down on his back. As I examine the scene more, I see three squirrels above him.

"Your friend got caught coming in from the woods. Didn't you ever tell him that was illegal?" Snow presses a button and the screen goes black. When I don't respond Snow grins at me. "I know they go in every day. But if you slip up more, well, then maybe they might be caught more often."

"Please don't" I plead

"Well, I won't if you're good. So as a personal punishment, you don't get to see Mr. Odair tomorrow, your new schedule is to start. And furthermore, I'm going to make sure that you don't see your new boyfriend for a long time. Well, you can see him, but you won't get to speak to him, or interact with him in any way. Because if I get word you that you do." He presses play again and I see Gale being whipped once more. "Than your friends will suffer"

I just nod and stand to leave. "By the way, I saw this." Snow presses another button, I see myself and Finnick on screen, kissing. I turn on my heel and barge out of the room. I need to get back, I need to get to my room, quickly.

As I arrive in my room I punch a hole in the wall. I meant every word I said about the Capital. And Gale had to pay for it, not me, Gale. And he didn't even do anything wrong, he doesn't know why he's being punished, because usually he sells his game to the peacekeepers. But now instead of paying him for it, their whipping him. I hear footsteps coming down the hallway from the elevator, Haymitch. He opens the door, his eyes widen as he sees my fist in the hole in the wall.

"Just go! Leave me alone!" I scream.

Haymitch doesn't say anything, but goes and sits on my bed. "There's ten left" he informs me.

"Great! More kids dead! Joy!" I say as I remove my fist and drive it through the wall again.

"Come sit, what's wrong?" Haymitch's voice takes on the soft fatherly tone that I've only heard a few times in my life. Usually, when he talks to me this way, I spill my guts to him. But now, I can't do that. He can't know, even if it's just getting worse. But I sit down anyways, I'll tell him something different.

"Can I see Finnick?" I ask him, I know the answer, even if he says yes I can't see Finnick. His answer doesn't surprise me.

"No, I don't want you too, now that you're older, he's bad for you"

Bad for me! Bad for _me_? Finnick is what keeps me from killing myself; the thing that is _bad_ for me happens to be the best thing in my sucky life right now. I want to scream at Haymitch, but I don't. I just nod like a good daughter and lean against Haymitch. I allow myself to forget all that's happened over the past week, the past month, the past year. I just sit there, my father comforting me. How long ago was I just his little girl, when I needed him, when he could protect me?

If only he knew. If only he knew that he can't protect me anymore that he's lost that girl that he half raised. That the girl who would watch the Games and wonder how on earth those kids kill each other would now drive a knife through someone without question. If only he knew, who I've become on the inside: maniacal, killer, brutal, rash, harsh, unstable, whore, and a rebel.

If only I could tell him.


	10. Chapter 10: A Victor

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games! Only characters I own in this story is Rachel and Zapher(sadly). Congrats to the New York Giants for winning the Super Bowl! Yessss! I was soo happy! Hope you enjoy da chapta! Now READITH!**

-Rachel:

You know how people say you don't know what you had until it's gone? Well it only takes me about three hours to realize how much I need Finnick. I walked down to breakfast this morning and saw him sitting at his table, I also saw all the peacekeepers in the room who will be watching in and if I make any interactions with him, he smiled at me. I quickly looked away from him, feeling the gazes of the peacekeepers glaring the life out of me.

I ate with my father, Chaff, Seeder, Ceier, and even Johanna joined us. We mostly talked about how we're glad the Games will be over soon, and how it looks like the boy from District Five will be the winner this year. Surprisingly he's not a Career, which I'm personally as happy as someone with my current life can be about that. Finnick had joined our table too, which, so I wouldn't be tempted to talk to him. I immediately stood up and dismissed myself, earning a grin from my father, and several confused looks from the others. Finnick looked hurt, it took all my strength not to cave and go hug him.

Once in the victor's room I did the only thing I could do, I turned my full attention to the Games. What's left of the Career pack is out hunting for the others, while the boy from five is happily hiding out in a cave he found. He somehow figured out how to catch the fish easier, so his cave is full of food. I heard the door open and Finnick walk in. I didn't even have to look; I know what Finnick's footsteps sound like. I heard him come closer, which usually, if I wasn't under the threat of if I interacted with him someone I loved would be beaten or killed, I would turn and run to him, but I didn't even flinch. I didn't even turn around or wave or do anything to show I knew he was there. But he knew I knew he was. I heard him sigh before he turned and walked off somewhere else.

So I still sit on the couch now, fixated on the Games. My eyes narrow as the ground by the cornucopia opens up. Then, I see ten big cats, I think their called tigers or something, come from the ground. They're not normal though; no cat stands almost five feet tall on four legs, or has razor sharp claws and teeth. No, they're mutations. And my bet is that each one is programmed to take down a certain tribute. My bet is confirmed when the camera close up's on the collars and the announcers explain that, in fact, they are each programmed to go after a certain tribute.

"This should be fun" I growl, I'm in a very pissy mood.

"Just what I thought too." I look over as Johanna sits next to me. We both watch in silence for the next hour as one of the tigers take out their tribute, the girl from nine. The tiger goes back to the cornucopia, the ground opens and it goes inside. Boom! The girl's cannon goes off of she takes her last breath.

"So, you and Finnick break up or something?" Johanna asks. I stiffen, Johanna and I, despite what others think, consider each other as friends. I take a breath.

"Let's just say I don't really get a say, and he doesn't know" there, she can figure that one out, she's smart.

"Oh, sorry kid" she means it too.

"Thanks" I grumble. We continue to watch the Games, most of the tributes don't know about the tigers yet, but they'll find out soon enough.

;;;;;:::::::;;;;;;

That night I walk back into the tower. Tonight was horrid, a new man, a Capital man. Worst of all, a Gamemaker, who for a fact, I know he has a family back home. I shudder, trying to erase the night from my memory. I walk into the dining area towards the elevator and pull my jacket around me tighter. I wasn't hurt as much this time, my time with Finnick helped me figure out how not to get hurt so badly. But still, he hurt me; my new bruises can prove that.

I stop as I notice the figure watching me from the corner of the room. My eyes lock with the sea-foam green ones that watch me sadly, the expression in them. It makes me feel like a peacekeeper just shot me through my heart. I'd run to him now, but there's cameras. There's people watching those cameras, and there's people back home with whips prepared to use them on my friends if they see me say anything or hug Finnick in any way. But I can't be the first to pull out of our gazing at each other. His eyes ask the question for him without words. _Why? Why are you avoiding me? What did I do wrong? _I almost die right there, but instead I just shake my head slightly at him. _No. It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong. _He stands up, that's when I look to the floor, down to my feet, and run to the elevator. Leaving him alone, like I have all day, like I'll have to for I don't know how long. But I know it may kill me inside.

Instead of going to my room, which I know Finnick may check, I go to the victor's room. I'm the only one there, I'm glad about that. I take a seat on the couch in front of the main screen, I pull a nearby blanket over myself, but when I see the tributes onscreen I toss the blanket to the floor. They don't have one, why should I get one. I sit and think about my crappy life, I wish Peeta was here, he would know what to say, he would know what to do. Then a thought comes to mind.

What if? What if I just disappeared? Just left, like, when I get back to District Twelve, just leave. I could do it, go off, and live in the woods, by myself. But what would happen to Haymitch, and Gale, and Katniss, and Peeta's family. And Finnick, what would they all do? Haymitch would stay, the Capital wouldn't do anything to him, me being gone would be enough for him. Gale and Katniss, I don't know what I would do with them, maybe they could come too? It would take convincing, but I could get Haymitch to keep their families fed; we have more than enough food. But still, Gale wouldn't leave Vick, or Rory, or Posy, at least not without a cause. And Katniss wouldn't leave Prim, never. I could go off, see if I could start a rebellion, to stop the Games, to get rid of Snow. Gale would come for that, I'm sure he would. But there are too many things the Capital could do if I do that. We could get caught, certain execution then. They could kill our families, we would come back, again, certain execution. I push the wonderful thoughts from my head, one day, one day, maybe when Haymitch is gone, when Gale and Katniss don't have to feed their families. Than we can start a rebellion, than we will.

With these happy thoughts of a dead Snow, a dead Capital, in my head, I drift off to sleep.

;;;;;::::::::;;;;;;

-Finnick:

_Crunch! _My fist collides with the wall of my room. What did I do wrong! Something's wrong, that's very clear, Rachel didn't say anything to me, she avoided me. Almost like she's afraid of me now. Why would she be? I know it's not because of last night, than she told me she would see me soon. After her visit with Snow, that changed. But it's my fault, I'm sure it is. Johanna knows whats going on; I could tell by the smug smile she gave me after she talked with Rachel in the victor's room. Where is she now anyways? I checked her room, she wasn't there. Victor's room? Maybe, I'll check.

Sure enough, I see her there on the couch. I go and stand in front of her, she's sleeping. Too bad, I have to talk to her, I _need _too. I shake her gently until she wakes up. Immediately she recoils when she sees me, glancing around frantically. Her eyes lock on a camera in the room, she doesn't say a word but uses her toes to try and gently push me away.

"No! What's going on?" I demand. She shakes her head and points to the door. She wants me to leave! She's biting her lips together, like she doesn't want me to touch them, or doesn't want to talk, or both?

"You want me to leave!" I ask shocked, slowly she nods; I see her lip starts to bleed as she bites her lips harder, holding in whatever she wants to say.

"Don't you love me?" I whisper, she closes her eyes now and looks away from me. She nods, than points back to the door. "Then why are you doing this?" I ask her softly. She just glares at me and points at the doors again, she pushes me towards them. _Go! Leave me alone now! _Her eyes yell at me. But there's sadness in them too. "Okay." I sigh, than I leave, more confused than ever.

;;;;;::::::::;;;;;;

-Rachel:

"Congratulations to the final three of the seventy third Hunger Games!" Claudius Templesmith booms throughout the arena to the final three tributes.

It's been three day's since Finnick came to see me that night in the victor's room. Luckily I had been good and not said a word, so none of my friends had been punished. But I felt more depressed than ever, I hadn't talked to Finnick, had barely even looked at Finnick, for the past four days. It was killing me. I didn't eat much, neither did he by what I heard. Haymitch was happy I didn't hang out with him anymore though, that's one plus side, the only plus side.

The other six tributes had been killed by their tigers. Now only the boy from Five, the girl from Two, and the boy from Nine remained. The Five boy had been driven from his cave when he encountered his tiger for the first time, luckily he managed to get up a tree, than the gamemakers let him live longer and called the mutt off.

The Games end today, everyone knows it, and everyone can feel it. The tributes want it to end too; one by one it shows them all come out from their hiding places. No one knows where the tigers are; only the gamemakers at this point, my bet is they're stalking the tribute until they get to the cornucopia, which is where the three are heading.

I tense on the couch that I sit on, wedged between Haymitch and Chaff, as all three enter the grassy plain that the horn sits on from different directions. Immediately the two boys go into battle with each other. One wielding a knife, the other an axe. Within seconds the cannon that symbolizes the death of the District Nine boy goes off. Than the last two tributes clash together. Then the tigers come out to play.

Right as the tributes clash the tigers rush out as a pack. Creating some offensive formation as they barrel down upon the tributes. The girl tribute's mouth drops open as she points, the boy looks and sees the tigers. They quickly take off as one; now the winner will be the faster of the two. I'm on my feet now.

"Run! Run dammit! Go faster!" I scream at the television, they're the first words I've said in two days.

It happens too fast, way too fast. The tigers overcome both tributes at the same time. Two pounce on the girl, her screams fill the room, she screams until her head is snapped off of her body. But it doesn't end there, the tigers don't go away. They turn on the boy who is running for his life, the boy who is rightfully the victor.

"HE WON DAMMIT! HE ALREADY WON!" my screams are echoed by the other victors, we're all screaming our heads off. The tigers pounce on the boy; they toss him around like a ragdoll. And then, they kill him. I feel my knees give out as I fall to the floor. The whole room is quiet, no correction, the whole nation is quiet. The Hunger Games don't have a victor. There is no victor. They just murdered all twenty-four tributes, no one won. Nobody got to come out alive. _Winning means fame and fortune, loosing means certain death._ Yeah, unless no one wins.

**Hoped you liked it! Now everyone gets to go back home :] but no until the next day.**


	11. Chapter 11: Home

**Hope you enjoy this chapter! Enjoy and remember review!**

-Rachel:

I make my way down the hallway to my room in the hell hotel, _just one more time than you get a few months to yourself,_ I remind myself as I take a breath. I've only been awake for a while, I blacked out after I had fainted after the Games ended. I clench my fists together again thinking how there is no victor. Damn the Capital, damn them to hell. I go knock slowly on the door, I could just walk in, but I don't. Maybe one day they won't answer and I can leave without being used.

The door opens, the face grins slyly down at me. My eyes widen as I look him over, a cast on his arm. I feel my heart racing, my jaw dropped. He puts his arm around me and pulls me inside.

"I missed you baby" Zapher tells me softly, than he knees me in the stomach. "Good thing your friend can't help you now".

;;;;::::::::::::;;;;;

I've learned my lesson from Zapher, so I don't get out of bed later. He grins at me when he sees I'm still in his arms. His cast didn't keep him from beating me, if anything, it made it worse. He comes closer and kisses me again, "good girl" he croons.

"Can, can I go now?" I ask carefully

He kisses me again, than pushes me off the bed and I go crashing to the floor. I hear my wrist crack slightly; I bit my lip in pain. Zapher comes over and sees me holding it gently. He gets up, and slams his foot down, driving down on my wrist. Shattering most of the bones in it. He grinds it into the floor as I scream in pain. He looks down at me gently, "Now you can go" I nod and get up and dress carefully, wincing whenever my clothes touched my wrist. I'm about to leave when Zapher spins me around again, he slams his lips to mine. Then he strokes my face softly, "see you in a few months" I turn and leave, still cradling my wrist. As I step out of the hallway Chaff's words come back to me …_but if you get seriously hurt, if you get a bone broken, I'm telling.. _I look to my wrist, hey, it's not broken, it's shattered.

;;;;::::::::;;;;;;

Shit. That's what goes through my mind as I walk into the dining area and Chaff, Seeder, Seier, Johanna, Beetee, and Woof are there. Immediately Chaff and Seeder's eyes lock on my wrist, which I'm holding carefully in front of me, it dangles down loosely.

"Hi everyone" I mumble as I quicken my pace to the elevator. I yelp as a hand catches my arm, I turn, it's Chaff.

"Show me" he commands, I hold out my wrist to him, he barely touches it and I yelp in pain. His face goes grave. "Can you move it?" I shake my head slightly. "Follow me" he says as he pulls me down the hallway. Crap, I'm in big trouble.

Ten minutes later some medical staff has given me a custom brace to wear on my wrist, it doesn't hurt as much, well, I wouldn't know. I can't feel it; I had some pill that numbs my wrist until it heals. Now Chaff squats down so I have to look him in the eyes. "Remember our deal?" he asks. Sadly, I do remember. I nod, "Come on then, it'll be like pulling off a band aid, tell him nice and quick"

Oh yes I'm sure as hell going to walk up to Haymitch and be like, _Oh you want to know why I really have been moving stiffly around and all hurt and going to Finnick? It's because Snow is forcing me to be a Capital whore and you wouldn't understand only Finnick does and that's why I go to him. And if I don't do it then he'll kill or hurt you or Gale or Katniss or Peeta's family. Or any other victor. _Yeah that's NOT going to happen.

Chaff takes me up to Haymitches room, we knock on the door and wait for him to answer. Haymitch's eye's narrow at us. "What's going on?" he asks, he eyes my brace.

"She needs to tell you what's been going on, I've known, but, it's gone too far now without you knowing." I've never heard Chaff talk like this, he sounds, responsible.

"Sit and tell me, now" my father orders me. I go and sit on the bed, my feet dangling down, not touching the floor. Chaff stands in the corner of the room, giving my father and I privacy for each other, but so he can step in if he needs too. Haymitch stands in front of me.

"First off, promise not to interrupt me?" I ask.

"Promise,"

I take a shaky breath and close my eyes.

"Like a band aid" Chaff murmurs from the corner, I nod.

"I'm not, pure, anymore" I say softly. Haymitch doesn't understand.

"Pure?"

"I'm a whore" I snap, Haymitch puts his hands on my shoulders.

"No, you're not, you can't say that, you haven't even," he stops his sentence, trying not to make this awkward. Well too bad, this conversation is going nowhere but awkward.

"No, I've done that, a lot, I"

"WHAT!" Haymitch bursts out, "HOW COULD YOU? YOU, WHO? WHA? FINNICK!" Haymitch explodes.

"No, he doesn't hurt me, Snow, he, he did what he does to Finnick to me." I continue after Chaff comes in and calms my father down a little bit.

"Snow what?"

"He sold her Haymitch, that's where she goes every night, she doesn't have a choice." Chaff saves me from having to say the words myself. Haymitch's eyes widen as he stares at me, I can't hold his gaze, so I look down at my wrist.

"Did they? Hurt you?"

I nod, "Show him." Chaff instructs me. I do as I'm told and show Haymitch the purple bruises, the scars, the cuts, and the new black bruises. "One shattered her wrist tonight, that's what the brace is for." Chaff explains.

"I need to stop this." Haymitch says as he stands.

"No," I say, Haymitch looks at me like I'm insane, which, I am. "You can't they'll hurt someone else. They whipped Gale the other day, because I kissed Finnick. They punished him because of me" I choke out.

After that I let Chaff do all the talking, only putting in details when needed. He tells my dad how Snow has threatened me, how only one boy was using me at first. He leaves out the Finnick part, only saying the boy got injured, than says how I got a break for a while. Then things started back up again. "She must've broken her wrist tonight." He concludes. Haymitch just nods, he's sitting in a chair, his hands are limp, hanging between his legs. He looks up slowly at me.

"Does, does Finnick have anything to do with this?" he asks, obviously thinking how I always went to him when I got back at night. I nod, "Can you tell me?" he pleads.

"He's been, helping me out. He always let me come and talk to him, since he's been through it before too. Than one night Zapher had brought some of his friends over, to, to try me out. I ran downstairs and yelled in Zapher's face. Finn was there, he beat Zapher up, when Zapher was abusing me right in the lobby. For the next few nights Finnick had bought me. So I wouldn't have to do anything, so I could be safe." I explain.

I'm not surprised by Haymitch's next question, "Did you and Finnick?" he asks cautiously.

"Finnick helped me."

"But did you?" he repeats. Slowly I nod.

"I love Finnick, and he loves me, he didn't hurt me, he never would, he helped, the last few times weren't as bad." I explain. Haymitch is shaking his head now, than, he gets up and wraps his arms around me. I return his hug.

"Go to sleep, we get to go home in the morning." He smiles at me, I return it.

"They won't let me see him anymore, I'm not allowed." I say, referring to Finnick.

"I'm going to go talk to him now." He tells me softly. "Good night sweetheart."

"Haymitch, I'm not a little girl anymore. I'm a killer, a murderer." I say, he strokes the hair out of my face.

"You're still my little girl, no matter what happens."

;;;;;;::::::::;;;;;;;

-Haymitch:

I tell Chaff to go to bed; I can handle myself when I talk to Finnick. So I stand outside his door, alone, on the fourth floor. My world's been turned upside down. I had no idea what was going on with my daughter, no idea the suffering she was going through. And now, I don't know if I should hug Finnick when he answers the door or beat the shit outta him. When he does answer, I just stand there, searching his eyes for anything that I could be mad at him about. He slept with my daughter, yeah, but he was helping. He loves her, she loves him, I can't really change that. So I just grasp his shoulder.

"Thank you"

"For what?" he asks a little pissed at me.

"Helping her, through everything." I explain, I see it click in his head and he stands aside so I can come inside the room.

"It's nothing, but I don't get, why won't you let her see me?" he asks confused. I sigh.

"I'd gladly let her see you now, since you're the only one who can really help her with this. But I'm not the one keeping her from seeing you. It's Snow. He told her that if she sees you she'll be punished. Since you kissed her to get her to shut up the other day they whipped one of her best friends back home."

Finnick is silent for a long time, his eyes closed and fists wrenched together. I can hear his breathing and guess he's trying to calm himself down. Finally he looks me in the eyes, "I love her"

"I know, and I don't think you know how much she loves you." Why am I telling him this? I don't know, I guess it's my fatherly stuff kicking in, telling him this, making sure that he won't leave her. Finnick puts his hands on my shoulders.

"I need to see her; I _need _to before we all leave in the morning." He pleads. I shake my head, "Okay" I mouth, there's cameras here too.

"Where? Peacekeepers are everywhere." I mouth, they can't be spotted if they meet.

"Dust cavern, tell her that, she knows that." He whispers, I nod slowly. Then, Finnick hugs me. It's awkward, but not as much as I'd thought it'd be. Not that I ever thought of Finnick Odair hugging me or anything.

;;;;::::::;;;;;

-Rachel:

I'm still awake when Haymitch comes in my room, he sits on the bed.

"Go to the dust cavern, just, be back before we leave." Haymitch tells me. Dust cavern? Dust cavern? Oh! Dust cavern! It's the attic in the library! It's so dusty up there one time Finnick called it a dust cavern. I wrap my arms around Haymitch before I jump out of bed and literally sprint down the hallway, still in my pajamas.

Luckily Seeder tosses me a jacket that I catch with my good hand, when she sees I'm heading outside. Apparently they figured out where I'm going. "Have fun!" Seeder tells me with a smile.

"Oh course I will!" I smile at her before I pull the jacket's hood over my head and hurry my way through the still crowded streets of the Capital. It doesn't take me long at all to reach library. Finnick's here, and I can see him, I can talk to him. There are no cameras in the library, no peacekeepers. It's a library, they don't need peacekeepers here. And almost no one goes up to our dust cavern.

I stop at the top of the stairs when I see Finnick, sitting on the couch, his face in his hands.

"Finn." I call softly, his head snaps up and his eyes come alive. "You're not just going to sit there are you?" I ask when he doesn't even stand up. "I can't even feel my wrist, they numbed it, promise." I smile, with that he gets up and soon I'm in his arms. I feel his lips on my neck, warm and loving.

"Missed you" he whispers

"You too Finn, you keep me sane"

He draws back and looks at me questioningly.

"I'd be dead without you Finn, I'd go insane"

"Guess I'll just have to keep you sane," he grins

"Guess so." I whisper before he kisses me, I feel my good hand go through his hair. Finnick's kiss gets stronger; I don't even feel him pick me up. But soon he's holding me in his arms and my own are around his neck. After our make-out session Finnick puts his forehead on mine, he laughs softly. "What?" I ask him.

"I can't believe I've ever thought of you as my little sister."

"Ya, what do you think of me now?" I ask.

"Beautiful, wonderful, perfect."

I kiss him again. "What are we going to do?" I ask

"About what?"

"Over the next few months, we can't call; they'll tap into the conversations."

"Ya, let's make the most of now, than just hold on till we see each other again, and I'll be thinking of you constantly."

"Okay."

Finnick kisses me again and I lean into him, he sits down on the old dusty couch and pulls me closer to him.

;;;;;::::;;;;;;

The next morning I wake up in my bed in the tower. I already said good-bye to Finnick last night, since we can't interact this morning, but I've got to go say bye to everyone else. I walk into the dining area, my bags are all packed and on their way home already, so I go and hug Johanna.

"Stay strong kid okay?" she whispers

"I will." I promise her.

Than I say goodbye to the others: Beetee, Wiress, Ceier, Chaff, Seeder, Woof, Abril (from district nine), and Titus (the only nice victor from district one). I lock eyes with Finnick for a second, than I look away, only to see Haymitch and Ceier saying goodbye. Then Haymitch puts his arms around my shoulders, we wave our last goodbyes and make our way to the hanger to board an aircraft to take us home.

;;;;;;;;;;:::::::::::::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

We touch down in Twelve only three hours later. I don't even go in the house, I need to see Gale, I need to apologize to him. I go straight for the woods; he'll be in there, most likely with Katniss. Sure enough, when I go to our usually meeting spot, there is a pile of three rabbits there. Gale and Katniss aren't there; most likely they dropped these off here and went to check to remainder of their nearby snare line. I take a knife out of my back pocket and place a rabbit on my lap. I start to skin it with one hand, I've skinned thousands of rabbits, I used to come into the woods myself, alone. When I got back I went a few times with Gale and Katniss. Usually it bothers me, skinning the animals, but now I don't give a crap at all. I've changed so much, let's see, who am I?

_My name is Rachel Abernathy. My adopted father is Haymitch; he's a drunk and a victor. I'm a victor. I was going to marry Peeta Mellark. He had saved my life. I loved him. He's dead now. It's mostly my fault. I'm mentally unstable. I'm a murderer. I'm a killer. I'm a Capital whore because victor's always get punished. I'm sixteen years old. Now I love Finnick. Peeta said I'm allowed to love Finnick. I should be dead; I should be dead because I spoke out against the Capital. They punished Gale instead. Gale was hurt, it was my fault. He probably still is hurt._

Hey, that means he won't be hunting, he'll be at home. I stare at the rabbit in my hand, so that also means. Katniss is doing the hunting for both of their families alone right now. As I come to this Katniss appears from the woods, two other rabbits on her belt. She stops dead and stares at me, eyes the rabbit in my lap, eyes my wrist.

"Your boyfriend hurt you too. Cause he got Gale hurt, or you did." She mocks me. Before she knows whats happening I have her against a tree, the tip of my knife rests on her throat. She eyes the knife, her eyes flaming with fear. "You wouldn't" she snaps. I'm not too surprised, out of the two, Gale and I got together better, Katniss and I just tolerate each other.

"Oh I would, and more, cause you know what? I'm a victor. I'm a killer. I'm a murderer. And you don't know what I've been through; _you've _never been in the arena. So you don't talk shit about me and Finn, cause we've both been there. Cause we've been punished for making it out. And for your information, I didn't want this to happen to Gale, he's my friend. So don't you say a damn word." I snap at her.

"Okay" she says softly, I think I've honestly scared her. I soften the weight I've been putting on her with my braced arm. I toss the skinned rabbit to her.

"Take it will you?" I snap, than I walk off to find Gale, cleaning my bloody knife on my shirt.

;;;;::::::::::::;;;;;;;

-Katniss:

Holy shit. What happened to her? Ya I snapped at her about Gale being whipped, because he and I were told what had happened, Darius let it slip out. But I never had seen her like that before. Never thought she could pin me like that, with a broken whatever in her arm. And never had I imagined her holding a knife to my throat and saying she would slit my throat. I guess the Games do change everyone.

Because that wasn't the happy, carefree girl who left for the Games at all. That wasn't even the depressed girl who left to mentor. No, that was someone who's been, or is being, driven to the edge of their mental and emotional limits.


	12. Chapter 12: One word

**Please enjoy my little fangirl rant at the end of this chapter! If you don't like Josh Hutcherson, than don't read the rant. It's bout him :] Anyways enjoy this chapter! I can't tell you if something big happens here since I'm writing this before the actual chapter, still deciding if the big kicker should come in this chapter or the next. Oh just decided, it'll end this chapter. Don't cha love cliffhangers? I know I do! Enjoy!**

**;;;;;;:::::::::;;;;;;;;;**

**-**Rachel:

I knock lightly on the Hawthorne's front door. Than cross my fingers and hope someone will answer. The door opens slightly, I see Rory's head peek out, his eyes widen when he sees me. I crouch down and tousle his black hair a bit.

"Hi Rory, is Gale here?" I ask with a smile. Rory eyes me carefully; apparently the whole family knows why Gale was punished. He just nods slowly. "Can I talk to him, I'd, I'd really like to see him, to explain a few things." I ask.

"I'll be back, stay outside" Rory tells me, I just nod and lean against their house as Rory goes in to ask Gale if I can talk to him. I'm there for quite a while, just waiting, I'm about to give up when the door opens again. Rory looks up at me, he smiles at me. "Come on" he says as he takes my hand, I let him lead me through the house. I'm lead to Gale's bedroom, he's in his bed still, his torso is bandaged. I sit in a chair by him and wait till Rory leaves, which leaves Gale and I alone in his room.

"Hey, I need to explain something." I tell him.

"Shoot" he shrugs, he's probably already convinced himself I'm going to lie to him.

"I didn't know they were going to hurt you, not until after it happened. I didn't mean for it to happen. I mean, I knew speaking against the Capital in front of the cameras wouldn't do me any good, but I didn't think that they would hurt people back home."

"What! You spoke against the Capital! On camera! We were told it was because- ugh never mind, it doesn't matter now. What did you say?" there's that light in his eyes that I've seen in the woods before. It's there whenever he talks about rebelling against the Capital. Gale's a rebel, a born rebel.

"I said they weren't fair, said how the Games do nothing good, I accused them of murdering those kids in there."

Gale's eyes are ablaze now, a wide smile on his face. "And it's all my fault you were whipped." I finish.

"Rachel-I'd let myself get whipped a thousand more times if it's because some people heard a victor speak out against the Capital" he laughs.

"Soooo we're friends?" I ask

"Ya"

"Okay good, cause I don't think I'm friends with Katniss after I threatened to slit her throat in the woods." I say it quickly.

"You what?" He asks in shock.

"Don't worry she's fine, it was her fault. Bye Gale!" I get up quickly as I see anger come over his face. I make a bee-line for the door, than I walk home, just to find Haymitch over the table. Drunk.

;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;four months later;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

It's been four whole months since I've seen Finnick, it seems like forever. But Peeta helps me when I'm sad, I go and visit him. Well, I go and visit him every day. But there's something else that's been helping me get through my crappy life now. Alcohol. I mean, I don't get drunk or anything, not much. But it's just, when something won't get out of my mind, the liquor makes it go away. I understand why my father drinks now. He doesn't know I've started, but he has been suspecting someone has been stealing from us.

That's what I'm doing now. Drinking. Haymitch is at the Hob. Drinking. So I'm alone at home, once again. Drinking. I tilt up the bottle as Finnick comes to my mind, I know this thought will make me nothing but depressed. It burns going down my throat, the white liquor burns my throat so I focus on that pain. Not on Finnick. I like it, how it makes me forget. What I don't like is thinking how soon this will just be coming right back out of my system, just the way it got down too. To get that thought out, I drink more.

I hear the door open and shove the bottle into a drawer, I'll clean it later. Haymitch walks in.

"Hi Haymitch!" I greet him.

"Hey, ready for the Capital thing?" he asks. Capital thing? Um, no.

"Oh yeah, when is it?" I ask. Haymitch goes and turns on the television, "Now"

I go and sit next to him on the couch. One good thing, since Haymitch smells of liquor, he won't notice if I do. Soon President Snow is on screen. He holds a rolodex in front of him.

"Hello Panem! As you know, we sadly didn't have a victor this year, but our ancestors planned for everything, so they ruled that, if there ever isn't a victor, we will have an alternate Game. An extra Hunger Games to be played when the victor tour would be."

What! No, not another Games, I can't go back there so soon, I can't go back to that hotel every night. Extra kids can't be reaped. I'm sobbing into my hands when Snow continues. Haymitch rubs my back.

"But we have a twist for each, that is what we find out tonight!" he booms, I hear the Capital citizens who are present cheer him on. I look up and watch his hand reach and take out a card. I feel my face wash white as I read a single word on the card before he turns it so the people watching from home can't read it.

It said victors.

**Fangirl rant: OH MY GOD I LOVE JOSH HUTCHERSON! AHHHHHHHHH I WATCHED HIS INTERVIEW ON ELLEN AND WHEN THEY ANNOUNCED HIS NAME I DIDN'T REALIZE I WAS CHEERING AND CLAPPING UNTIL MY BROTHER TOLD ME TO SHUT UP! .GOD. I LOVE THAT BOY SO MUCH! AND THE OTHER DAY I WATCHED ANOTHER INTERVIEW AND HE SAID HE DOESN'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND RIGHT NOW, I COULDN'T HELP CHEERING TO THAT TOO! MOST OF MY FRIENDS ARE REALIZING MY LITTLE OBSESSION AFTER I WAS LIKE YEAH HIS BIRTHDAY IS OCTOBER 12****TH**** HE'S FROM UNION KENTUCKY, HE WAS HOMESCHOOLED, HE HAS TWO DOGS, HE PLAYS BASKETBALL, ANDDDDDDD I SHOWED MY FRIEND ALL FORTY PICTURES I HAVE OF HIM ON MY IPOD! OHHHHHH JOSH I LOVE YOU! Just had to get that out of me XD. Oh sorry this was so short, I was in a rush and wanted to get it up. But the next chapter is going to be really long, I promise :D**


	13. Chapter 13: Reaped

**Grr at school now there's this thing with me and my friends. They claim that Peeta is gay, HE IS NOT! Ugh they tell me every day and I just tell them to shut up. Then I think about Finnick. Enjoy this chapter!**

-Rachel:

Victors? What about us? What do we have to do with these Games?

"These Games will have a twist, as I said before." Snow comments after he reads the card to himself. "The Seventy Fourth Hunger Games will be played with only twelve tributes,"

Okay, so one tribute from each District, but what does it have to do with victors!

"Each tribute will be the youngest victor from th-"

I'm out the door before I even hear him finish the sentence. No, no, no I can't go back in there, I can't no, I won't. I run through town, ignoring peacekeepers as they yell at me to halt. I don't know where I'm going; I don't really care where I'm going right now. I just run, I run and run and when I stop I'm deep in the woods. I don't remember going under the fence, but apparently I did. I can't go back in there and kill victors, kill my friends.

Finnick, I feel my heart start to race. Finnick. Is he in these too! I go through the District Four victors in my head: Mags, Finnick, Annie, Waves, Havet, and there's someone else. So far Annie is the youngest, that's good, Finnick's not in. But there's someone else from Four. Oh right, Skitt, he's the youngest. He's only twenty.

I climb in a tree to figure out who my competition will be. Gloss from One, Lyme from Two, Lyn from Three, Skitt from Four, Dillad from Five, Pren from Six, Johanna from Seven, Brandon from Eight, Cariad from Nine, Tir from Ten, Blight from Eleven, and then me from Twelve. I know all of them; I've spoken to all of them. Gloss won't be hard to kill, I don't like her; Lyme annoys me too. Lyn isn't bad; I'll kill her without hesitation though if I have too. I can see if Skitt wants to make an alliance, we're somewhat friends. Dillad and Pren are best buddies; they'll make an alliance for sure, so I should stay away from them. Johanna, oh god, I can't kill her, not in a million years. We'll make an alliance, than at like the final four we'll split, if we get that far. Brandon is big and strong, snapped the head off of a tribute in his Games, maybe I can ally with him as well. Cariad and Tir aren't that bad, they keep to themselves though. Blight from Eleven is my friend, Chaff's tribute too, so I can't kill him. And then there's me, who I know no matter how much I tell myself otherwise, when it comes down to it. When I'm in there with my life on the line, I'll kill any one of them without thinking twice, that includes Johanna. I have to say, these Games will be interesting, there are no secrets, everyone knows everyone else's strong and weak points. Everyone is an experienced killer, everyone has taken a life before, every one won't hesitate.

;;;;;;;;;;;;::::::::::::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

-Finnick:

I go and sit on my couch as the television comes on automatically. I see President Snow come on and he greets the nation. My thoughts drift to Rachel, as they do every day, she'll be watching this now at home with Haymitch.

"The Seventy Fourth Hunger Games will be played with only twelve tributes," I hear Snow say. What? Twelve, that's only one from each District, Awesome, twelve lives saved, a grin spreads across my face. So far this day has been going pretty well, my fishing net didn't get caught in the boat motor again, so that was the first good thing. Now this, it's great.

"Each tribute will be the youngest victor from their District."

My jaw drops open as I widen my eyes at the screen. No! No! Not this, he can't do that! That's the deal if you win once, you don't have to go back in, that's the deal. I feel my face go bone white as I remember who the youngest victor of District Twelve is.

"No! She can't go back in!" I scream.

"The tributes will be reaped next week, if they want to older victors may volunteer for the younger. I assure you these Games will be the best yet!" Snow smiles happily, Capital symbol, program over. _Victors may volunteer. Victors may volunteer._ It rings over and over again in my head. I can volunteer for Skitt, I can go in there again, and I can protect her. But I need to find out how she is. I go to my phone and dial the number for her house. It rings for a while before someone picks up.

"Whadda you want," Haymitch slurs from the other end, clearly drunk.

"Where is she!" I demand.

"Rachel?" he asks.

"No your cat" I snap back sarcastically.

"I don't have a cat" Haymitch burps after his sentence.

"Ugh of course I meant Rachel you drunkard!"

"Oh of course, I don't know, she ran out right when Snow said youngest victors, she was gone before he finished the sentence."

"Than what are you doing home! Go find her!" I yell.

"Finnick is the line safe?" he asks, suddenly sounding sober.

"Yeah, I got a friend who works on them, any calls to me are private." I say casually, it's true though; no peacekeepers can tap into my phone, made that arrangement a couple weeks ago.

"Okay good, cause we're going to get those victors out. And don't you dare volunteer, it'll kill her. I'm part of a rebel council, so are some gamemakers, we can break them out of the arena, than take them safe to District Thirteen, from there we start a rebellion."

What the hell? Rebel council? With gamemakers on it? Breaking them out of the arena, and District Thirteen, they were destroyed years ago right at the end of the Dark Days, right before the Games.

"That makes no sense, there is no Thirteen." I grumble.

Over the next hour Haymitch explains how that he's been attending meetings when he is mentoring, they're late at night, so no one notices he's gone. Only he, Chaff, Seeder, Beetee, and a most other victors know, because they're on the council. They've been planning to start a rebellion with the help of District Thirteen, which was destroyed, on the outside. I'm told they live underground now, they have a civilization, they will help us bring down the Capital. He tells me of upset in each District, how people want the Capital gone.

Okay, I've heard talk on some of the fishing boats of rebellion, but never actually action. I guess that makes sense.

"Will you tell Rachel this?" I ask.

"No, no one will, if she knows, she may act differently, we can't have that, someone may get suspicious. But most of the other victors know of it, all that are in these Games know, except my daughter. Everyone will try and keep her alive, so you don't need to go in Finnick, they'll try and get her out. She will be the face of this, the whole rebellion, because she has a natural hatred towards the Capital, she proved that already."

I remember how she spoke out and blamed the Capital for the Games, for murdering children.

"Okay, I'm joining this council thing though. Is she back yet?" I ask.

"No, I'll ask her friends to check the woods, it's getting dark. I have to go Finnick. I'll see you soon." Haymitch grumbles.

"Okay bye future father-in-law" I joke, I do plan on marrying Rachel hopefully one day.

"Don't push it you asshole" he spits than hangs up. I manage a little laugh.

We'll get them out, we can, and we have too. Then it's down with the Capital, down with this hellish government.

;;;;;;::::::::;;;;;;

-Rachel:

It's around midnight when I finally climb out of my tree. Haymitch will be worried, especially when he sent Katniss out to find me. I saw her, I heard her call my name, looking for me. I ignored her than, I didn't feel like talking than. She gave up about two hours ago. I let myself drop the ten feet down to the dirt, I land with a thud. I take off running back to the fence, wow, I went really far out.

It must be almost two when I finally make my way up the steps to the front door. I swing open the front door and wipe off my feet. Their covered in dirt since I didn't put shoes on before I left. Haymitch is out like a light on the table, dead to the world, as always. I go and pry the halfway empty/halfway full bottle in his hand out and take a seat across from him. I tip the bottle back and let it burn down my throat. I don't care anymore if he sees me drinking. I'll be dead soon anyways.

Soon, I'm drunk, and soon, Haymitch wakes up. I know he's up when I feel myself get smacked upside the head and he's trying to take away the bottle. I sit up quickly and chug the remainder of the white liquor.

"Ha!" I laugh at my father.

"What are you doing!" He demands, I go and toss the bottle across the room, it shatters against the wall.

"I _was _drinking, but now I'm out." I push back and stand up from my chair. Too fast, I move too fast, and soon I'm vomiting onto the living room floor. It burns my throat coming up, and tastes horrible. I gag when I'm finished.

"Not too fun is it!" Haymitch sneers. I glare at him.

"I done it before, a lot actually, that why your liquor keep disappearing when you gone." I can't talk strait either now.

"You've been drinking!" he bellows. I sit on the floor against a wall; I raise my hand and give him thumbs up. "Why the hell would you!" I simply point at him. I don't see his expression, since I'm hanging my throbbing head between my knees, trying to black out the world. But I can hear he's hurt when he speaks again. "Oh, right." I feel him start to rub my back, no longer angry at me.

;;;;;;;;;;;;;::::::::::week later:::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

-Rachel:

I don't get why I have to stand here, and wait for Effie to read my name. Why do they even have a reaping ball? It looks ridiculous with only one slip of paper in it, and that one has my name on it. Still, the square is packed tight all around me with people. I wait up front; in my own little roped off area. I rub the side of my throbbing head; I drank last night, a lot. I still have a hangover too, ugh I hate them. I wait patiently as the Mayor of District Twelve reads the Treaty of Treason, to remind us all why we're here. It's stupid, but everything that has to do with the Capital is stupid. Than Effie is introduced as she comes up.

"Ladies first!" She says, not happily. I get a wonderful idea.

I go and let myself out of the roped area and step past the peacekeepers. "I'll save you some time Effie!" I call so everyone can hear as I stagger up the stage without my name being called. I go and stand before my District and give a smile, I locate Katniss and Gale, Gale gives me thumbs up for my rebel move. Effie doesn't even ask for volunteers, my adopted father is a guy, so he can't volunteer for me. I don't want him to either, it may sound crazy(but I am crazy so it doesn't really matter) but I'm kinda looking forward to going back in, I can be myself, I can be who they created me to be. A killer, I can mock the Capital all I want and I'll go down strong.

Effie takes my hand and raises it high. "I give you, our District Twelve tribute and victor of the Seventy-Second Hunger Games, Rachel Abernathy!" I raise my head higher, no one claps for me. Because we all know the truth, I'm not coming home, not this time.

It doesn't take long for the square to empty after that. I am taken to my train, no goodbye's this year.

Once aboard the train I go to the sitting room and turn on the television to watch the recap of the reapings with Haymitch. He hands me a bottle, it's not full, but it's better than nothing.

"That's your last one for a while" he tells me.

"Okay." I grumble, I understand why, there's no use if I go back in and I'm drunk.

-Finnick:

I sink back into the couch next to Skitt.

"The wheels on the train go round and round, round and round, round and round, the wheels on the train go round and round off to the Capital we go." I muse softly; Skitt rolls his eyes at me.

"One, this isn't really something to be singing about, and two, the train doesn't even have wheels." Skitt grumbles, we don't really care much for each other, since we're exact opposites.

I'm tall, blond, and gorgeously handsome. He's short, black haired, and average in looks. I'm funny but can be serious when it's needed. He's overly serious and can't take a joke. I'm great at talking to girls. Skitt can't really do that to save his life. I'm a trident master (if I may say so myself) and Skitt doesn't even know how to hold one. This is ironic since he's from District Four, but he worked in making the tridents not using them. Everyone wasn't surprised when I won, everyone was totally surprised when Skitt won by proving he's probably the deadest person on the planet with a knife in his hand.

"Shut up Skitt" I groan, turning my attention back to the reapings, they're showing District Ten right now. I watch as Tir takes his place on stage, it shows him shake hands with the mayor of his district and then it goes right into District Eleven. Minutes later it shows Blight take the stage, with much cementation that he may be deadly this year by the broadcasters. They're right, he is one of the youngest out of the young, and he's still fit too. Chaff got lucky with him.

Then it shows District Twelve, just as they mayor finishes the Treaty of Treason. Tears fill my eyes when they show Rachel standing alone in a roped off area. I sit forward though, studying her. She looks, different, like nothing big is happening at all. She doesn't care if anything, she looks amused. A smug little grin crosses her face as I hear Effie announce. "Ladies first!"

The commentators are wondering why she doesn't look baffled or sad or anything like most of the other victors did. The only other tributes to act like this way were Johanna, and well, she's a piece of work all in her own, and Skitt, because he's a creepo anyways and rarely shows emotion.

My mouth falls open and the commentators fall silent as Rachel goes and pushes out of her roped off area, where she is supposed to stay.

"I'll save you some time Effie!" She calls out so everyone can hear as she staggers to the stage. Is she drunk? It sure looks like she is, but she's never had any liquor in her life, well, as far as I know she hasn't. I hope she hasn't. I know her life is hell right now, but she can't turn to a bottle, god I just hope.

I watch as Effie nods and Rachel takes her place. Effie presents her and raises her hand, her District is silent, no one claps. She's so calm, she must think that she won't come out, since she doesn't know about the plan. The Capital seal goes up, the anthem plays, and then the screen goes black.

"Well, I don't think we need to do anything, just do what you did before in the arena, just, keep her safe and alive." I tell Skitt, he knows about the plan to get the victors out too. He plays a big part in it too, he just shrugs at me.

"Yeah, I know, I'll keep your girl live."

"You better Skitt, you better." I say sternly while I glare at him.

**Hope you liked it! In the next chapter we fly through training and get scores and stuff, oh and opening ceremonies. If you have any ideas for the story please voice them Maybe I'll use them. **


	14. Chapter 14: Ring

-Rachel:

We arrive late in the Capital, I'm told we just had stopped to refuel, but refueling usually doesn't take three hours. I'm sure it's because they don't want me seeing a certain someone. So right away I'm given over to Cinna, who only gets two out his usual five hours he gets to prepare me for tonight's opening ceremonies. Cinna and the prep team get right to work on me.

"So, what's my costume this year?" I ask Cinna as he carefully straitens and then curls my hair. He's helping the prep team to make up for lost time. He leans close to my ear.

"I want to show them what you've become" he tells me gently. I give him a confused look, so he explains further. "I'm going to let them see your scars."

"Oh." Is all I can say.

An hour and a half later I'm alone in the room with Cinna, he hands me a two piece garment. Black, skin tight shorts and a top garment that basically just looks like a sports bra. I put them on and ask how this goes with coal mining, since the costumes must represent the districts main industry. "Watch" he grins and goes over and turns off the lights, he presses a button on a remote and my outfit comes to life. Streaks of red, orange, and yellow fly across the clothing, than one color disappears and another instantly replaces it. I look alive; I look like I'm afire. But what I really notice in the mirror is that every time a new color comes, it gives off light, which reveals another sign of what I've been put through.  
>Each streak shows a scar, each scar tells a story, each story is of how the Capital punishes us. The audience will just see an abused body, the victors will see someone standing up and not being ashamed of what's been done to them, the Capital will see a rebel. But the overall appearance is the same, it's breathtaking. "Do you like it?" Cinna asks as he looks at me in the mirror.<p>

"It's extraordinary, as always." I tell him.

"Thank you, now let's get you down there, we start in five minutes."

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Ten minutes later I'm standing in my carriage, but tonight, I'm alone. Peeta isn't here for me to hold on too, he's not here to help me. So as I come into view of the citizens of the Capital, I raise my head high and I'm not ashamed of the tears that go down my face. I know when I'm seen, because the whole crowd goes silent. I hear the first gasps as a streak of red highlights a scar that runs down my side. More colors reveal more to these people, more to the Capital citizens. I don't expect what happens next, I don't even know how they got the idea to start it. But first one chants it, than the rest of the crowd joins in.

"Long live Peeta! Long live Peeta!" they chant as one, more tears come from my eyes. I put three fingers to my lips and then extend them to the sky, I extend them to the heavens, I extend them to the boy I loved. Everyone does the same.

I stand stiffly for the rest of the ride until I pass by President Snow's mansion, where he himself is standing outside to watch. I turn and nod gruffly to him, he returns it. But I can tell he's infuriated at how his citizens reacted to me, he's infuriated at my costume. I've shown him and the nation something, I've shown him that all victors or at least me, have power, that we have the power to influence a nation.

When we arrive back to the Training Tower I happily hop out of my chariot, I'm surrounded by the other victors. Johanna has a smug smile on her face as she comes over and slaps me good-naturedly on the back. "Good going kid, great job!" she laughs.

"Thanks, it felt great." I grin. I eagerly accept congratulations from the other victors, than I hear him.

"Rachel!" I haven't heard that voice in months, and it makes my stomach twist in anticipation of seeing his face again. It's Finnick. And I realize something else, the Capital can't punish me for seeing him now, I'll be going in the arena, they can punish me then.

"Finn!" I call out as I push through the other victors, I see him walking briskly over. I'm not that good at self-control, so I run full out to him, I run to him like I did when I was ten. It seems like forever until I reach him and jump into his arms. He holds me off my feet and I wrap my arms around his neck, my legs wrap around his waist, he buries his face in my hair. "Finn" I whisper, he pulls back so I stare into his eyes. "I missed you," I tell him, he puts a finger on my lips.

"Don't talk." He replaces his finger with his lips. Somehow Finnick ends up leaning his back against a wall as he continues to kiss me. Soon though, he holds me, our foreheads together.

"At least I get to see you as much as I want since I'm a tribute." I giggle.

"And when you come out." He tells me.

"I may not win Finn," I grumble as he puts me down so I'm standing on my feet, I've pulled back from him, but my arms are still around his neck.

"You're going to leave me alone?" he whines. I kiss him again.

"Not if I can help it" I promise.

"Good" he starts to kiss me again, I feel his tongue go along my lips, and I let him in. He groans and I manage a little laugh. I only get to make out with Finnick for about thirty seconds before I hear a voice whisper behind us.

"I think you two should wait till later, or Haymitch is gunna have a heart attack." It's Seeder's voice. I pull away from Finnick to look at her, I see Haymitch in the background, his face is beat red and he's just glancing everywhere, not knowing where to look without watching Finnick and I. I can't help laughing at his awkwardness. I take Finnick's hand and we go over to him and the other victors.

"Ugh, hey Finnick" Haymitch clearly still feels awkward in this, and everyone can tell. Finnick finds this not awkward at all as he wraps his arm around my waist.

"Hi Haymitch." He smiles smugly as Haymitch's eyes lock on his arm around me, at us standing so close together. Finnick catches on steps a little bit away from me, Haymitch nods approvingly. My ear tickles when Finnick whispers to me, "I feel like I'm going through boyfriend inspection here" I burst out laughing.

"Technically you are"

"So, Rachel, you should get to bed, early start tomorrow for training. Meet me for breakfast in the morning." My father instructs.

"Will do daddy-o" I agree, I say my goodnights to everyone else. Finnick turns with me as I turn to leave.

"Where are you going Finnick?" Haymitch asks, Finnick stiffens as he turns around.

"I'm walking her back to her room, ya know, in case someone jumps her or something."

"She can handle herself if that happens." My father points out.

"Ya but say she's jumped by a giant fish and can't handle the smell while I-"

"Fine! Go!"

"Thank you Haymitch" Finnick takes my hand and we continue walking, before we get to the elevator he picks me up off my feet. "Where we going?" Finnick asks me when we're the only ones in our elevator.

"Your room?" I suggest.

"Okay, can you stay all night or-"I cut him off with a kiss.

"I'm sure I can"

When we get to Finnick's room he sets me down on the bed.

"Stay here, real quick I need to get something." He smiles at me. I nod, as I watch him go into the bathroom I start to sing again.

_"Heart beats fast  
>Colors and promises<br>How to be brave  
>How can I love when I'm afraid to fall<br>But watching you stand alone  
>All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow <em>

_One step closer _

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more<em>

_Time stands still  
>Beauty in all she is<br>I will be brave  
>I will not let anything take away<br>What's standing in front of me  
>Every breath<br>Every hour has come to this _

_One step closer"_

Finnick comes back in and smiles at me, he just stands there, watching and listening to me. I finish the song for him.

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more <em>

_And all along I believed I would find you  
>Time has brought your heart to me<br>I have loved you for a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more<em>

_One step closer  
>One step closer <em>

_I have died every day waiting for you  
>Darling don't be afraid I have loved you<br>For a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more <em>

_And all along I believed I would find you  
>Time has brought your heart to me<br>I have loved you for a thousand years  
>I'll love you for a thousand more"<em>

Finnick comes over and takes my face in his hands, he kisses me. Than pulls back and takes my hands in his and gazes into my eyes.

"I love you," he tells me

"I know that Finn, and I love you"

"I know, and if we were back in District Four, I'd meet you there. We would've become friends, and eventually I would begin to court you,"

What, what is he telling me? Why is he telling me this?

"I would always be with you, one day I would take your father out fishing, and then during the trip, while we are out on the water, I would ask him if I could marry you. But here, we're different, I met you here, loved you as a sister, which grew into something so much more. And you know your all I think about, and I don't care if Snow or anyone else says we can't or it isn't possible given we're from two different districts. But I want you to be mine; I want to be yours, until we die." Finnick digs in his pocket and pulls out a silver ring.

It's not a normal ring though; the whole thing is pure silver, except for one of the two dolphins. At the top of the ring there are the two dolphins, intertwined, their tails wrapping around each other, one is gold, the other silver like the rest of the sphere. It's beautiful.

"Will you marry me?" Finnick asks as he moves down to one knee. I purse my lips together as a huge grin comes over my face. I can't help but think of Peeta, but he would want this, he wants me to be happy.

"Yes, a trillion times yes." I tell Finnick before I go and wrap my arms around his neck again; he starts to kiss my neck. "Finn, let's go now, get married now, just in case." I want to be his wife as soon as I can. In case I don't make it out of the arena. He pulls back and slips the ring on my finger. Then he takes my hand in his and pulls me up to my feet.

"Okay, follow me." He grins slyly at me, which makes me laugh.

I follow Finnick as we practically run down the hallways. We go to the victor's room to see if anyone is there, we do need a witness for this. There aren't many victor's still here, but we manage to track down Seeder.

"Seeder, could you be a witness, Finn and I are going to get married, now." I ask quickly, I'm lucky Haymitch isn't here, but it would be disastrous if he shows up now.

"Oh I'm so happy for you two! Of course I will!"

With that the three of us go through the Capital streets as Finnick leads on to a marriage building. And with Seeder acting as witness, and one man conducting a simple ceremony. Within an hour of Finnick asking me, I'm his wife. And I'm Rachel Odair.

**Yeah! Wow this chapter turned out a lot different than planned; I didn't even plan ahead for Finnick's proposal. Well anyways, next chapter people start to notice the ring that's on her finger, including Haymitch, I doubt he'll like this very much. Oh, I couldn't really describe the ring so here's a like to what it looks like! .com/hi/img/c/0/0/4e/7/AAAADMoLRU0AAAAAAE5_?v=1243298627000 **


	15. Chapter 15: A stalling chapter

**I have an official Josh Hutcherson obsession. XD I got a twitter the other day JUST so I could follow his real twitter account 333. Also on my Ipod I gots a whole album filled with just pics of him, so far I've got 50, newly updated I found a new facebook josh fan page, I now have 84 saved pics. My phone background is him, my Ipod lock screen is him, and my Ipod home screen is him. Oh and my computer background is him. I saw a trailer for a movie he's in and he was crying and I started to cry too. :,(**

**So anyways enjoy this chapter!**

-Rachel:

Finnick pulls away from me but holds me close to him. He's still in jeans and a t-shirt, I'm still in my opening ceremonies costume, but they're now our wedding garments too.

"Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Odair" the man who conducted the ceremony nods to us, a smile on his face. We both thank him. Than Seeder comes over and engulfs me in a hug.

"I'm so proud of you! Oh Haymitch will be so happy!" She laughs.

Fucking shit asses, my father. He doesn't know. Whoops, well, I did think of telling him, but I figured Finnick didn't want to be beaten up right now. I turn to Finnick.

"Haymitch doesn't know does he?" I ask.

"Ugh, no. How about we keep it that way until after the Games?" he suggests.

"What! You two didn't ask her father!" Seeder interrupts.

"no" Finnick and I say in unison.

"Well, I won't tell, that'll be my marriage gift to you both, but you do have to tell him eventually." She sighs

"We will, I can't hide this forever." I smile as I show off my ring again; Finnick tilts my head up so he can kiss me.

"No you can't." he laughs.

"Well come on, you little lady have training in the morning." Seeder takes on role of our mother as she ushers us out of the building and back to the training tower.

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I walk down to breakfast before training the next morning with Finnick; he holds my left hand, so no one can see the ring.

"Really, I wouldn't have minded if you took it off just for now so Haymitch doesn't see." He whispers in my ear, I smile up at him.

"I'm _never _taking it off." He grins and shrugs.

"You're lucky he's not here yet," he glances around the room. "Oh but Chaff is." I follow his gaze and see Chaff waving us over. We go over and sit next to him.

"Morning children!" he greets us, I roll my eyes at him. "Its serve yourself today." He informs us, I nod and lets my hand slip through Finn's as I go to get my food. I instantly shove my left hand in my pocket, just so Chaff doesn't notice. I hear Finnick laugh and I look back and give him a warning glance, he shuts up instantly. I go over to the table and start to fill my plate, I'm very happy to see they have my favorite out, tomatoes, we don't get them in Twelve very often. But sadly, I'll need two hands to get them. Great, should I risk someone seeing the ring, or get my delicious tomatoes. My stomach wins out.

I take out my hand and go to grab a fork to get my tomatoes. _Shit. _That's what I think instantly as a big dark hand grasps my wrist. It's Chaff's hand. I look up to his face and smile at him. His eyes are fixed on the ring. His mouth is open, his eyes confused.

"Chaff?" I ask him softly, he's cutting off circulation in my hand. He doesn't respond to my words, just keeps staring. "Chaffy?" still no response. "Chaffster?" This isn't good. "Chaff, I'd prefer it if I don't lose a hand like you did." This gets to him and his grip loosens.

"Rachel Abernathy your fath-" he starts but I cut him off, may as well tell Chaff.

"Correction, Rachel Odair." I giggle a little at him.

Chaff doesn't say a word, but ends up glancing between Finnick, me, and the ring on my finger. Once Finnick notices this he comes over and puts his arm around me. "Don't you want to congratulate us?" Finnick has the biggest smile on his face I've ever seen.

"If this is some joke then I think you've taken it a bit too far" Chaff finally tells us.

"No joke, ask Seeder, she was witness." I smile and kiss Finnick, he manages to get in another three kisses before we turn back to Chaff.

"Well….I'm guessing that since your still alive Finnick that Haymitch doesn't know."

"Affirmative and we're not going to let him know, at least until after the Games."

"Well, have fun with telling him about this when you do." Chaff laughs, he turns and goes off to Seeder, we watch them for a minute before Seeder breaks out laughing and nods.

By the end of breakfast, almost every victor knows about Finnick and me, and since everyone enjoys seeing Haymitch in a total father phase, and when he finds out this will defiantly be the biggest, everyone agrees not to tell him. Even the Careers agree to this. After everyone congratulates us they talk me into just keeping the ring in my pocket for breakfast. Just so Haymitch doesn't see.

The rest of breakfast goes smoothly, except for when Haymitch first came in and yelled at Finnick for kissing me too much at the table. He only kissed me twice.

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Training goes very well for the rest of the day, we don't train at all. We are dismissed to go to the stations, and then all the victors just gather in a group and talk the whole day. Once in a while someone will start to argue over who has the better skills and then they will go show off, but other than that, we do absolutely nothing.

"I mean really, there's no point to training this year, it's not like we're going to learn anything new in two days, we already know everything." Johanna points out to Pren, who asked if we should at least train a little bit. Pren grins.

"Let's play a game then, truth or dare!" he announces to the group.

Ten minutes later we're all sitting in a circle and know how to play. Pren starts us off.

"District Twelve, truth or dare?" he asks.

"Truth" I groan, I really don't want to play, but it's either play or standalone like a pariah.

"You slept with your hubby, like _slept slept_." He hints, obviously meaning if I've had sex with Finnick.

"Isn't that a personal thing" I point out.

"That's why he's asking dumbass." Gloss mutters under her breath.

"Fine, yes I have. Ugh, Johanna truth or dare?"

"Dare me sucker." She grins.

"hmm, go kiss that peacekeeper over there." I point to a peacekeeper who's standing by himself by the exit door. Johanna shrugs and goes up to him, she grabs his face and kisses him smack on the lips. The peacekeeper looks like he's just been shot while we all can't stop laughing as Johanna comes back and joins the circle.

So for the rest of training that day, and the next, we busy ourselves with doing nothing but playing pointless games. And hiding from Haymitch the fact that Finnick is his son-in-law now. So now I wait as Blight leaves to go do his private training session with the gamemakers. I have no idea what I'm going to do, I guess I'll just do flips or something, I've been practicing those.

So that's what I do when I get in, I run and do flips and other aerobatic moves through the air. Then I leave, without getting dismissed.

"I'm done now, so I'll be going" I call to the gamemakers when I've had enough of myself. They just stare at me as I leave.

I easily find Cinna waiting for me as I exit. He wraps me into a tight hug. "Someone told me your married now." He whispers into my ear, I smile at him and show him my ring, which I've had on ever since breakfast ended. "Oh, it will go nicely with your dress for tonight." He puts his arm over my shoulders and escorts me down to the prep room. Tonight is the interviews, and tonight I plan to tell everyone, including Haymitch, about how Finnick and I are married. Haymitch's reaction on live television will be priceless.

All too soon I'm overtaken by my prep team who make my skin as flawless as they can, they can't get rid of the scars still on my body. That's another good thing; I haven't been called away to the hotel. That doesn't mean I haven't been doing what I do there anyways, Finnick and I don't waste one night together since they may be our last.

Two hours later I stand, eyes closed, while Cinna puts the dress on me.

"Okay, now you can open." I can hear the smile in his voice.

I open my eyes and gasp. The dress is beautiful, no, it's breathtaking. It's a strapless dress, which runs down to the floor and has an opening so I can easily walk. The top of the dress is coal black, but as you look down it turns to a fiery red, and then snow white. Very faint streaks of gold are mixed with the black; tears fill my eyes as I remember the dress I wore right after I won the games. My first dress I wore while mourning over Peeta, it looked like this.

"I wanted them to see how you're a fighter, you started weak, then progressed into something beautiful. And even though you haven't moved on so to speak, you've followed your heart, and now you're married." Cinna whispers into my ear. "Oh! We need this now don't we?" he slips my wedding ring onto my finger and I turn and give him a hug again.

"Thank you, for everything."

"My pleasure" he laughs. "Now come on, Finnick wants to meet up with you so he can wait with you until District Ten goes up." I nod and Cinna takes me to Finnick, who immediately kisses me over and over again. He stares deep into my eyes.

"You ready to find out if Haymitch will kill me?" he laughs

"He can try, but I won't let him." I promise Finnick. But who knows, Haymitch is pretty hard to predict sometimes.

**Duh duh, duh duh, duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duhhhhh Haymitch finds out next chapter!**


	16. Chapter 16: Father Problems

**Note to readers: I've started another story too, Fire Hearts, which is basically about a girl who was part of a notorious gang in the Capital shortly after Snow is killed. She meets Gale, who is working in D2. So updates may slow down a bit for this story, but I'll try my best to evenly contribute to both :D. **

**On another note; anyone want to co-write a story? I'm thinking that may be fun to try. So anyways enjoy this (hopefully funny) chapter!**

-Rachel:

Finnick stands behind me, his arms around my waist, as we stand before a television watching the interviews as we wait for my turn. Gloss struts out onto the stage and everyone goes crazy, she's beautiful, I'll give her that.

She and Caesar talk about her life as a victor, she earned herself an eight in training and she finishes her interview by saying how very sad she is that the citizens of Panem will be losing so many wonderful victors. During her interview Lyme also says how sad she will be to not be able to come visit the Capital after the Games, and how she always thought winning meant not going in the arena again. Lyn moves the crowd to tears as she tells Caesar about her six month old son that she will be leaving behind. Skitt reads a poem about the ocean and says how sad he is that he will most likely never see it again. Dillad and Pren say how hard these Games will be, since all the victors are friends, how they aren't looking forward to killing their friends.

By the time District Ten comes up the crowd is a mess already, many people calling for the Games to be called off. The people don't want to lose their victors; they don't want to lose their celebrities. Finnick kisses my cheek, reminding me he has to go now.

"Go tell'em beautiful" he whispers in my ear. I turn so my arms go around his neck and I kiss him again.

"I will, you stay away from my father." I warn him.

"Oh I will" he laughs and kisses me one last time before he leaves; I fumble with the ring on my finger.

Tir tells the audience to how he will miss their hospitality. "But I get to go back in the arena hay" he chuckles. Caesar doesn't comment, he's been having a rough night too. I nod to Blight as he goes on stage following Tir. I go and wait by the curtain; soon it will be my time. Blight himself earns a nine in training, which isn't surprising; in his first Games he got a ten. Blight moves the audience to further tears when he says his mother is on her death bed. "I think she may die while I'm in the arena, I'm saying goodbye to her tonight" he says solemnly

"We all feel for you." Caesar says, tears in his eyes. Blight nods as his buzzer goes off, Caesar recomposes himself and the audience as I walk out on stage, Blight grins at me.

"Knock Haymitch dead." He grins.

"And now we have District Twelve's Rachel Abernathy." Caesar introduces me by the wrong name. I giggle as I sit across from him, I find Finnick in the crowd, and I locate Haymitch, who is about twenty feet away from Finnick.

"I'm afraid you got my name wrong Caesar." I laugh, instant confusion, I watch as Haymitch's eyes go wide.

"Hm, no I didn't, it's always been Abernathy." Caesar is confused so he just laughs; I lift my left hand and show my ring. I see the cameras do a close up of it on the televisions in the Capital square. "Oh, when did you get that! And who's the lucky man?" Caesar asks. He doesn't seem to notice Haymitch, who is on his feet now, he's arguing with Chaff, who is laughing and trying to hold him down.

"Well, we tied the knot what, two days ago?" I call out to the crowd looking over to the victors, the camera pans over the victors. A huge smile goes over Finnick's face.

"Yeah Mrs. Odair, I'm pretty sure it was!" Finnick calls over, the cameras zoom in on Finnick, who is now blushing, and it does a side to side screen view of Finnick and I.

"Mrs. Odair?" Caesar smiles at me.

"Mrs. Rachel Odair." I confirm.

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"WHAT!" his scream rises out over everything else in the square, probably in the Capital, probably in the whole world. He's on his feet now, and to my horror, is strutting towards the stage. Oh God. "What do you mean Mrs. Odair! When the hell did you get married! Did I give you permission to get married! And to him! Of all people to Finnick! OH GOD RACHEL! Why am I finding out now, and on national television?" Haymitch rants on and on, he's already shoved his way past about ten peacekeepers and is now at the foot of the stage, glaring up at me, glaring at my ring. I smile at him.

"Did he know?" Caesar asks as Haymitch stands there, his face a brilliant red.

"Not until now, since I'm a victor I didn't need a signature from a guardian." I laugh. "It's just, when Finnick asked me, and I said yes, we ran off to do it right away, it was a private thing, only Seeder and the man doing the ceremony were there. I'm just glad I got to have these last few days and nights with him. That I got to be his before I go back in there tomorrow." Citizens of the Capital let out wails and gasps, people chant for an end to the Games. But we all know that won't happen.

"I still should've been told about this you know!" Haymitch yells again, I'm thinking he'll get worse when we're alone, for now, the buzzer sounds.

"Thank you for your time Rachel. You got an eleven in training by the way." Caesar hasn't been able to tell me yet. I nod my thanks as I stand and take my spot at the end of the stage, the other victors come on stage as we stand for the anthem. As it begins, I reach out for Blair's hand, he takes it without hesitation. The anthem blares louder as people call for an end to the Games. I look down the line, and one by one, each victor joins hands. We are one, we are an unbroken chain, linked, standing together, together against the Capital. Simultaneously, we all hold our joined hands in the air, so all can see. And then everything goes black as the lights are shut off, as the cameras and turned off.

;;;;;;;;;::::::::::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

Twenty minutes later I'm back with my husband on his floor of the Training Tower. We sit next to each other on the couch in the sitting room; my head rests on his shoulder as he holds me close to him. We're both waiting for what we know is coming; we're waiting for Haymitch to burst through the door any second.

"I think he took the news well personally." I whisper to Finnick.

"Yea, he did didn't he, I thought he'd scout me out right away." Finnick and I both laugh.

"I have to go back though in the morning." I say sadly, referring to the arena, this makes Finnick stiffen. He pulls me closer so my head rests on his chest and he plays with my hair.

"I should've volunteered, then I could keep you safe." He growls, I look up at him with my eyes.

"No you did the right thing, now there's a chance I'll get to come back to you."

"Yea, but I still have to go to my meetings while you're in there."

Right, meetings. I've thought about that already though, I know Finnick loves me. He's just doing what the Capital makes him do.

"I know you love me Finn"

"Yeah, and I'll be thinking of you the whole time." He promises me as he leans down and kisses my forehead.

"Same here" I put my hand on the back of his neck and make him come and kiss my lips. Our kiss is rudely interrupted though.

"Where's that son of a bitch cause I'm gunna make him swim with the fishes!" I hear the elevator door open as Haymitch yells and storms out into the hallway, Finnick pulls away and grins at me. We both look to the doorway as Haymitch storms up. "Get. Your Hands. Off. My Daughter." He fumes. Finnick starts to comply but I grab his arms and keep him in place, he doesn't object.

"Dad, I love Finnick." I say softly, maybe hearing it from me will go over better than Finnick talking.

"But you got _married_!" he yells as he comes closer. I look down at my ring then back to my furious father.

"Yes, I'm aware of that."

"Don't be a smart-ass to me" he snaps, this makes Finnick snap.

"Don't talk to her like that!" he growls from behind me. Haymitch's eyes narrow.

"You don't tell me what to do. Besides, I'm your father now too" I guess he has a point there. " Now, I want to get one thing strait! You!" he motions to Finnick, "Will _never _leave her!"

Finnick's jaw literally drops open in shock, "I would never think of- ugh Haymitch I'd never"

"Good! And you" he motions to me, "if he ever does anything to hurt you or anything! Leave!"

"Dad, I'll never leave Finn" Finnick would never hurt me.

"Anyways! I would of rathered you at least tell me! Or even ask me if you could do this! Not just go off and do it! I get that you wanted to do it right away, and you have a pretty damn good reason to too! But would it've been that hard to just find me first and ask! Hell, you could've even asked and done it anyways if I said fucking no!"

"You would've said no" I point out.

"Yeah but then I wouldn't be arguing like this! Because I wouldn't have any reason to be yelling at you!"

Wait. What?

"What?" Finnick asks confused, no reason to be yelling at us.

"Yes." Haymitch takes a breath and composes himself. "I can tell you love each other, everyone can tell that. And I knew sooner or later this would happen I hoped it wouldn't, but I knew it would. I know you'll take great care of her Finnick, probably better care than any other man would, because you know what she's been through. All that she's been through. And I don't really have any other things to be angry about other than I just don't like you in general. I personally think you're too happy all the time, but I can see you love each other. And I know her parents would approve if they were here too. And, I know Peeta would too."

Finnick slowly gets up from behind me. He goes and offers his hand to Haymitch, who, after a while, takes Finnick's hand and shakes it. "I'll take care of her, always."

**Hoped you liked it! I wanted to show that Haymitch actually has a soul and feelings here, hence the little speech thing he gave :] next chapter we begin the Games!**

**Mocking Verse**


	17. Chapter 17: Games begin

**Off to the arena we go! Please review, I love all my reviewers!**

-Rachel:

I'm pleasantly surprised when Haymitch leaves Finn and me only an hour later, I settle back into Finnick as he twirls my hair around his finger. Tonight may be the last night I get with him.

"I love you Finn" I tell him gently.

"I love you too."

"This may be our last night Finn,"

Before I know it I'm in his arms as he carries me off to his room, our room. He sets me gently down on the bed, "Then let's not waste anything second." He purrs to me, I lets him push me back gently as his lips collide with mine. Finnick starts to love me like it's the last day of our lives, which it very well may be.

I can tell he's still trying not to hurt me. "Finn" I whisper between his kisses. He stops; he thinks I'm being hurt.

"You okay?"

"Don't hold back Finnick."

"I may hurt you." He whispers to me, I pull him closer and kiss him again, harder than I ever have.

"You could never hurt me."

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The next morning I wake up with Finnick by my side. His arms encircle me, I don't want to get up, I want the sun to stop rising, but I know that won't happen. I need to report to medical so they can get a blood sample, make sure I'm completely healthy, and then I go off with Cinna to the arena.

"Finnick" I whisper, his hold tightens around me a little which makes me laugh. "I know, but I have to go."

"You'll come back to me won't you." He whispers

"Oh course I'll try too." I promise him, with that he lets me get up and change, he does the same.

Finnick stays with me the whole time, while they take my blood and while we go eat breakfast, he never lets go of my hand. But all too soon it's time for the tributes to say goodbye to their mentors, and Finnick has to let go to go speak with Skitt, and I have to say my final goodbye to my father. I go over and sit in front of him. We don't say anything, then I wrap my arms around his neck.

"I love you Haymitch." I say in his ear.

"I love you too Rach, I'm so proud of how you've grown up."

I pull back and he holds my hand in his. "I'll do all I can to get you out of there."

"I know you will," then I want him to tell me my favorite story he told me when I was little, I need to hear it, one last time. "Can you tell the story?" I ask.

"Oh course I will." Haymitch takes a breath before he starts. "I was sitting in the Hob, it wasn't very nice outside, another blizzard was starting up again. I looked up from my bottle as I heard the door swing open, I saw your father walk in, and he carried a bundle in his arms. Everyone surrounded him quickly, but I didn't go over to see, I didn't really care. But before I knew it I was there anyways, curiosity got the best of me. I saw he carried a baby with him, it was you. Your father was on cloud nine, you had just been born yesterday and he had wanted to bring you in to show everyone, but your mother had said the Hob was no place for a baby. He laughed that your mother was asleep now and he had to be back before she woke up. Everyone loved seeing you, we all had turns holding you too. Then I held you myself, I didn't care much for babies, but I couldn't help thinking how cute you were. Then the door of the Hob flew open about an hour later.

'Joel Shuba give me our daughter now!' your mother yelled as she burst in the Hob. Your father's face went snow white as she came over and grabbed you from him. She went off for about half an hour on how the Hob is no place for you and that it will scare you. She didn't even notice that you had fallen asleep during their fight. I was the one to point it out.

We all joked about how you would be a regular in the Hob, and sure enough, you were." Haymitch laughs at the end. It's one of my favorite stories, since it has my biological parents, and my parent.

"Thank you, do you have my token?" I ask him, I had given him my ring last night so it could also be my token. He nods and hands me a necklace, golden chain, the ring on the end. But there were other lockets on it too. Slowly I go through and open them. Each one holds a picture of a victor. Beetee, Chaff, Seeder, Finnick, Wiress, Annie, Ceier, Haymitch himself, and all the other victors and then one holds a picture of Peeta and I, smiling together. I'm rolling my eyes while Peeta seems to be laughing his head off, I remember when this was taken.

*Flashback*

"Why are we doing this again?" I ask Peeta for the millionth time as we pose in front of his brother Quil takes our picture for about the tenth time.

"Because pictures are so much fun!" he says sarcastically to me, "and I know you love them!"

I roll my eyes, "I _hate _pictures Peeta!"

"Which is why we're taking them, see this will be a great shot." Peeta strikes a ridiculous pose, putting his hand on his hip and his other hand under his chin. I just shake my head and stare at my best friend, he's crazy, yes, but I love him for it.

"Are we done yet Quil!" I demand after I at least smile so we can get one good picture.

"Nope" he grins at me.

"We can at _yeast _do three more." Peeta jokes, ugh I hate his baker jokes!

"Will you at least shut up." I hiccup when I say least so it sounds like I said yeast instead of least, which sends Peeta into laughing his head off.

"I knew you loaved them!" he holds his sides, I stare down at him and roll my eyes, I see the flash of the camera. Quil bursts out laughing,

"Now _that's _a keeper!"

"You both are pathetic"

*flashback end*

I hug my father again, "Thank you." He holds me in the hug as they announce it's time for the tributes to go. Eventually we separate and he walks me to the door, where I stand next to the rest of the tributes. Finnick runs over and kisses me one last time, he holds me close to him.

"Love always?" he whispers

"Always, take care of Haymitch and yourself, no matter what you see?" I ask.

"Of course." There're tears in his eyes now, the peacekeepers are calling him to get back in line with the mentors. He pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me. I bury my head in his chest, than a peacekeeper is pulling us apart. I go and stand in the tribute line.

Then, the two lines of victors face each other, Haymitch starts it first. He puts three fingers to his lips, touches his heart, and then extends them to us. Everyone in his line repeats the gesture. I bow my head slightly with everyone else as we accept their goodbye, their blessing. Then we are taken away, a way to go where we were promised we would never have to go again, away to the arena.

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Two hours later I'm waiting in my launch room, Cinna is in the room with me, holding my hands in his. He helped me dress and has explained that the clothes are water resistant, but they won't keep me warm.

I wear a skin tight long sleeved shirt, it's black and red, and has a twelve on the side. A burgundy jacket goes along with it. My pants are jeans, but made in waterproof materials. There are lots of pockets, which is good, I can keep weapons there. I can also secure my swords in the belt.

"I'm betting on you still" Cinna assures me. I just nod and take a bite of bread. I stand quickly and run to a corner, throwing up whatever I was able to eat that day. This alarms Cinna. "Quickly eat this," he offers me crackers, which I take and start to chew. I need food in me to start. But I only get two down before they're calling us to prepare for launch. I hug Cinna.

"Thank you Cinna."

"It's been my pleasure." He assures me as he escorts me to start on my metal plate.

I stand tall and look up as my plate begins to rise.

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A warm breeze goes gently across my face as I appear in the arena. I glance around at my surroundings. I see the cornucopia in the middle, overloaded with stuff for us. I can see most of the victors, but the confusing part is, about fifty feet behind us, the land ends. This can't be the end of the arena? It wouldn't even be fifteen square miles. I turn and look behind me, that's when I notice the tree line, oh, we're on a plateau. Now that my eyes have adjusted I can tell, the arena is big, woods are below the plateau, patches of hidden meadows are scattered throughout, and each meadow holds a pool of water right in the open.

"Welcome to the Seventy Fourth Hunger Games!" Claudious Templesmith's voice booms around me, I poise my feet to run to the cornucopia.

Ten

Nine

Eight

Seven

Six

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

The gong sounds and I'm off my plate first, sprinting towards the cornucopia, I reach it first. Weapons and packs, that's all there is. I grab three knives and two swords and a pack, and then I start to go around the horn. I run into Gloss first, whatever we had at the interviews is gone as our swords clash. It doesn't take long at all until my sword goes through her body and her cannon goes off. Once again I make the first kill in my Games. I hear footfalls and turn, my sword tip rests against Skitt's throat, as his sword rests against my own.

"Good thing we're allies right?" he breaths out.

"Right, we should get outta here, I don't like it much." I laugh.

"Same here."

Without further comments we both take off towards the edge of the plateau. As we get closer to the edge I can see more, there's water about thirty feet out. And it's about an eighty foot drop.

"Just jump!" Skitt orders next to me, I nod.

I match Skitt's strides as the edge rapidly approaches. Then my foot it on the edge as I thrust my body outwards and off the plateau. With my sword secured on my side my arms are free to control my free fall. I get the sensation of falling, only it lasts a lot longer than it ever has. Right before I hit the water one thought forms in my head.

I can't swim.

**Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! **

**I'm going to introduce a new character later on and I'm trying to decide on a name! I won't tell you anything about him, but in your review if you could state your favorite out of the following that would be great! Here are the ones I've narrowed it down too: Merrick, Zale, Caspian, Tyne, Rive, and Kevser(my personal favorite at the moment)!**

**If you look up what they mean you **_**might **_**be able to figure out the character XD**


	18. Chapter 18: Day decided

**Read and review **

-Finnick:

I hold my breath as the screen shows Skitt and Rachel jump and start to rapidly close the eighty foot gap between their takeoff point and the sea below.

"She can't swim!" Haymitch's worried yell bellows through the victor's room. All noise stops as everyone watches the screen. It shows them still falling, and then they disappear under the waves. Skitt expertly condenses his body together so that he will shoot to the sea floor and be able to push off to reach the surface. Rachel on the other hand doesn't know this, she ends up slamming hard against the water with her arms. Skitt resurfaces almost immediately and treads water as he waits for Rachel.

"She doesn't swim you tart." I moan at the screen, if only he could hear me. But then Rachel resurfaces as well, that's odd, she can't swim. That's when the broadcasters explain that the sea is extremely high in salt content, so much so that the victors will float. It's impossible to drown because you don't know how to swim here.

"That was fun, but we should get to shore." Rachel tells Skitt, he nods.

"Which shore?" he's right, there's a narrow strip of land that goes around the base of the plateau, it's only about ten feet wide and circles the whole land mass. Or they could make their way to the mainland with the forest.

"I'd prefer the woods, feels more like home."

Skitt nods and explains the basics of moving through water, before long they've reached shore and are hiking through the forest, heading uphill.

I decide they're safe for a while, so I get up and go to get something to drink. I grab a shot of some liquor, I'm about to take a sip before it's knocked out of my hand.

"We're both staying sober for her." Haymitch growls at me, I can see this is killing him, it's killing me too, but I understand. I nod and get water instead. Then go back to my couch and watch more, Haymitch sits next to me. "There's a meeting tonight, we're deciding the day." He means the day to get them out.

"Good, the sooner the better."

-Rachel:

Two hours since I jumped from the cliff Skitt and I decide it's safe to check our packs and weapons. As we stop the full guilt of what I've done hits me, I've killed another person, taken another life. Sure, I've done it plenty before, but, I knew Gloss. Yea, I didn't like her, but I knew her, I've known her almost all my life. I know that her favorite food was pasta, her favorite color purple, that she didn't like ice in her water.

"I hope you're happy" I growl, looking to the sky. "I hope you're happy that we're killing each other! I hope you're enjoying the fact that this is completely different! I knew her! We all have won already! Isn't that the deal win and you don't come back here!" I'm yelling to the sky now, Skitt is just standing there dumbfounded, not sure what to do. "You know what though! I'm glad to be here, we all are! Cause this is who we are now! Who you've made us be! We're killers! We're murderers!" I feel something be stuffed into my mouth, cutting off my rant against the Capital. Skitt figured out how to stop me.

"Please shut up" Skitt mumbles to me shyly.

I rip the, I look down at the object in my hand, towel? Okay then, this might come in handy; I throw it at Skitt's face for now. "You better stay on my good side; we're supposed to kill each other." I growl, this earns me a trident tip to my throat, okay Skitt found a trident too, wonderful.

"But we're allies, aren't we"

I glance at the trident that's at my throat. I nod my head slightly. "Yeah, we are." Skitt lowers his trident. Clearly our alliance won't last long if it's just the two of us.

We go through our packs together; there's little food, a few extra knives, two sleeping bags (which I'm sure Finnick is happy about), a spool of wire, and empty water containers.

"We should find fresh water first, there should be some nearby." I mention Skitt just nods to me. We repack and start off again, two hours later we're at the edge of one of the meadows. It's quiet and peaceful, usually that would be good, but these are the Hunger Games, quiet and peaceful isn't the norm here. "I'll go out to the pond, you watch my back" Skitt agrees to this and we go out.

When I reach the pool I quickly dunk my head in and then proceed to fill the three containers we have. Nothing's happened, which just adds to my fear that something will happen soon. I'm working on filling the last and just starting to think maybe something else is going on elsewhere so we will be left alone, when I feel a firm grip on my wrist.

"Holy hell! Skitt!" I scream out to the man who's standing a few yards off. I see a green hand holding on to my wrist with an iron grip, I don't know where the hand leads too, and I'd prefer not to find out. I struggle and the grip tightens, I try relaxing, and I start to be dragged into the water. "God Skitt!" I scream again, he sees me and runs over, he starts to repeatedly stab the hand with his trident, over and over again. After about twenty stabs the thing lets me go and I fall backwards into the grass.

"You okay?" Skitt kneels down to me.

"Yeah, let's get away from here; they may come out of the water. Whatever it is." I get up and brush myself off.

"Good thinking."

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By nightfall Skitt and I have set up a mini camp, Skitt has sown together mats for the both of us to put our sleeping bags on, and we both lie on them now, looking up at the sky and waiting for the anthem to play. I take the time to open up my token; I go through each one, looking at the picture, examining it.

"What's that?" Skitt asks as he watches me.

"My token, want to see?" I ask as I pat the spot next to me, Skitt gets up and sits next to me, I move so he can see the pictures too. I open a new one; it holds a picture of Chaff.

"You have a picture of Chaff?"

"Yea, he's like family, I have a picture of everyone in these."

"Really? Do you have one of me?" he questions, I nod and find one that has a four on the outside. I open it, but instead of Skitt it's a picture of Finnick, with me on his back. I laugh at it.

"Wrong one" I go and open another one with four on it, this one is of Skitt. He has his arm around Seier, his other is pointing up to the sky.

"I'm drunk in that one" he exclaims.

"It _was _hilarious." I point out

I go through all the pictures for Skitt, some pictures are funny, some serious, Skitt says his personal favorite is the one which Johanna is about to punch the camera. I open the one orange locket, sunset orange. It shows the picture of Peeta and I, Skitt puts his finger on it before I can close it.

"That's, ugh"

"Peeta" I finish for him.

"Yeah, that's Peeta. Do you still miss him?" he asks, I don't know why he's asking, but talking about it always makes me feel better, so I go along.

"Yeah, every day I think of him. But I have Finnick now, and I love him, and Peeta said he wants me to be happy. Finn makes me the happiest I can be right now. Peeta wrote me a letter you know, his family gave it to me a few months ago." I smile

"Really? What did he say?"

"That I should be happy, that I deserve to be happy. That he bets I'll end up with Finnick, which I did. And that he'll be the first one to meet me when I die, that he'll love me there and never leave my side."

"Does Finnick know that?" Skitt asks

"Yeah, we changed the vows from forever to just until we die. The funny part is, I'm not afraid to die anymore. When I die I won't be alone, my parents will be there, and the other victors, and Peeta. Everyone who I miss so much will be there, I won't be sad when I die. It'll be a new beginning."

Skitt opens his mouth to answer when the anthem blares all around us. It only shows Gloss's face tonight, making me feel worse about it. But it's surprising, the bloodbath only claimed one, so technically, there was no bloodbath. I offer to take first watch and Skitt readily agrees to this, I grip my knife in my hand and lean back against a tree. Then, I watch the night as Skitt snores lightly beside me.

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-No one's POV, in rebel meeting room:

The men and women in the room turn their attention to the man who is ordering they give him their attention. Plutarch Heavensbee stands and looks around the room. He nods gruffly to Haymitch Abernathy and Finnick Odair; both have their head in their hands, clearly being upset by the Games.

"Let's get right to the point, as you may all be wondering, for now there is no way to return to the Cornucopia once the victor jumps off the plateau, that will soon change though, I assure you that." He speaks in a way that only a head gamemaker can. "and so far, we only have one death, and we all know who we need to keep alive for now." People nod gruffly all around the meeting table, but Plutarch tells everyone the names anyways. "We need Lyn alive, so she can set off the wall, we need Skitt too, and Rachel, of course. Brandon and Johanna are also key, we need them alive."

There's silence for a while, Finnick Odair finally raises his head, his eyes grave, and while he asks the question everyone is thinking.

"What if we can't get them out?"

"Then these are once again regular Games." Plutarch answers him evenly.

Finnick goes over the plan again in his mind. _So Lyn detonates the explosion, making it so the rebel hovercrafts can come in. We get the victors and get the hell outta there. But we won't have much time before Capital hovercraft come and counterattack. _His mind goes blank for a few moments before another revelation comes to him. _It will be impossible to get all the victors out; the Capital will capture some of them. They will punish or execute who they capture._ It's Chaff who brings this to attention.

"What if we can't get Rachel out, she's the most important part of this."

"Then the Capital has her, and we hope she hangs on until we can get her out." Plutarch explains. Haymitch lets his head fall to the table with a loud thud as Ceier starts to comfort him and rub his back. Finnick lunges across the table at Plutarch, swearing at him and screaming at him.

"Hope she hangs on! What the fuck does that mean! Just let her get tortured if they get her before we can!"

It takes Chaff and Woof to grab and hold Finnick back until he calms down. Plutarch ignore the incident and starts to lay out the plan.

"We have been in contact with Thirteen and we have decided that we will put the plan into action four days from now, on the fifth day of the Games. That should give Skitt enough time to meet up with and get at least Johanna and Lyn to join the alliance. We just hope until then."

"And what if they don't make it till then." Finnick seethes through his teeth.

"Then we go ahead anyways, whoever dies in this will just be a martyr for the cause." At this Haymitch looks up from the table.

"It's great really; either they will be with us in the rebellion or dead, which will be gone from this fucked up government all together." He rubs his eyes with his hand.

"Exactly" Plutarch smiles, then the whole room is silent, nothing can be heard, except for Finnick's heavy breathing.


	19. Chapter 19: Death

**Do you listen to music when you write stories? I do, right now I'm listening to Awake and Alive by Skillet. Reminds me of Rachel and Finn. **

-Rachel:

When I wake up the first thing I notice is the warm sun on my face, the second thing I notice are the arms wrapped around me and I'm in someone's lap. Instantly I think Finnick, then I remember he's not here. I feel my eyes widen as I slowly turn my head. I see Skitt.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I get out of his lap.

"You started to shake after you fell asleep" he explains simply. That's, nice, of him? I guess.

"Oh, thanks, we should get going then, we've been here a while."

Skitt nods and we quickly pack and then continue hiking on, the ground incline rises. I go and run ahead of Skitt, then climb into a tree; hopefully I can get a better view from up here. I glance down and see Skitt leaning against the tree, casually guarding me with his trident in hand. I shrug, it won't do well in the forest, but oh well, he does best with it.

I easily scale to the top of the tree and lose sight of Skitt. I gasp at the view, we've covered a good thirty miles since the start of the Games. I can see the huge plateau , the golden horn of the cornucopia stands out from the sun behind it. The sea is a glistening foam blue, and I can see that the rest of the area is forest. I can't see any other victors, but I can tell the general shape of the area is a giant square. That could be dangerous, we could be walking and just hit it.

I easily start my way down to Skitt; I stop dead when I hear other voices. I look down to see Skitt and Brandon, a trident to Brandon's throat, a knife to Skitt's.

"I should kill you now; you'd be dead if you weren't prepared before." Brandon hisses at Skitt, slowly and silently I make my way down the tree, positioning myself over Brandon.

"Oh I know, too bad I was paying attention" Skitt rolls his eyes. This earns his the flat of Brandon's knife even closer over his neck. I slowly go and make myself so I hand only five feet above Brandon, and then when Skitt slowly nods his head I drop. Plummeting to the ground, with Brandon below me. He doesn't even have time to react, it's quick and easy when I take a knife from my belt and drive through the back of his neck.

Boom! His cannon fires, I nod to Skitt and we take off running.

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-Finnick:

A few hours later and Rachel's alliance group has grown. It now consists of her, Skitt, Johanna, Lyn, and Blight. They had run into Johanna, Lyn, and Blight an hour ago, they had combined alliances. Now they trek deeper into the forest, Lyn examines the wire; she's supposed to use it to disable the force field somehow. Rachel and Johanna are leading the others around; they're not sure where they're going.

"Just walking" Rachel had said when Blight had started to complain.

All of a sudden a scream rises up from far away. Everyone stops and listens again. The scream rises up again and everyone in the victor's room turns to stare at me. I look to the screen, Rachel's eyes dilate with fear.

"Rach, it's not real it's not real" Johanna is shaking Rachel, who isn't moving at all. What did she hear? My is she responding like this? The scream rises up again, then I realize, it's my voice. The third scream completely breaks her. Rachel is off sprinting all out through the woods towards my voice.

"Finn! Finnick!" She screams as she charges through the woods, her eyes bloodshot as she runs to my voice. No, it's not me though, it's a trick, just a stupid trick. She reaches were the noise is coming from and looks around frantically. "Finn, finn, finn" she whispers my name desperately over and over again. The broadcasters explain that it is not actually me, it's a jabberjay, which is hiding up in the tree.

The others catch up to her a few seconds later. Johanna grabs her and spins her around.

"It's not Finnick! Are you listening to me? It's not him; they're just playing a noise, to mess with us, with all of us." Johanna snarls in her face. She just nods slowly, she clams her hands over her ears. But as another scream rises, right by her, she starts to shake.

Two more screams later she breaks away from Blight, who was comforting her, and runs blindly through the woods. Another scream, and she's running faster, strait, not caring where it will take her.

"She's almost to the force field now" the broadcaster comments. I'm on my feet now,

"Turn around!" I cry to the screen, knowing it won't help, she can't run into the force field, she can't"

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-Rachel:

I take off running as another scream rises; I need to get away, so I can't hear it anymore. I'll die if I hear it again. They make him sound like he's in so much pain. I can't bear to hear him like that. So I go even faster when I hear it again. I glance back; my whole alliance is running after me, trying to catch up. They won't though.

I'm running full out when I slam into it. The force field. I'm catapulted backwards and I'm left writhing on the forest floor. Electric pulses surge through my body. My vision blurs, my heart skips a beat and then falls into an irregular rhythm. I can feel myself being lifted off the ground, but I can barely hear anything. Then someone's pounding on my chest. Then my world goes black and I make out the faint sound of a cannon.

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The darkness almost immediately is overtaken by light, and it takes a while until my eyesight adjusts. When my eyes do adjust I feel the smile spread across my face. There he is, like promised, in his casual clothes. Dusty blond hair, brilliant blue eyes. There is no evidence of his gruesome death. It's my Peeta.

Before I know it I'm in his arms, my head on his chest, his arms engulf me. I feel his lips graze my neck gently, I know he wants to kiss me, and I want to kiss him. I pull my head back and gaze into his eyes, he leans closer and I feel his lips on mine. My hands ball into fists against his strong chest. He rests his forehead against mine.

"I missed you." The sound of his voice, his actual voice, makes me want to never leave, and I will never have to leave. Because I am dead, I am dead but alive.

"I missed you too." I breathe as I kiss him again. After five more he puts his finger on my lips.

"But you need to go back, you need to still live." He tells me. He's asking me to do the unthinkable again. He's asking me to go back to life.

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-Finnick:

Boom! Her cannon fires at the exact moment my knees hit the floor. I hear a chorus of wails go up around me, I don't know from who, and I don't care. I don't care about anything right now, just that Rachel is dead. And, I'm the reason; my screams were what drove her to madness. I can't take my eyes off the screen though as Blight and Skitt work frantically to revive her.

_It's no use though_. I think over and over again in my head. _It's no use, it's no use, it's no use. _I don't even flinch when I see Skitt press his mouth to hers, forcing air into her, forcing her heart to start to beat again.

I feel someone helping me to my feet, I don't know who it is, but they lead me to the couch and sit me down. Then rub my back and say everything will be okay, they'll bring her back.

It's now that Lyn starts to hook up a contraption with her wire. She places one end over Rachel's heart, and then ties the other end around a rock. As she works on whatever she's doing Skitt continues to press his lips to Rachel's. It's no use though, why can't they see that?

;;;;;;;;;;;;;:::::::;;;;;;;;;;;;

-Rachel:

"I don't want to leave you." I plead to Peeta softly.

"You need to, you can change things maybe if you go back, and I want you too. You'll see me again. We you die for real."

"But I-" his lips cut my words off again.

"For me?" he asks gently. Slowly I nod; I'll do anything for Peeta. He pulls me close to him with a smile on his face. "I'll be watching over you." He promises me. I just nod, not wanting to let go.

Then I feel the electric shock that makes my heart race back to life again.

**Did you like it? It's a bit confusing, but hopefully that will be cleared up next chapter. The chapter after next we get to day five of the Games!**


	20. Chapter 20: Life

-Finnick:

I excuse myself as I stand up slowly and go over to the food table; slowly I wrap my hand around a steak knife. There's no reason for me to live now. She was my life, and now she is dead. As I lift the knife someone grasps my wrist.

"That's not a wise thing to do Finnick." Chaff tells me sternly, he crushes my hand until it opens, letting the blade fall to the floor. "Go watch, she's not dead."

I go and sit on the couch, Lyn has some contraption hooked up as she throws a rock into the force field. You can see the electricity run down the wire. Rachel's body jolts and then is still again, Skitt blows one last breath into her and then sits back. He scowls, "If she doesn't come back now then it's too late." He announces. Blight continues to press on her chest, forcing her heart to beat. He puts his ear to her chest once and grins.

"She's alive." His comment makes my head snap up, my eyes instantly brighten, and my heart hangs on to the thin line of hope that he may be right. I watch as slowly her hands ball into fists and then open again; the broadcasters are beside themselves wondering why in the world other tributes would revive another. She positions her arms and begins to sit up but stops and closes her eyes again, Skitt instantly goes behind her and supports her up, this time, it bothers me.

Over the next few hours Rachel slowly comes back to life. She gets up to her feet with help from Skitt and he helps her walk around some, he has her swing her arms around, her legs, and they see if she can catch. The catching doesn't go so well, but everything else is alright. In the end they are all on the move again, with Blight and Skitt taking turns carrying her and Johanna making fun of her all the while. Lyn is still entranced with her wire as she looks around the arena, occasionally asking questions about who is left alive.

On the other hand, Lyme, Dillad, and Pren have all formed an alliance and are out looking for the others, looking to take them out. Cariad and Tir are both on their own.

;;;;;;;;;;;::::::::::;;;;;;;;;;;

-Rachel:

The sun is going down when we stop at the shoreline to make camp. We had decided to turn around and go back to the sea after I died, deciding that it would be the safer way. Blight sets me down and I stumble over and sit with my back against a tree. My stomach rumbles, reminding me that it hasn't had any food in two days. I need food, I'd be able to help the others and not be carried if I did. I look up to the sky and sneer, "Some food would be appreciated, if you aren't too drunk."

It's almost funny how quickly the parachute comes from the sky. I open it eagerly and find seven pieces of District Five bread. "Hey, food!" I call out, everyone's head immediately turns to me and they all come over. Blight is the first to arrive.

"How many pieces?" he asks eagerly.

"Seven, which I don't get, because that will never sort evenly."

"Yea, it won't will it." Blight's mind is clearly elsewhere as I pick up a piece and shove it into my mouth. It's not like the bread at home, but it's good and for now, it will suit me just fine.

;;;::::;;;;

On the morning of the next day, day three, I'm awoken by Lyn.

"I got it!" She cheers; I bolt upright, got what? She woke everyone else up too.

"What?" I spit out.

"I know how we can take out Lyme, Pren, and Dillad." She smiles. This makes everyone sit up and listen to her. "Okay, so does anyone know why we can't drown in the sea?" She asks. Nobody says anything, I have no idea why. Lyn doesn't hide her disappointment. "It's because of the high salt content, it keeps us afloat. Now what is important about salt water? Skitt you must know."

Skitt scratches his head, "Ugh, you can't drink it." He shrugs.

"What about with electricity"

"Oh! It's highly conductive." Skitt gets it now.

"Exactly!" Lyn is very pleased with her students. "So what I say we do is we take my wire, then we place it in the sea, after that we put the other end in the force field. We fry the sea, and make sure the others are in the water." She beams at us.

;;;::::;;;;

-Skitt:

I can see the real purpose of Lyn's plan, because I know what the water really is. The water technically isn't water. It just looks like water, it does have salt, but then a special chemical too. So when the electricity from the field reaches the water, then it will bounce back and go back to the force field, its strength magnified to be ten times stronger. The force field will destroy itself.

Once it's destroyed, we get rescued. Hurray!

I stay with Rachel while the others go into the woods to hunt for food. We get bored almost immediately, so I give her a piece of Lyn's wire and we start to tie different knots. Eventually it turns into some kind of competition to see who knows how to tie more knots. I do a rather complex one and she laughs at me.

"I haven't tied that one since last month, when" her sentence is cut off when her mouth falls open and her face goes completely white. I just stare at her.

"Rachel?" I ask getting a little worried. I seem to snap her somewhat out of this little trance thing she's in and her hand goes over her stomach. "Hey are you okay?" I ask the question and immediately know my answer will be a no.

"Seeder, help" she groans. Okay, awkward. Seeder isn't here.

;;;:::;;;

-Seeder:

"Seeder, help" Rachel groans to me. This confirms my thought that she's thinking the same thing that every woman who knows she and Finnick slept together are thinking. She thinks she's pregnant. Every victor in the room looks at me.

"I know what she wants relax!" I spit out at them. "Finnick, come over here though!" I yell across the room to him. He looks confused but stands up and walks over. He may as well know what she's thinking because he won't come to the conclusion himself. He follows me until we're alone by the gift sending table.

"Yeah?" he asks. "What's going on?"

"You," I point my finger at him. "my friend, may be a father. Congrats."

I'm not exaggerating when I say Finnick's face goes snow white. "What"

"but that's to be found out momentarily, give me a sec"

I go over and send Rachel the gift she wants, something to confirm her fears or not. Afterwards I go and sit next to a very unstable Finnick, who has his hands covering his mouth. It shows Rachel eagerly grab the parachute then excuse herself from Skitt. It shows Johanna throw an axe and take down some deer creature. Next, it shows Rachel barging her way angrily back to Skitt.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Skitt asks. Rachel throws something in front of him.

"Yes _we're _both fabulous!" she yells throwing her hands up in the air. The screen zooms in on what she threw in front of Skitt. A pregnancy test and it says positive.

;;;:::;;;

To my surprise I look over to see Finnick's head in his hands, but he's laughing.

"Haymitch is gunna kill me" he laughs harder. To emphasize his point we hear crashing.

"WHERE IS THAT KID, I'LL KILL HIM! LET ME KILL HIM NOW!" Haymitch's scream fills the whole room.


	21. Chapter 21: Out

**Hmm only two more chapters after this till the end of this book! Then a few weeks later I'm gunna start on the third and final one for this 3. I'm going to finish Fire Hearts after this book, which will take a few weeks. Then, after that, start writing another HG book. For some reason I'm now kinda obsessed with Gale stories, so that's what my next book will be. Enjoy this chapter, a lot happens, and please please please review! I love everyone who reviews my stories! Including the ever faithful constant reviewer's booksandmusic97 and meganlucindxo! I always look forward to reading your reviews (which gets me in trouble sometimes when I check during school XD) **

-Finnick:

_Note to self: Never underestimate the strength of a pissed off father. _

That's what I think when Haymitch has me in a choke hold against a wall.

"How could you!" He spits, literally spits, in my face. I try to answer him but just end up groaning, it's hard to say words without air, which I'm losing quickly. Haymitch seems to realize this, and lucky for me, he wants to hear my answer. He lets go and I fall to the floor, gasping for air. I try to catch my breath before I answer, but this displeases my father-in-law as he kicks me in the groin when I don't answer right away. I guess he doesn't want more grandchildren.

"I. Didn't. Know." I gasp out.

"That's fucking wonderful! You know why!" I open my mouth to answer, but apparently that was a rhetorical question, I hate rhetorical questions, they confuse me. "Because of you," he kicks my groin harder again. "now have put two people in there! Your wife and your child! My daughter and my grandchild! What were you thinking?"

What was I thinking? Well, I was really thinking dirty thoughts while I slept with her, but I'm thinking this would piss him off more if I tell the truth. And personally I would like to not have my manhood kicked out of me today. So I give a cleaner response. "That I love her."

"Good answer fish boy." He sneers at me. Fish boy? That's an old nickname, way to be a creative thinker Haymitch. I watch as he briskly walks away, leaving me on the floor and takes a shot of liquor and chugs it down. So much for staying sober.

-Rachel:

By afternoon I sit with Johanna as we discuss the topic of names. All day we've been putting together Lyn's plan, mapping it out in the dirt. Tomorrow we will put it together, the next morning, we try it out. Hopefully it works. The others had brought back some game, which we all ate greedily, so for once we have full stomachs. When I told them about the baby all the men just didn't care, sure they said congrats and everything, but that was it. Lyn was happy for me, but I could tell she was sad for me. Who isn't, chances are we both will die.

Johanna on the other hand was ecstatic about the whole thing. I never really saw her as a baby person, but I guess I was wrong. We've been trying to come up with names for a while when Skitt just looks over.

"What about some ocean name? I know quite a few myself." He suggests from the mat he made and is now sunbathing on. Johanna and I share a glance.

"Great idea!" we say in unison.

"Shoot" I tell him eagerly.

"There's Merrick, that's the protector of the ocean; Zale, that means strong sea; Caspian, that was the name of some ancient sea that's all dried up now; Tyne, that's also an old river; Rive, means from the shore; Kevser, that's a river in paradise. Lily, that's a pond plant; River, which explains itself; Rhine, also a river; and then there's Harper, that's a type of seal." He casually gives us name choices.

"Hmm, I like Caspian, Kevser, and Rhine." Johanna voices her opinion.

"Kevser, Kevser, Kevser." I whisper the name to myself over and over again. "Kevser Peeta Odair." I say firmly. It would work as a boy or girl name. I nod, I like it. Too bad Finnick isn't here to voice his opinion. I think he'd like it though.

"Is that the name?" Blight asks me.

"Yea" I smile broadly.

;;;;:::;;;;

-Finnick:

"Kevser Peeta Odair." Rachel says firmly. Okay, that would work for a boy or a girl. I'm not too happy with the fact that Skitt came up with the name of my child, but I do like the name. I can call him Kev or something like, if it's a boy, which I kinda hope it is. And I'm not surprised at all by the middle name, I'm glad she's using Peeta's name. He deserves to be honored; he did so much for both of us.

;;;:::;;;;

-Rachel:

My allies and I wake early on the fifth day in the arena. I take my piece of bread that has just arrived; we've been getting it every day, twice a day. Always District Five bread, seven pieces of it too. Lyn gathers us in a circle one more time to go over our plan.

"Okay, so, in a few minutes Blight and Johanna, you run off and create a diversion. Make sure you get the others in the water. Before they get in the water you two." She motions to Skitt and I, "will run down with the wire and place it in the sea, then swim across and go up to the cornucopia." Yesterday the land around the plateau gave way and now it is just a steep hill to get to the horn. "Reflect your blade off the surface towards me; I'll put the other end of the wire in the force field, that should work." We all nod solemnly; Lyn has to put the wire in the force field by hand. Which means she will also get shocked; she won't survive to see tomorrow. I get up and embrace her.

"Be strong." She whispers in my ear.

"Always." I assure her.

Then, with forty five minutes till seven, Johanna and Blight take off through the forest. Skitt hands me the coil of wire and nods. I hug Lyn one last time before we take off for the sea. We sprint effortlessly through the woods towards the shore. Halfway I switch off with Skitt, who gives me a look saying we need to hurry. I nod and push myself faster; I don't even stop when I feel the bile coming up my throat. I suck it up and swallow it back done my throat.

We soon reach the sea and dive in; I feel Skitt put his arm around my waist so we can move faster through the water. Halfway across we move faster, and I notice Skitt has dropped the wire in. I glance back and see Johanna and Blight, with Lyme, Dillad, and Pren in tow, just coming out of the woods onto the shoreline. Within seconds of looking back I'm on the opposite shoreline and Skitt is pushing me forwards so we can get to the golden horn. It's a steep incline, so I take out my sword in order to help me as a walking stick. It takes ten minutes to make it up, which is a big change from the ten seconds it took to jump down this a few days earlier. I look back when we reach the top as Skitt lets me have thirty seconds of rest, no more, no less. Blight is in the water slightly now, Lyme and Pren are also in, but waist deep. Good, so far so good. Skitt shoves me on as we race to the horn. I take out my sword and flash it on the horn, Lyn's signal.

I watch as Blight turns and starts to sprint out of the water, seeing my sign, as Lyn shoves the wire into the force field. I can see the electricity race across the wire and hit the sea. I watch as the electric current connects with the water. The whole sea lights up as two cannon shots go off instantly; Pren and Lyme. I see Blight has barely made it out. And then the electric current bounce back and begins to travel back up the wire, faster than before, brighter than before. I glance at Skitt, he nods his approval to what I'm watching.

The electricity collides with the force field again. Suddenly all around me the sky is changed into a clear dome, streaks of bright light cut across it, like breaking glass. The noise is excruciating to my ears and I cover them to block the sound of fire and explosions. I'm being shoved again as the dome above Skitt and I begins to rain down. Massive pieces of disabled force field falls from the sky around us.

"Move!" Skitt commands as he shoves me forwards. I don't even look back to see if he's following me or not. I don't know what's happening; all I know is that it isn't good. I run blindly towards the edge and do the only thing I can think of, once at the edge, I leap out and once again begin to plummet down to the sea; which is still somewhat electrically charged.

;;;:::;;;;

-Finnick:

I watch from the District Thirteen helicopter as we move in to get Blight and Johanna. They're running blindly through a forest of which is totally engulfed in flames from the falling force field. They stop when they see us and we easily pick them up; the Capital hasn't arrived yet. As soon as they're in the helicopter they both go unconscious from the severe burns that cover their bodies. Doctors from Thirteen rush in the help; I listen in on the conversation in my earpiece.

"She jumped!" Someone gasps.

"What!" I demand at them through the speaking portion of the device.

"She panicked and jumped off, she's not moving."

I begin to scream and thrash wildly. "No! No she's not dead! She can't die!" I yell while people try to comfort me, tell me everything's okay. But soon I feel a needle in my back and my world goes black.

-Rachel:

As soon as I come in contact with the water my body goes rigid, I float on top but can't move. My body spazzes and burns from the electricity running through me. But then I see a claw coming from a helicopter to pick me up. I'm lifted up and into the helicopter, where, once there, I'm handed over to Capital doctors.

"Paralyzed" one confirms to another.

But my thoughts are racing, where am I? Why am I here? What is going on? Where is Finnick?

**Blahh, sorry this REALLY didn't come out the way I wanted it too. But it gets the point across. Explained better in final two chapters. **


	22. Chapter 22: Venom

**Ya for new chapters! You know the drill *wink***

-Rachel:

It's been a month since I was captured by the Capital. I've been in a living hell far worse than I ever imagined for a month. I don't even bother to get up when I hear the door open to my cell; I don't even bother to glance up. I just look down at my stomach, which is showing the signs that soon my baby will be born. Special shots have made the process go six times faster than usual, and soon I will be a mother. The cell door screeches shut again.

"Rachel?" I hear a man's voice call my name, it's faintly familiar to me. I look up slowly, I lock eyes with a young man, his bronze hair is in a buzz cut and scars are prominent over his whole body. His eyes remind me of who he is, his ocean blue eyes. If they had changed his eyes, he would look completely different than from the strong man I remember him to be.

"Skitt" I choke out hoarsely. Before long we're wrapped in an embrace, each thrilled the other is alive. He puts his hands on my shoulders and looks me over.

"You look terrible."

He's right. You wouldn't look too good yourself if you had information beaten out of you that you didn't know. Beaten until you gave them false answers, because you don't know the truth. Then beaten again when they discover you 'lied' to them. That's what happens every day; every single day I am beaten without mercy. I'm fed little, just enough to keep my baby and I alive. They do something else to me too, something to my memories each day. Making my hate and terror towards a rebel man grow with each passing day.

"They'll get us out, don't you worry. Finnick will get us out." Skitt soothes, only I stiffen with fear at his name. Finnick Odair is not human; Finnick Odair is a dastardly terrifying mutt that wants only one thing but to make me suffer. He's done a pretty good job of it too. He killed my mother. Then he killed my father. Then he would beat me whenever he got the chance to. He made me go in the Games. He killed Peeta. He was the one who sold me to other men. He was the one who got Gale beaten. Skitt looks deep into my eyes worry in his own. "What's wrong, Finn will save us." He repeats.

"That mutt would rather have us dead!" I scream in his face. Tears welling up in my own, just his name physically hurts me.

"No," Skitt's eyes widen at my words. "No, they didn't do this to you. They can't. They couldn't." he seems to realize something.

"That, that thing, does nothing but hurt me whenever he can!" I growl out to Skitt.

"No, he would never hurt you, he never has."

"He killed everyone I loved! He sold me! He made me go in the Games!" I scream louder now.

"When is Kevser going to be born?" Skitt changes the subject quickly; my baby's name instantly calms me.

"Two days." I smile; it instantly fades when the cell opens again and a peacekeeper comes in and grabs me. "No!" I scream as they start to drag me out.

"Let her be!" Skitt rushes over, but another peacekeeper stabs him in the gut with the butt of his gun, causing him to keel over on the cement floor.

"Sorry boy, she's got an interview."

;;;:::;;;

-Finnick:

Over, under, trough, pull. Over, under, trough, pull. I tie and retie knot after knot on my length of rope. Over and over and over again. I try not to think of her but think of nothing else. They must be beating her, torturing her, making her suffer for things she doesn't know about. A buzzing by my ear distracts me for a moment as I swat the hummingbird away from me.

That's where I'm sitting, in the hummingbird room, in District Thirteen. I've been here for a month now. I'm no help at all though, I can't help fight in the full scale rebellion that's going on all over Panem. I'm mentally unstable now, constantly worrying, constantly fearing the worst. I look up as Haymitch walks in. He's been a lot better off than I have, overloading himself with work so he doesn't go insane or fall apart, like I have.

"Come on, they want us in Command." He tells me gently, speaking like he's talking to a little child. I nod and stand up in my simple clothes. My gray uniform that everyone in Thirteen wears. I follow Haymitch to Command, where everyone in the room in crowded around the television. I see President Coin as she turns and sees me.

"No, get Odair out, he doesn't need to see." She says quickly, and then soldiers are blocking my view of the television. But now I want to see, because I know it's bad, and it's from the Capital, and they want me to see it if Coin doesn't. I shove the soldiers aside as I step closer, then I see her. Rachel.

She's barely recognizable with the scars that cover her. What sticks out the most is her stomach; she looks like she's due any day, any _moment._ But it's only been a month. Caesar Flickerman sits next to her as her eyes train on something that we can't see. She's shaking violently, but Caesar tries to get around this.

"So Rachel, how have you been?" he asks in a cheery voice. She doesn't seem to hear him and he repeats the question, her head snaps towards him.

"Oh sorry, well, I've been better I'll say that." _Of course you've been better._ I move closer to the television, everyone in the room watches me closely.

"Haven't we all. With the rebellion and such, so what are your views on this?"

"Well, I think. I think." She glances around the room cautiously. "I think that it's, pointless." She finishes. I can tell she doesn't think this at all though.

"Of course, care to broaden?"

"Sure. I think that it is pointless because everyone fighting the strong Capital, who have stronger weapons and everything. And I feel bad for everyone back in District Thirteen, gone by nightfall." She adds the last part slowly, emphasizing each syllable. The whole television screen turns into a frenzy as the camera that is filming is knocked down. It shows Rachel's feet, and then her scream fills the room as she drops to the floor. Her face is right in front of the camera. I watch in horror as soon a boot collides full on with her face, again, and again, and again. There's another whacking noise and blood covers the lens, another scream, and then the broadcast is turned off.

I'm looking around the room panicked. "We need to get her out! They'll kill her!" I scream at no one in particular.

"We can't get her out Soldier Odair." Coin says smoothly.

"What do you mean you can't? They'll kill her!"

"No they won't."

"How are you so sure! She's being beaten right now!" It's Haymitch who is now been awakened from his state of shock and is yelling.

"Because he's doing this to break both of you." She motions to Haymitch and I. Until we're broken? I'm already way past broken. "And we need to prove them wrong, prove that you're strong. Odair, you start training as soon as possible. Abernathy, continue your work. We need to get everyone undercover now! If the girl's right we will be bombed or attacked by nightfall!" Coin starts yelling out orders, she presses a button and sirens blast throughout all of Thirteen. I calmly walk down, further into the earth, to the safe room.

_He's doing this to break both of you. _It rings over and over in my head as I walk through the crowded hallways. Break me? What will break me when I'm already broken? They have my wife, they have my child. They have my world dangling above my head like a hundred ton weight, one false move, and it all comes crashing down to kill you.

;;;:::;;;

-Rachel:

I'm dragged off the floor of the stage. At least he's warned; at least maybe my father will live now. Haymitch. That's why I warned them of the coming bombers. That's why I suck it up for the millionth time and take another beating. That's why I'm being dragged onto the table; a screen in front of my face, a needle poised somewhere where I can't see it, waiting to stab me.

I watch as the screen comes to life. It's me, and the man, but I'm not scared this time. This is one of the few good memories I have of him. I remember it as I watch it. I watch myself as I run through the victor's room to Finnick's outstretched arms. He scoops me up effortlessly and twirls me around in a circle. I feel a sharp stab of a needle as venom is leaked into my system. My mind changed what I watch on screen.

Finnick goes and shoves me to the floor; I can feel the physical pain on my body. And then he laughs in my face and kicks me. Over, and over, and over again. I plead for him to stop; I tell him I love him and that he's hurting me.

"Good" he snarls out at me as he proceeds to lift me up from my neck, cutting off my air. He punches me in the gut as I'm thrown back to the floor. The screen before me goes black as I'm left trembling on the metal table.

Moments later a picture of Finnick appears on the screen. I let my scream; filled with hate, terror, and distrust, fill the room. My fist collides with the screen, right where his face is, and it shatters. My hand is left scratched and bloody.

He's nothing but a killer. A cold-hearted killer. A murderer. A thief. A liar. A backstabber.

A mutt.

**Ugh oh. Yes, she's been hijacked if you're still wondering. This is never a good thing. **


	23. Chapter 23: Kevser

**Ahhh yes, the final chapter to this book. Again I would like to thank everyone for the reviews, I very much appreciate them and they keep me motivated to keep writing. I never really know what reading these will make the reader feel like, since in my head I've known what was going to happen the whole time, so the reviews let me know Once again, read and review, enjoy the ending. **

-Rachel:

I'm thrown forcefully back into my cell, but instead of being greeted by the cement floor, I'm caught in Skitt's arms. He begins to loosen his grip around me to let me go but I grab his arms and keep them in place.

"No! Don't let go." I beg him, I've been alone for a month, and with my only social interactions I've been beaten. It's a welcoming feeling to have Skitt hold me close to him. He seems to either understand, or feel the same way.

"Okay." He agrees and continues to hold me as I tremble. He runs his fingers through what's left of my hair; it's a comforting and familiar feeling that I welcome. It makes me feel like someone does care about me, that I'm not forgotten. I rest my head on Skitt's shoulder and he rests his head back on the wall and sighs.

"What?" I ask him gently.

"I wish we could get outta here."

"We will, some day we will."

;;;;::::;;;;;;

I stop momentarily from my length of rope to listen to the deep rumble as another bomb explodes above our heads. She was right, about the bombing. Of course she was. She's saving us and we're just going to sit back and not save her. My mind starts to race and I do the only thing that will keep me from breaking down. I tie more knots. I tie until my fingers bleed red.

"Would you rather talk then tie your fingers off?" a voice asks and I look up. I don't recognize the boy in front of me, standing in my little square in this huge safe room that must be at least five miles underground.

"Who are you?" I ask curiously, I guess he can't be all too bad, if he wants to help me. He stretches out his hand.

"Gale. Gale Hawthorne, I'm a friend of Rachel's" he explains. I manage a little smile and shake his hand.

"Sure, why not talk." I motion for him to come and sit beside me.

For the next two hours Gale tells me about his life back in District Twelve, and I tell him about mine back in Four. We would've chatted a lot longer if it wasn't for Coin announcing it was lights out in five minutes. I didn't want Gale tripping over everyone to get back to his square in the dark.

My dreams are mostly of Rachel, being beaten, neglected. I wonder where she even is. In a cell? Alone? Is Skitt with her? I hope Skitt is with her, he'll take care of her, and he won't let her die of depression. I hang on to the hope that Skitt is with her, with this thought I sleep easier.

;;::;;

-Rachel:

I wake up to a sharp pain. I double over in Skitt's arms, he's instantly awake.

"What's wrong?" he asks in a worried voice.

I can't answer him as more pain comes, then it's gone.

"Nothin' I'm fine." I choke out. Soon I'm asleep again.

Later I wake up again, more pain. Skitt's awake again, worried more than ever. The pain goes away, and then it comes back, leaves, comes back, leaves, comes back. The tenth time it comes back it's too much to take and I know what's going on.

"Kevser." I explain to him in one word.

"But it's not supposed to come until later." Skitt protests. I glare at him.

"It doesn't know that, get someone!" I demand. Skitt's up on his feet soon, instead of screaming, which we can't scream. He bangs on the bars of the cell, I cover my ears, but soon peacekeepers are there. And then they're helping me out, taking me away.

;;::;;

Two long and agonizing hours later I lay on a table, my newborn son in my arms. I hold him close to me, not letting anyone else touch him, or hold him. For now, he's all mine.

I look into his blue eyes, they look familiar, they must be from his father, whoever that is. I was told its Finnick Odair, but it can't be. I would never voluntarily let that mutt touch me. But I can't ignore the fact that he does look so much like the mutt man. Same broad shoulders, same color eyes, same color hair, which he was born with a full head of. If, by some impossible way, the father of Kevser is Finnick, then I still love him more than anything. I'll always love my son.

"I love you Kevser. Happy birthday." I smile down at him. He looks so new, so clean. It's striking the contrast between our two bodies. He doesn't have a scratch on him. I'm covered in scars, in cuts, in bruises, in dried blood. His skin smooth as silk to my touch. My skin rough and battered to his touch.

The door opens and Caesar walks in, camera crew in tow. Of course, they want to show us to the nation. Caesar comes over and peers over my shoulder.

"He's beautiful Rachel, looks just like his father." Caesar says in genuine sympathy.

"Thank you." I grin at him.

Soon the cameras are set up and Caesar sits next to me, we're about to begin when I'm struck with fear. I don't want to do this. I glance nervously to Caesar.

"Can Skitt be in this too? I don't want to do this alone." I ask, no, I plead. Caesar nods. Minutes later Skitt walks in, he gives me a quick hug of congratulations. I even let him hold Kevser for a moment before I need him back to begin the interview. Skitt sits next to me, the red light goes on. I reach for Skitt's hand, because he's the only adult in the room who I'm positive won't hurt me.

;;;:::;;;;

-Finnick:

The big television in the safe room comes to life the next morning. I look up at it as the Capital symbol shows up. The words that appear shock me. "Kevser Odair: Born October 12" I freeze right there in my square, eyes locked on the screen.

I can't help the smile that spreads across my face when I see her on the bed. When I see the little baby wrapped in a blanket in her arms. My son. Our son. I can't help thinking how much he looks like her. His eyes are the same shape, his nose the same, his jawline.

Skitt stands next to her too. He also looks awful; no longer does he have his long waved hair. It's been shaved off, and by the scars on his head, they used a knife to do it. He doesn't look like the strong guy who went into the arena, no, he's bony and skinny. Little muscle is left on him. My eyes go down to see that he has Rachel's hand firmly in his own. Good, they're together; she's not going through this alone. Even though it looks like she's been getting the worst of it.

"So, Rachel, I think I speak for all of Panem when I say congratulations." Caesar smiles at her, she even smiles back.

"Thank you" she chokes out, her voice is hoarse and scratchy. It kills me to hear and see her like this.

"So, what's his name?"

"Kevser Peeta O-" her face contorts as she begins to tremble. Odair, why can't she say it? Why can't she say our name?

"Odair?" Caesar offers for her.

"No! He does not have that, that, that thing's name!" Her voice cracks at least five times as she screams at Caesar.

I feel myself drop to my knees. _That thing's name! That thing. That thing. _Her words play over and over again in my head. What is she saying? I'm a thing? I'm not even human, what have I done? What have they done to her?

"What's his last name?" Caesar is obviously confused. She seems puzzled over this for a second. My heart aches as I wait for her answer, whatever she says will kill me. The other victors are around me now too, as I sit on my knees, my eyes glued to her face.

"Mellark" she answers after what seems like eternity. I let myself fall back on my heels and I let my face fall into my hands. I begin to sob heavily, not able to stop. I feel a hand rubbing my back, trying to comfort me.

"It's okay Finn, they've done something to her, it's not your fault, it's not." Ceier whispers to me gently.

No one can comfort me though. No one in the room has ever had to listen as the girl they love calls you a thing. No one has ever watched as she seems to be physically hurt when someone says your name to her. No one has ever had to live with the fact that your wife thinks you child's father is someone who's been dead for two years. No one has been through this before but me. No one can comfort me. No one can help me now.

;;;;:::;;;;

-Rachel:

"Mellark" I answer after some thinking. Peeta, he must be the father of Kevser. It makes sense. The blond hair, blue eyes, broad shoulders. Peeta had all of that. And I loved Peeta, more than anything else in the world.

Caesar nods solemnly then says his goodbye's and wishes me luck. With that he's gone. With that Skitt and I are taken back to our cells. Only this time Kevser is with us too. Because really, they don't care about my baby, they just want to abuse us.

;;;;::;;;

-Haymitch:

With the help of Chaff I manage to get Finnick up to his feet and drag him over to a corner, where our little emergency meeting will be held. Soon Coin, Plutarch, and some other high ranking officials are there too. I glance at Finnick, he's curled up in a ball on the cold floor, his eyes shut to the world. He's broken. Again. The Capital broke someone who already was, they broke him to the point where he can't take seeing the world.

"Okay, some a medical team has informed me that they believe that the Capital has, or is still in the process, of hijacking Rachel." Coin gets right to the point, as always.

"What's that?" I ask solemnly to her.

"No one really knows, it's highly secret. Basically, what we think it is is that, say in her case, they show her a memory with Finnick involved, and then infuse her system with tracker jacker venom. Her mind would then make the memory scary, terrifying really."

"So Finnick just turns into a scary monster?" I'm confused.

"Not really, she would just see the memory as something good was going to happen before he turned on her. Beat her, used her, or killed someone she loves. That's most likely what she's been seeing. So now she just sees him as a threat, as something that's not human really."

It's heartbreaking even for me as I hear Finnick's low sobs. It's heartbreaking to ever hear a grown man cry. It's even worse when it's a strong one.

"So what now?" Finnick sobs out, barely audible.

"Now, now we make a plan to get them out."

**I hope you enjoyed the ending. This way a tricky way to end the book but I think it turned out well. So just one quick question for y'all:**

**Should I write the story that's Gale x OC or Gale's Daughter x Peeta and Katniss's kids? I have, what I think to be, pretty good ideas for either story. **

**Thank you again for reading this book, your reviews mean so much to me, you have no idea how much I look forward to reading them when I post a new chapter and they always make me laugh **


	24. A Thank You

Authors Note:

So basically this is a big thank you to everyone who read this story! It really does mean a lot to me, I had always written stories before but never really put them out to share with others. The feedback I got for this story and the one before it was absolutely amazing to me. I AM planning on writing the third and final book for this series once I finish another book I've just started. I would LOVE it if you read it too, it has the same themes as A Dangerous Game and Capital Bound do. Here's a little excerpt from the first chapter, which I've already posted:

"_Morning Den." He smiles at me. My names not really Den, no, that's just my nickname. My real name is Denver, Denver Rowsell. An eighteen year old girl who lives in the Seam, who hates the Capital, and is a regular in the Hob. I let go of my brother and go over and check our food supply. Low. Of course it is, it always is, but I don't mind. We get what we can, we have what we have. I slice a piece of bread off of the half loaf of stale bread that we have out and chew it slowly. I can just get some soup from Greasy Sae when I go to the Hob once Kline leaves for work, which should be soon. I go and sit across from him; he's already in his work clothes; his pick axe and hardhat wait by the door. _

"_I was going to see if I can get some more firewood today." I casually inform him. _

"_Good, we'll run out soon. Only get enough for this week though, we need food too." Kline sounds like he's forty years old, not twenty one, when he says things like this. I can barely remember the fun-loving brother I grew up with. Who always ran outside, forgetting to brush his black hair, and go off and pull pranks or play with his friends. No, he's grown up a lot in the past few years. _

"_I know, you should be off now, you'll be late." _

_Kline nods and pushes his chair back. I shove the rest of my bread in my mouth and go and grab his coat for him. It's our fathers, but Kline uses it now for walks to the mines. I hand it to him as he finishes lacing up his leather work boots. They're covered in a layer of coal dust, like everything else is. He puts on his hardhat and I wait patiently to hand him his pickaxe. It's heavy in my hands, but Kline carries it with ease. I hand it to him as he steps out the door. I follow him out and stand on the rickety thing we call our porch. Our whole house is in bad shape, but it has a foundation and keeps the roof above our heads, so it works. I give Kline a quick hug. _

"_Be careful." I warn him, mining is extremely dangerous; any day could be his last. _

"_I always am." He grins down at me and pats my back, then starts to make his way down the road towards the mines at the south end of the Seam. I glance over to the house a few houses down from ours on the other side of the road. I see Gale Hawthorne give his little sister Posy a hug goodbye; he stands up and ruffles her pale red hair. I smile at the sight of them, which I see every morning. _

_Gale steps off his porch and begins his way to the mines; I raise my hand slightly to him in greeting as he passes my house. _

"_Morning" I call out to him. He turns his head and gives me a slight nod and mimics the gesture I gave him. _

"_Good morning." He answers without stopping. _

_And that's the only interaction I've had with Gale Hawthorne every single day for the past six years._

So again a big big thank you to everyone who read this story and especially to my reviewers who I love. I have to have been caught at least six times at school checking on my iPod to see if you've reviewed yet or not. Hopefully I'll hear from you all again in reviews on the third book. And if you have any suggestions for it or have something you would like to see feel free to PM me and voice them, maybe I'll put them in ;)

Mocking Verse


	25. AN

Hey everybody! So I have good news!

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Lol I had to do that, it was too tempting. So anyways I WILL BE STARTING THE THIRD BOOK SOON! Like, really soon! It will be the final book to this trilogy too! Which I'm kinda sad about. Oh well. Anyways I should get the first chapter up sometime in the next two weeks. But before that, I need to come up with a name. Otherwise the title will just be "The book with no title yet" which I doubt will catch people's attention. So here are a few I've come up with so far, you can pick your favorite:

Falling For You: Again

Rebellion For Two

Just Hold On

Odair They Are (lol not really but that just popped into my head)

A Capital's Game

So yeah….I'm excited to start this story up again! But not as excited as I am to see the HG movie!


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